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T

TheWriter

Guest
#1
#1
What, what?
What do you feel is a better trait for a partner in life.

Since this is the singles forum, Let’s get something discussed about what you personally like as a trait in a partner aka bf/gf.

I will go first,

1) Must love God
2) love family
3) Supportive with ideas, and giving constructive criticism and advice to get the better result
4) Must love God more than me

Apperances? Not too worried about that as long as her heart matches her walk. You can tell a lot about someone about how they carry themselves.
 
G

Gojira

Guest
#2
#2
TheWriter said:
What, what?
What do you feel is a better trait for a partner in life.

Since this is the singles forum, Let’s get something discussed about what you personally like as a trait in a partner aka bf/gf.

I will go first,

1) Must love God
2) love family
3) Supportive with ideas, and giving constructive criticism and advice to get the better result
4) Must love God more than me

Apperances? Not too worried about that as long as her heart matches her walk. You can tell a lot about someone about how they carry themselves.
Click to expand...
1. Gotta be a Christian, first and foremost. Need to be spiritually aligned.

2. We must be politically aligned.

3. She must be Biblically single.

4. We must share a mutual attraction, physical and otherwise (I generally prefer Asian / Latin / Mediterranean, but there have been exceptions for sure).

5. She must be sane. We all carry baggage, but some moreso than others.

6. At least some common interests are important.

7. I would like it -- though this is not a deal-breaker -- if she could cook.
 
T

TheWriter

Guest
#3
#3
men like a woman to cook yes. But what is a woman likes a man to cook as well or even clean the dishes after she cooks?
mutual respect is everything within relationships.

not saying you would not have respect, just stating my thoughts.

it is the same as investing. If a woman is willing to invest time to cook for you, what would you do to invest time in her?

a man finds greatness when a woman invests in them. Trust me all men love attention from a woman lol it comes natural. But it is how you deal with that attention that keeps her attraction to you.
 
EternalFire

EternalFire

Well-known member
#4
Jan 3, 2019
658
351
63
#4
Great topic!

It’s vitally important to know the scriptural requirements for a potential spouse.

Separating these non-negotiables from preferences is likewise needed.

I get the general sentiment of your thread, but I’m not sure what is meant by “better trait.”

Can you also explain what you mean by “must love God more than me”?
 
MsMediator

MsMediator

Well-known member
#5
Mar 8, 2022
1,083
724
113
#5
I generally agree with the above lists. One more thing is that I wouldn't want a spouse to be too clingy. However, I admit there is a fine line between being in love and being clingy...but being clingy seems similar to controlling to me.
 
J

Joshua_783

Active member
#6
Sep 15, 2022
207
113
43
#6
MsMediator said:
I generally agree with the above lists. One more thing is that I wouldn't want a spouse to be too clingy. However, I admit there is a fine line between being in love and being clingy...but being clingy seems similar to controlling to me.
Click to expand...
MsMediator, So do you mean you wouldn’t want a spouse to hold you or be close to you when you are both sleeping? Would you put a line down the centre of the bed? 😉
 
J

Joshua_783

Active member
#7
Sep 15, 2022
207
113
43
#7
Joshua_783 said:
MsMediator, So do you mean you wouldn’t want a spouse to hold you or be close to you when you are both sleeping? Would you put a line down the centre of the bed? 😉
Click to expand...
Or would you steal the sheets and blankets off your spouse?? 🙃
 
MsMediator

MsMediator

Well-known member
#8
Mar 8, 2022
1,083
724
113
#8
Joshua_783 said:
MsMediator, So do you mean you wouldn’t want a spouse to hold you or be close to you when you are both sleeping? Would you put a line down the centre of the bed? 😉
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That is fine. However, I find some couples put up a front by showing PDA which I think is clingy, like if they guy puts his arm around the woman. Sometimes the timing of the PDA is not coincidental.

What I meant is always wanting to hang out with the spouse.
 
