Let's Have a Very Controversial Conversation About: Haircuts! Do You Want Your Barber/Hairdresser to Talk to You the Whole Time?
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I haven't paid for a haircut in over 20 years. I got tired of getting bad haircuts. Especially when I tell them exactly how I want it cut and they still mess it up.Hey Everyone,
I enjoy listening to a few social commentary channels on YouTube, and one of the latest topics has been about barber shops. The first wave of commentary was about how some barbers are charging $100 a cut because they say their skills are worth it, with owners saying they were providing a first-rate, luxury experience at their shops.
Then came the inevitable fallout, with footage of now-empty shops. Former customers said there was no way they were paying that kind of money for a cut, and many men stated several reasons things they didn't like about "modern" barber shops.
Two things that stood out to me was when they said they didn't like having to make appointments (I guess traditional barber shops were mostly walk-in's?) As a woman, I've almost always made appointments for haircuts, unless I just stopped into a place like Supercuts on a whim. And the second thing was that some of the younger men said they didn't like barbers who talked during the entire cut. One young man said he had to listen to people yap all day, so he just wanted a barber to stay silent and cut his hair, plain and simple.
However, as the video host (a wise, middle-aged black man) pointed out, the chatter and camaraderie found at many traditional barber shops was an integral part of the whole social and cultural experience. It made sad to see this brand of community dying out.
And it also got me wondering what other people are doing about getting their hair cut.
I normally post "Let's Have a Controversial Conversation" threads in the Family Forum, and while everyone is welcome to answer this thread, I'm especially interested in what singles think about getting their hair cut.
For many of us singles, this is the only times another human being has physical contact with us. And no, I'm certainly not trying to make this into something weird or perverse, but I know for me, it can feel very strange to have someone get close enough to touch my hair -- which is why I prefer to keep going back to a hairdresser I'm comfortable with.
I always choose to go to a female hairdresser. I did go to a Supercuts-type place and was given a male hairdresser years ago, and it felt strange. Not because I somehow don't trust men and definitely not because I don't like men (some of my best friends are men!), but touching my hair feels very personal, and so I have a "regular" gal that I go to. Because I've gotten to know and trust her, I now find getting my hair washed and cut to be very relaxing.
Does anyone else feel the same way? Maybe it's just me. But does anyone else find getting their hair done a little a little bit uncomfortable, because it's close contact you're not used to?
And since haircuts have become outrageously expensive, I'm really interested in hearing what other people are doing.
* How much do you generally pay for a haircut/color/style, and how often? Do you do your hair yourself, or do you have someone else do it for free? Do you have any recommendations for bargains on haircuts? (I've always heard beauty colleges are cheap because students need someone to practice one, but have never lived near one to check it out.)
* Do you prefer to go to a male or female stylist? Any particular reason?
* Do you have to make an appointment, or do you find appointments to be a hassle?
* Do you feel uncomfortable at all with someone, especially a stranger, touching your hair?
* Do you prefer a chatty stylist, or one who won't say a word?
Getting our hair done can seem like a rather mundane part of life -- but I'm very interested in the different experiences, costs, and opinions people have about how it should go.
So I learned how to do it myself. I bought a decent set of clippers that came with an instructional VCR video and that video was very thorough. I messed up a few times, (just accidentally shaved off a little too much in one spot) but now I'm really glad I can do it myself.
When I did pay for haircuts there was one lady who I always requested because she was the only one who cut my hair the way I liked it, but she retired after a few years. She didn't say much except ask how I've been and maybe talk about the weather. After her, the women who cut my hair didn't say much either, and I'm not much of a talker. I'm the quiet type. So there's that.
The clippers came with instructions that you play in a VCR... So, very long ago... And the clippers are still running?
That's the most impressive part. Now I want me some of those clippers.
Up until I was a ceartain teen age, my mom would always keep me in a continual buzzcut.Hey Everyone,
I enjoy listening to a few social commentary channels on YouTube, and one of the latest topics has been about barber shops. The first wave of commentary was about how some barbers are charging $100 a cut because they say their skills are worth it, with owners saying they were providing a first-rate, luxury experience at their shops.
Then came the inevitable fallout, with footage of now-empty shops. Former customers said there was no way they were paying that kind of money for a cut, and many men stated several reasons things they didn't like about "modern" barber shops.
