Give me bad advice...

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Women really do like football. And they enjoy it when you shlup on the couch all day and really don't mind being interrupted from what they are doing to make you that third sandwich.
 
If a bee lands on you, smack it.


Nice one! That is so funny. I can't tell how many times I was sitting with folks at a picnic table and someone sitting with us violently swaps at a bee....

It's like dude... you either kill it, leave it alone, or gently shoo it away. If you swat at it without killing it, you're just going to get someone stung... maybe someone with a deathly allergy.

I gently shoo bees away, and they leave. I don't know why, but they get difference. Plus cucumber skins and peppermint keep bees away.
 
Women do like appliances and cooking accessories as Anniversary gifts. Afterall, the recliner and big screen TV you expect are for the house as well.
 
Marry the first person that comes along even if you dont like them, you may not get another chance and we do NOT want to be left out.
 
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To ensure her acceptance of your proposal of marriage, say to her, "you weren't my first choice, but you seem to have mastered the art of submission."