G

Gojira

Guest
#10
#10
TheWriter said:
men like a woman to cook yes. But what is a woman likes a man to cook as well or even clean the dishes after she cooks?
mutual respect is everything within relationships.

not saying you would not have respect, just stating my thoughts.

it is the same as investing. If a woman is willing to invest time to cook for you, what would you do to invest time in her?

a man finds greatness when a woman invests in them. Trust me all men love attention from a woman lol it comes natural. But it is how you deal with that attention that keeps her attraction to you.
Click to expand...
You asked what traits we would find appealing in a mate, not what traits we felt we needed to provide.
 
T

TheWriter

Guest
#11
#11
Gojira said:
You asked what traits we would find appealing in a mate, not what traits we felt we needed to provide.
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i know 😁 was meant to make you think not offend.
 
T

TheWriter

Guest
#12
#12
EternalFire said:
Great topic!

It’s vitally important to know the scriptural requirements for a potential spouse.

Separating these non-negotiables from preferences is likewise needed.

I get the general sentiment of your thread, but I’m not sure what is meant by “better trait.”

Can you also explain what you mean by “must love God more than me”?
Click to expand...
Better trait to me is the same as what makes a person appeal to your heart far more than the rest 🙂
 
T

TheWriter

Guest
#14
#14
Gojira said:
uh huh...
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I’m being honest it was not my intent. When you know what you want out of a relationship what are you planning to do to keep that spark alive. Same with her what does she need to do to keep your interest
 
T

TheWriter

Guest
#15
#15
Gojira said:
uh huh...
Click to expand...
Brother,

It takes work on both ends. You had answered my question to perfection because it is what you value. I asked another, it may had came off wrong in that I apologize.

We all have things that we value most, those values are important yes but in a lot of ways we got to stand by what we admire which are those very values because it is what makes our own heart tick.
 
T

TheWriter

Guest
#16
#16
EternalFire said:
Great topic!

It’s vitally important to know the scriptural requirements for a potential spouse.

Separating these non-negotiables from preferences is likewise needed.

I get the general sentiment of your thread, but I’m not sure what is meant by “better trait.”

Can you also explain what you mean by “must love God more than me”?
Click to expand...
To love God more than me is to love God regardless of what can happen between the two of us.

If she loves God more than me, it means that is her prime focus and that God is the one that holds that throne of her heart.

In alot of ways to allow God to be number one in her own life without making everything about one person 🙂
 
EternalFire

EternalFire

Well-known member
#17
Jan 3, 2019
658
351
63
#17
TheWriter said:
Better trait to me is the same as what makes a person appeal to your heart far more than the rest 🙂
Click to expand...
Thanks for the clarification.

It sounds to me like you mean personal preference when using the term "better trait."

At the same time, it also seems to be deeper than something like an individual preferring someone with red hair over brown because you tie it to appealing to the heart.

Am I on the right track?
 
T

TheWriter

Guest
#18
#18
EternalFire said:
Thanks for the clarification.

It sounds to me like you mean personal preference when using the term "better trait."

At the same time, it also seems to be deeper than something like an individual preferring someone with red hair over brown because you tie it to appealing to the heart.

Am I on the right track?
Click to expand...
💯
 
T

TheWriter

Guest
#19
#19
EternalFire said:
Thanks for the clarification.

It sounds to me like you mean personal preference when using the term "better trait."

At the same time, it also seems to be deeper than something like an individual preferring someone with red hair over brown because you tie it to appealing to the heart.

Am I on the right track?
Click to expand...
When you love a person for their heart, then appearances have no match. Just as God looks at the heart of the person which determines their motives.
 
T

TheWriter

Guest
#20
#20
EternalFire said:
Thanks for the clarification.

It sounds to me like you mean personal preference when using the term "better trait."

At the same time, it also seems to be deeper than something like an individual preferring someone with red hair over brown because you tie it to appealing to the heart.

Am I on the right track?
Click to expand...
Last one sorry lol

even when a woman or man’s heart is more focused on God then you know their intentions for you are real and chances are God had brought you two together because you both love God deeply that nothing in this world can change that…. Not even a partner
 
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