Two things that stood out to me was when they said they didn't like having to make appointments (I guess traditional barber shops were mostly walk-in's?) As a woman, I've almost always made appointments for haircuts, unless I just stopped into a place like Supercuts on a whim. And the second thing was that some of the younger men said they didn't like barbers who talked during the entire cut. One young man said he had to listen to people yap all day, so he just wanted a barber to stay silent and cut his hair, plain and simple.
However, as the video host (a wise, middle-aged black man) pointed out, the chatter and camaraderie found at many traditional barber shops was an integral part of the whole social and cultural experience. It made sad to see this brand of community dying out.
And it also got me wondering what other people are doing about getting their hair cut.
I normally post "Let's Have a Controversial Conversation" threads in the Family Forum, and while everyone is welcome to answer this thread, I'm especially interested in what singles think about getting their hair cut.
For many of us singles, this is the only times another human being has physical contact with us. And no, I'm certainly not trying to make this into something weird or perverse, but I know for me, it can feel very strange to have someone get close enough to touch my hair -- which is why I prefer to keep going back to a hairdresser I'm comfortable with.
I always choose to go to a female hairdresser. I did go to a Supercuts-type place and was given a male hairdresser years ago, and it felt strange. Not because I somehow don't trust men and definitely not because I don't like men (some of my best friends are men!), but touching my hair feels very personal, and so I have a "regular" gal that I go to. Because I've gotten to know and trust her, I now find getting my hair washed and cut to be very relaxing.
Does anyone else feel the same way? Maybe it's just me. But does anyone else find getting their hair done a little a little bit uncomfortable, because it's close contact you're not used to?
And since haircuts have become outrageously expensive, I'm really interested in hearing what other people are doing.
* How much do you generally pay for a haircut/color/style, and how often? Do you do your hair yourself, or do you have someone else do it for free? Do you have any recommendations for bargains on haircuts? (I've always heard beauty colleges are cheap because students need someone to practice one, but have never lived near one to check it out.)
* Do you prefer to go to a male or female stylist? Any particular reason?
* Do you have to make an appointment, or do you find appointments to be a hassle?
* Do you feel uncomfortable at all with someone, especially a stranger, touching your hair?
* Do you prefer a chatty stylist, or one who won't say a word?
Getting our hair done can seem like a rather mundane part of life -- but I'm very interested in the different experiences, costs, and opinions people have about how it should go.
Then I decided to stop letting her cut my hair, and just let it grow out as long as it could. (I did let her buzzcut me one time again after it was long, but decided I hated the look.)
For an unmeasured amount of years my head hair has just been growing, and I haven't looked back or sought to cut it, no matter how annoying it gets.
I also used to make my face clean shaven up until my last [great-household-ark-over-the-flood-wife-hope-thought-lover-and-forever-freind-but-just-in-over-my-head] departed from me, so I just stopped shaving altogether and let that grow into the barely managed scraggly mess it is today.
I used to encounter girls who wanted to touch my hair, and I never thought anything strange about it, (but I did enjoy the attention, and the thought that I satisfied that same kind of urge to pet a cute animal for someone.)
I'd wish if I did go to a stylist, I would be able to chat with them... and then again, I don't know what I would say. My life is strange.
If they always made stuff as right as they did the first time, wicked men would not be able to exploit consumers for a continual profit.
I was also going to add, "That's why millenial-age tech has gone the way of a man who was disloyal to the CCP", but the time to edit expired. I daubled on whather I should leave this post as it is, but it's better with the punchline.
About how some people might not like a talkative barber/hairdresser, I think it depends on introvert and extrovert. However, could also be our modern day, where young people are only interested in digital human interactions and entertainment and find something like chatting with real people annoying.
For my visits to a hairdresser, I like to bring in pictures of hairstyle concepts and share them to who will be doing my hair. I like going into detail about what I want. After that, I do like a stylist who talks a bit, since I don't like awkward silence, however I'm not much of a talker myself so I don't really like a lot of back and forth conversing.
When it comes to close interactions, I think getting my hair done is just a form of social exposure for an introvert, and with enough exposure and interaction anything can become ok and normal.
To your questions.....
* How much do you generally pay for a haircut/color/style, and how often?
Just whatever the standard rate is for basic styling, but I haven't had a haircut in a while. I was letting it grow long just for the experience of very long wavy hair. I plan to get it cut later this year though, which is why a haircut topic interested me.
* Do you prefer to go to a male or female stylist? Any particular reason?
I prefer a Female hairdresser. Sort of for your reason, I am single and I'm not sure about mens hands interacting with my head.
* Do you have to make an appointment, or do you find appointments to be a hassle?
