How to love your family, when God hates the nonelects?

1 Timothy 2:3-4

New King James Version


3 For this is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior, 4 who desires all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth.

The idea that "The number of the elect is a number that is fixed and certain. It cannot increase or decrease" does not align with scripture and the God we serve. This drama is not set in stone. God has a master plan, yes, but all of us have free will to become a part of God's family if we desire.

and, you, of course, are one of the chosen, correct?

So God wants you to lie to them, by telling them Jesus died for them, and set them up with false hope because they are not the ones which have been chosen?

Heresy.

I use the term "Calvinism" for the traditional, non biblical concept of TULIP only part of Reformed theology. I agree with their Covenant theology and their non futurist view of eschatology that some hold.

see wikipedia.....
Calvinism

There are people on CC who adhere to TULIP as described on this Wikipedia page.

All Calvinists believe they are part of the "elect" group including their children. Though, part of the heresy of Calvinism is perseverance of the saints. If one does not persevere to the end, it only means they were not part of the elect to begin with. (I am using the word "elect" as a Calvinist would falsely use the term.)

Ben was a wise guy for sure.

No my friend.That speaks of two direct quotes from scripture.
Do you hate the truth so much that you will do anything to oppose it?
Jn6

37 All that the Father giveth me shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out.

39 And this is the Father's will which hath sent me, that of all which he hath given me I should lose nothing, but should raise it up again at the last day.

Chapter 17 Of the Perseverance of the Saints 1 Those whom God hath accepted in the beloved, effectually called and sanctified by his Spirit, and given the precious faith of his elect unto, can neither totally nor finally fall from the state of grace, a but shall certainly persevere therein to the end, and be eternally saved, seeing the gifts and callings of God are without repentance, whence he still begets and nourisheth in them faith, repentance, love, joy, hope, and all the graces of the Spirit unto immortality; and though many storms and floods arise and beat against them, yet they shall never be able to take them off that foundation and rock which by faith they are fastened upon; notwithstanding, through unbelief and the temptations of Satan, the sensible sight of the light and love of God may for a time be clouded and obscured from b them, yet he is still the same, c and they shall be sure to be kept by the power of God unto salvation, where they shall enjoy their purchased possession, they being engraven upon the palm of his hands, and their names having been written in the book of life from all eternity. ( a Joh 10:28-29; Phi 1:6; 2Ti 2:19; 1Jo 2:19; b Psa 89:31-32; 1Co 11:32; c Mal 3:6) 2 This perseverance of the saints depends not upon their own free will, but upon the immutability of the decree of d election, flowing from the free and unchangeable love of God the Father, upon the efficacy of the merit and intercession of Jesus Christ e and union with him, the f oath of God, the abiding of his Spirit, and the g seed of God within them, and the nature of the h covenant of grace; from all which ariseth also the certainty and infallibility thereof.

Chapter 18: Of the Assurance of Grace and Salvation
1._____ Although temporary believers, and other unregenerate men, may vainly deceive themselves with false hopes and carnal presumptions of being in the favour of God and state of salvation, which hope of theirs shall perish; yet such as truly believe in the Lord Jesus, and love him in sincerity, endeavouring to walk in all good conscience before him, may in this life be certainly assured that they are in the state of grace, and may rejoice in the hope of the glory of God, which hope shall never make them ashamed.
( Job 8:13, 14; Matthew 7:22, 23; 1 John 2:3; 1 John 3:14, 18, 19, 21, 24; 1 John 5:13; Romans 5:2, 5 )
2._____ This certainty is not a bare conjectural and probable persuasion grounded upon a fallible hope, but an infallible assurance of faith founded on the blood and righteousness of Christ revealed in the Gospel; and also upon the inward evidence of those graces of the Spirit unto which promises are made, and on the testimony of the Spirit of adoption, witnessing with our spirits that we are the children of God; and, as a fruit thereof, keeping the heart both humble and holy.
( Hebrews 6:11, 19; Hebrews 6:17, 18; 2 Peter 1:4, 5, 10, 11; Romans 8:15, 16; 1 John 3:1-3 )
3._____ This infallible assurance doth not so belong to the essence of faith, but that a true believer may wait long, and conflict with many difficulties before he be partaker of it; yet being enabled by the Spirit to know the things which are freely given him of God, he may, without extraordinary revelation, in the right use of means, attain thereunto: and therefore it is the duty of every one to give all diligence to make his calling and election sure, that thereby his heart may be enlarged in peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, in love and thankfulness to God, and in strength and cheerfulness in the duties of obedience, the proper fruits of this assurance; -so far is it from inclining men to looseness.
( Isaiah 50:10; Psalms 88; Psalms 77:1-12; 1 John 4:13; Hebrews 6:11, 12; Romans 5:1, 2, 5; Romans 14:17; Psalms 119:32; Romans 6:1,2; Titus 2:11, 12, 14 )
4._____ True believers may have the assurance of their salvation divers ways shaken, diminished, and intermitted; as by negligence in preserving of it, by falling into some special sin which woundeth the conscience and grieveth the Spirit; by some sudden or vehement temptation, by God's withdrawing the light of his countenance, and suffering even such as fear him to walk in darkness and to have no light, yet are they never destitute of the seed of God and life of faith, that love of Christ and the brethren, that sincerity of heart and conscience of duty out of which, by the operation of the Spirit, this assurance may in due time be revived, and by the which, in the meantime, they are preserved from utter despair.
( Canticles 5:2, 3, 6; Psalms 51:8, 12, 14; Psalms 116:11; Psalms 77:7, 8; Psalms 31:22; Psalms 30:7; 1 John 3:9; Luke 22:32; Psalms 42:5, 11; Lamentations 3:26-31 )

I wonder what is a false believer?

I do not lie and tell them that Jesus died for them, or Jesus loves them.

I can tell them biblically That the Lord Jesus Christ has died for sinners.

I can tell them that the love of God is only found IN CHRIST, not apart from Him.

To remain apart from Jesus is to remain in the realm of death.

A false believer is described in the bible in several places. here is one that is very clear:
1Cor15:

1 Moreover, brethren, I declare unto you the gospel which I preached unto you, which also ye have received, and wherein ye stand;
2 By which also ye are saved, if ye keep in memory what I preached unto you, unless ye have believed in vain.

A false believer believes in the strength of his own flesh, to no purpose, like those in Mt.7:21-24
21 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.
22 Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works?
23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.
24 Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:

Nice dodge.

Now please answer my question.

Who is the audience? Was this post resurrection under grace? Who is Jesus talking about? Gentiles? Disciples? Jews?

Taking a couple of scriptures out of context is not good bible study.

Let's try this again. It's a simple question. Can you know without a shadow of a doubt you are saved and going to heaven. Yes or No?! A Sunday school child can answer this.

I would postulate that in the 2000 years since Jesus left this world to be back with the Father, that there have been WAY more than 144,000 people that have fit that definition of yours.
Therefore, I believe you are not one of them. The boat was filled long ago. It has sailed. You weren't on it. Sorry.....

But, if you read and understand the scriptures correctly.... you still have hope. Jesus came to save you, and me, and everyone else that believes in him, and receives the free gift of salvation.

That is a non-believer not a false believer for Matthew.
The other verses are to believers who are doubting because of false teachers.
There is no such thing as a false believer that is contradictory.