I used to do walkins, but my haircuts used to take kind of long so I started doing appointments to be fair to the stylists.
* Do you feel uncomfortable at all with someone, especially a stranger, touching your hair?
I don't feel uncomfortable socially, but I am the one who tends to be a bit of an awkward person, so interactions don't always seem smooth and normal.
* Do you prefer a chatty stylist, or one who won't say a word?
If the stylist has considerate manners and a happy charisma, I don't mind them talking. If I don't really like the stylist then I prefer to just have them focus on my hair and I hope to walk out with something that looks nice.
I however, am not picky of needing the same stylist each time. I have had good and bad stylists. I certainly felt troubled by bad end results, but not all results have been bad. I would have missed out on meeting nice stylists and experiencing different talents and comparing my hairstyles, not of one being better over the other, but to see end results and how each one was a little different in good ways.
I honestly though, don't get my hair done often enough to decide if I would want to pick a favorite and try to become a regular somewhere.
For my visits to a hairdresser, I like to bring in pictures of hairstyle concepts and share them to who will be doing my hair. I like going into detail about what I want. After that, I do like a stylist who talks a bit, since I don't like awkward silence, however I'm not much of a talker myself so I don't really like a lot of back and forth conversing.
When it comes to close interactions, I think getting my hair done is just a form of social exposure for an introvert, and with enough exposure and interaction anything can become ok and normal.
To your questions.....
* How much do you generally pay for a haircut/color/style, and how often?
Just whatever the standard rate is for basic styling, but I haven't had a haircut in a while. I was letting it grow long just for the experience of very long wavy hair. I plan to get it cut later this year though, which is why a haircut topic interested me.
* Do you prefer to go to a male or female stylist? Any particular reason?
I prefer a Female hairdresser. Sort of for your reason, I am single and I'm not sure about mens hands interacting with my head.
* Do you have to make an appointment, or do you find appointments to be a hassle?
I used to do walkins, but my haircuts used to take kind of long so I started doing appointments to be fair to the stylists.
* Do you feel uncomfortable at all with someone, especially a stranger, touching your hair?
I don't feel uncomfortable socially, but I am the one who tends to be a bit of an awkward person, so interactions don't always seem smooth and normal.
* Do you prefer a chatty stylist, or one who won't say a word?
If the stylist has considerate manners and a happy charisma, I don't mind them talking. If I don't really like the stylist then I prefer to just have them focus on my hair and I hope to walk out with something that looks nice.
I however, am not picky of needing the same stylist each time. I have had good and bad stylists. I certainly felt troubled by bad end results, but not all results have been bad. I would have missed out on meeting nice stylists and experiencing different talents and comparing my hairstyles, not of one being better over the other, but to see end results and how each one was a little different in good ways.
I honestly though, don't get my hair done often enough to decide if I would want to pick a favorite and try to become a regular somewhere.
".....when i tell them exactly....." so true. almost every time i get a haircut, i do not get what i wanted. my wife cuts my hair often. thank Jesus for that! what beauticians will do is develop an idea how they think your hair should be cut & that's what you get.
Interesting subject. My dad used to take my brother and I to a barbershop when we were kids, obviously walk-in. Since we were kids the barber didn't talk to us much, but they often talked to the patrons. I think it just depends on the customer.* How much do you generally pay for a haircut/color/style, and how often? Do you do your hair yourself, or do you have someone else do it for free? Do you have any recommendations for bargains on haircuts? (I've always heard beauty colleges are cheap because students need someone to practice one, but have never lived near one to check it out.)
* Do you prefer to go to a male or female stylist? Any particular reason?
* Do you have to make an appointment, or do you find appointments to be a hassle?
* Do you feel uncomfortable at all with someone, especially a stranger, touching your hair?
* Do you prefer a chatty stylist, or one who won't say a word?
Getting our hair done can seem like a rather mundane part of life -- but I'm very interested in the different experiences, costs, and opinions people have about how it should go.
I cut my own hair with clippers now. Mostly because I was sick of getting crappy hair cuts. When I went to stores like Supercuts (or whatever) they would usually do a poor job and not do what I asked.
The hair cutter would usually engage me in conversation. If the conversation was good it would continue. I think if I didn't want to talk I would close my eyes and give short answers and they would stop talking.
lolI think if I didn't want to talk I would close my eyes and give short answers and they would stop talking.
It'd never occurred to me that before that I can't imagine anyone has ever said, "What the hair! This looks like crap!" when the hairdresser gives them a mirror and asks, "what do you think?"
I hate going to the hairdresser so I don't . Learnt how to cut my own hair 
much less hassle .
much less hassle .
Yello..
Its been ages since I posted here, and I see Miss Seoulsearch is still soul searching, which is nice to know, so I thought I would answer as she always has such thought provoking posts.
Well funny thing is the church I used to go to had a hairdresser, she was great. She gave me church rates, so it was like only $40 for a cut and style. Then she moved away so I didn't have her anymore, I was sad and let my hair go a bit. We would chat about life, family and girly stuff.
Before that mum always cut my hair. I had a bob, it wasn't so bad as a bowl cut but was a bit boring, I had to have it short because I was useless at styling my own hair, and it was easier for my mum. I have asian hair so think black and dead straight. Any curls would just fall out at the end of the day and perming it was too much trouble. A chinese mother brandishing scissors you have to respect! We never talked while she cut my hair except for her saying 'sit still' in chinese and her trying not to cut my ears off. If I sat wrong my hair would turn out crooked so that was very important. Actually she was very good at my basic cut so was always my go-to plus she had the cheapest rate of all i.e FREE!
Mum was ill with cancer and she's passed now but I was in mourning for like 2 years where I didn't have my hair cut at all, and I had white hairs (partly genetic, partly cos I was so stressed out) and was putting henna in it so it was kind of brownish red orange. Like a tortoiseshell?! Kids thought it looked cool but that was just my funky amateur dye job. Then I stopped dyeing it and so it looked like half black and white (not grey) and grew long past my shoulders ...I looked a mess plus it had split ends. Yuck.
After she passed I had to get my life back together and she was gone, plus my church hairdresser had moved away so I had NOBODY! And I couldn't cut my own hair except chopping off split ends every time I found one. This became a nasty habit.
I finally decided to submit to an unknown hairdresser, plus I had the chinese tradition of NOT cutting hair while in mourning but I had a wedding to go to a couple of months after so something had to be done. I rocked up to the nearest hairdresser in the mall who offered me a deal on a walk-in, and this thai guy said I needed to dye my hair again so I could look younger. I thought why not and so he dyed my hair red. Maybe that was just the unused dye he had to get rid off and so at the wedding I was the ONLY one with red-pinkish hair in a sea of black haired Chinese relatives! arrgh
to be continued...
Its been ages since I posted here, and I see Miss Seoulsearch is still soul searching, which is nice to know, so I thought I would answer as she always has such thought provoking posts.
Well funny thing is the church I used to go to had a hairdresser, she was great. She gave me church rates, so it was like only $40 for a cut and style. Then she moved away so I didn't have her anymore, I was sad and let my hair go a bit. We would chat about life, family and girly stuff.
Before that mum always cut my hair. I had a bob, it wasn't so bad as a bowl cut but was a bit boring, I had to have it short because I was useless at styling my own hair, and it was easier for my mum. I have asian hair so think black and dead straight. Any curls would just fall out at the end of the day and perming it was too much trouble. A chinese mother brandishing scissors you have to respect! We never talked while she cut my hair except for her saying 'sit still' in chinese and her trying not to cut my ears off. If I sat wrong my hair would turn out crooked so that was very important. Actually she was very good at my basic cut so was always my go-to plus she had the cheapest rate of all i.e FREE!
Mum was ill with cancer and she's passed now but I was in mourning for like 2 years where I didn't have my hair cut at all, and I had white hairs (partly genetic, partly cos I was so stressed out) and was putting henna in it so it was kind of brownish red orange. Like a tortoiseshell?! Kids thought it looked cool but that was just my funky amateur dye job. Then I stopped dyeing it and so it looked like half black and white (not grey) and grew long past my shoulders ...I looked a mess plus it had split ends. Yuck.
After she passed I had to get my life back together and she was gone, plus my church hairdresser had moved away so I had NOBODY! And I couldn't cut my own hair except chopping off split ends every time I found one. This became a nasty habit.
I finally decided to submit to an unknown hairdresser, plus I had the chinese tradition of NOT cutting hair while in mourning but I had a wedding to go to a couple of months after so something had to be done. I rocked up to the nearest hairdresser in the mall who offered me a deal on a walk-in, and this thai guy said I needed to dye my hair again so I could look younger. I thought why not and so he dyed my hair red. Maybe that was just the unused dye he had to get rid off and so at the wedding I was the ONLY one with red-pinkish hair in a sea of black haired Chinese relatives! arrgh
to be continued...
Lanolin!!
Welcome back!!!
Glad to see you posting again!!
I'm very sorry to hear about your mum. I pray that God is comforting you and getting you through.
Are you still working at the library?
And I bet your red/pink hair rocked -- it sounds cool to me!
Aw well I didn't need to bleach it because it was already white. Ha. it just looked like I had highlights/lowlights.Lanolin!!
Welcome back!!!
Glad to see you posting again!!
I'm very sorry to hear about your mum. I pray that God is comforting you and getting you through.
Are you still working at the library?
And I bet your red/pink hair rocked -- it sounds cool to me!
Yea God is helping, although for a time I just didn't want to talk to Him about stuff. And I haven't been to church in a while. I thought I was ready but I was too upset and scared I was just going to ugly cry in church and the church I was going to had lots of elderly people who don't really go for that kind of emotion in a service. Especially for unbelieving parents anyway. I had to pretend to be happy at the funeral which was not a church one. But really I was just numb, and my christian praying friends were doing their best to comfort me but my family who are not just didn't know how to handle it apart from chinese tradition, which is like.. very weird to Christians because they(we?) think about the afterlife in a completeley different way...I'm a bit in between.
But I will say mum actually had a good life apart from suffering at the very end.
No I'm not still working at the library...that kind of took a back burner for a while. Also...honestly, didn't you hear that I got laid off, and actually fired from one. Drama!
Then I volunteered for a while but I had to deal with kid vandals who trashed the library so I gave it up.
I now just read books in peace without having to actually work in a library.
Then I volunteered for a while but I had to deal with kid vandals who trashed the library so I gave it up.
I now just read books in peace without having to actually work in a library.
Hi Seoul
You look too fine.
Braiding takes a lot of time. Sometimes you can sit for 4hrs. My mind cannot handle silence and loneliness for that long, so I am ready to get all the gist and gossip about people I know nothing about.
Saloons are gossip centers.
You look too fine.
Braiding takes a lot of time. Sometimes you can sit for 4hrs. My mind cannot handle silence and loneliness for that long, so I am ready to get all the gist and gossip about people I know nothing about.
Saloons are gossip centers.
Hey miss Lanolin, I ran across one of your old posts the other day and hoped you were doing alright. So sorry to hear about your Mum.
The best thing about grey streaks is you can dye them a fun color without having to bleach. So my midlife crisis only cost $7.99
Aw thanks SnackersMom and Seoul I missed you too. And all the singles peeps. Losing mum (mum's don't live forever on earth) was hard for me, as I was very close to her - so close that I could hear her talking in her sleep in the next room - or rather yelling in her sleep. I never knew what it was she was yelling about because it was all in Chinese. When I told her she talked in her sleep she asked me what she was saying and said I should record it. She would do this in hospital as well.Hey miss Lanolin, I ran across one of your old posts the other day and hoped you were doing alright. So sorry to hear about your Mum.
The best thing about grey streaks is you can dye them a fun color without having to bleach. So my midlife crisis only cost $7.99
For those wondering I wasn't banned....though I did post on the banned game thread. I just had a lot to deal with.
Anyway back to the topic of hair...the red dye thai guy tried to talk to me and to open up but I didn't feel like talking much that day and just sat back while he did my hair. Then that salon went out of business...so when I next went to the mall it wasn't there anymore. I had to go to a different one.
They could not understand what I wanted as I wasn't too happy with my cut - I wanted an undercut as my hair was annoying me and thinning out and also a bit of shape to it. I was going to have an Indian lady hairdresser who was free but she didn't want to do my hair and got me a Chinese lady. And she was great. We chatted away, at first I tried to speak Chinese but we ended up talking in English. She was from Shanghai. Her hair looked really good and even though she was a granny she looked so young. She had blonde hair but the dye job was really good.
So I am going to ask for her next time...I got her card and will book it in.
Can I add... who has been to a barber where they sing songs like a barbershop quartet???
The music they play in salons seems to vary. They seem to like ABBA a lot?!
Has anyone had an outrageous style like a mullet or mohawk, or an afro, or ...rainbow dyed?? And what did church people think?? Compliments or...what have you done to your hair??? Is it a wig?
The music they play in salons seems to vary. They seem to like ABBA a lot?!
Has anyone had an outrageous style like a mullet or mohawk, or an afro, or ...rainbow dyed?? And what did church people think?? Compliments or...what have you done to your hair??? Is it a wig?