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Dec 7, 2022
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#1
Hi everyone. God introduced Himself to me when I was eighteen years of age. I am now 66. I say introduce Himself because while a neighborhood friend and I were walking across the nearly 200 yards long church grounds of the church we been raised in, and subsequently left at the age of consent, a cloud formation suddenly appeared directly above us in what was as near perfect as clouds allow, the depiction of the three crosses of Calvary. Yes, in what had been a beautiful cloudless early summer afternoon, suddenly there appears three crosses of cloud, the center the larger with two smaller, one on either end. What did I do? I freaked! I desperately searched the sky hoping to either hear the engine or see the plane responsible for creating this unwelcomed event while all along fearful that there was something far more powerful behind this. Then I felt His presence surround me. Why me? The memory of the abuse I grew up in through childhood doesn't necessarily remind me of what one might picture from some newspaper headline, but then again it was enough to destroy my life and steal away from me any understanding of relating to humanity in any real sense of being accepted or belonging anywhere in society. Most of my life all I knew to believe was that I was worthless, unwanted, unloved and had absolutely no right whatsoever to think I deserved any acceptance. Why did God introduce Himself to me in these clouds. I have come to accept that it was going to take something of that magnitude to hold me through the many difficult years of internal suffering that would await me, I guess until God could break through with my first true understanding that love actually existed even for me, which came roughly about thirty five years later. I don't suspect I shall ever be like most of you who at least have some inkling of who you are or where you belong in this world, yet I have been given at least an understanding that we're all family in Christ regardless of our backgrounds.
 
N

notonmywatch

Guest
#2
Hi everyone. God introduced Himself to me when I was eighteen years of age. I am now 66. I say introduce Himself because while a neighborhood friend and I were walking across the nearly 200 yards long church grounds of the church we been raised in, and subsequently left at the age of consent, a cloud formation suddenly appeared directly above us in what was as near perfect as clouds allow, the depiction of the three crosses of Calvary. Yes, in what had been a beautiful cloudless early summer afternoon, suddenly there appears three crosses of cloud, the center the larger with two smaller, one on either end. What did I do? I freaked! I desperately searched the sky hoping to either hear the engine or see the plane responsible for creating this unwelcomed event while all along fearful that there was something far more powerful behind this. Then I felt His presence surround me. Why me? The memory of the abuse I grew up in through childhood doesn't necessarily remind me of what one might picture from some newspaper headline, but then again it was enough to destroy my life and steal away from me any understanding of relating to humanity in any real sense of being accepted or belonging anywhere in society. Most of my life all I knew to believe was that I was worthless, unwanted, unloved and had absolutely no right whatsoever to think I deserved any acceptance. Why did God introduce Himself to me in these clouds. I have come to accept that it was going to take something of that magnitude to hold me through the many difficult years of internal suffering that would await me, I guess until God could break through with my first true understanding that love actually existed even for me, which came roughly about thirty five years later. I don't suspect I shall ever be like most of you who at least have some inkling of who you are or where you belong in this world, yet I have been given at least an understanding that we're all family in Christ regardless of our backgrounds.
Welcome, and thanks for sharing some of your background story with us.
 

Isny

Senior Member
Jan 15, 2017
2,539
2,646
113
#3
"....we're all family in Christ regardless of our backgrounds"....so true. Look through the forums and join in on the discussions. You soon may have made many friends and find that you have a second family here. Welcome! :)
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
59,909
29,289
113
#6

Hebrews 13:14~ This world is not our home; we are looking forward to our everlasting home in heaven.
There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain
:)
 

MrE

Active member
Jan 26, 2023
169
98
28
#7
Hi everyone. God introduced Himself to me when I was eighteen years of age. I am now 66. I say introduce Himself because while a neighborhood friend and I were walking across the nearly 200 yards long church grounds of the church we been raised in, and subsequently left at the age of consent, a cloud formation suddenly appeared directly above us in what was as near perfect as clouds allow, the depiction of the three crosses of Calvary. Yes, in what had been a beautiful cloudless early summer afternoon, suddenly there appears three crosses of cloud, the center the larger with two smaller, one on either end. What did I do? I freaked! I desperately searched the sky hoping to either hear the engine or see the plane responsible for creating this unwelcomed event while all along fearful that there was something far more powerful behind this. Then I felt His presence surround me. Why me? The memory of the abuse I grew up in through childhood doesn't necessarily remind me of what one might picture from some newspaper headline, but then again it was enough to destroy my life and steal away from me any understanding of relating to humanity in any real sense of being accepted or belonging anywhere in society. Most of my life all I knew to believe was that I was worthless, unwanted, unloved and had absolutely no right whatsoever to think I deserved any acceptance. Why did God introduce Himself to me in these clouds. I have come to accept that it was going to take something of that magnitude to hold me through the many difficult years of internal suffering that would await me, I guess until God could break through with my first true understanding that love actually existed even for me, which came roughly about thirty five years later. I don't suspect I shall ever be like most of you who at least have some inkling of who you are or where you belong in this world, yet I have been given at least an understanding that we're all family in Christ regardless of our backgrounds.
Nice to meet you.
 
Dec 7, 2022
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#8
I thank you for the kindness, but don't be surprised at my holding back. A lot to healin left to go here.
 

Papermonkey

Active member
Dec 2, 2022
724
257
43
#10
Hi everyone. God introduced Himself to me when I was eighteen years of age. I am now 66. I say introduce Himself because while a neighborhood friend and I were walking across the nearly 200 yards long church grounds of the church we been raised in, and subsequently left at the age of consent, a cloud formation suddenly appeared directly above us in what was as near perfect as clouds allow, the depiction of the three crosses of Calvary. Yes, in what had been a beautiful cloudless early summer afternoon, suddenly there appears three crosses of cloud, the center the larger with two smaller, one on either end. What did I do? I freaked! I desperately searched the sky hoping to either hear the engine or see the plane responsible for creating this unwelcomed event while all along fearful that there was something far more powerful behind this. Then I felt His presence surround me. Why me? The memory of the abuse I grew up in through childhood doesn't necessarily remind me of what one might picture from some newspaper headline, but then again it was enough to destroy my life and steal away from me any understanding of relating to humanity in any real sense of being accepted or belonging anywhere in society. Most of my life all I knew to believe was that I was worthless, unwanted, unloved and had absolutely no right whatsoever to think I deserved any acceptance. Why did God introduce Himself to me in these clouds. I have come to accept that it was going to take something of that magnitude to hold me through the many difficult years of internal suffering that would await me, I guess until God could break through with my first true understanding that love actually existed even for me, which came roughly about thirty five years later. I don't suspect I shall ever be like most of you who at least have some inkling of who you are or where you belong in this world, yet I have been given at least an understanding that we're all family in Christ regardless of our backgrounds.
That's quite a testimony. :) Welcome.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
59,909
29,289
113
#11
I thank you for the kindness, but don't be surprised at my holding back. A lot to healin left to go here.
Your user name brings this John Michael Talbot song to mind from his The Lover
and the Beloved
LP; words from Saint John of the Cross' One Dark Night :)

 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
59,909
29,289
113
#13

Loreena McKennitt (a Canadian artist) also did this Dark Night
of the Soul
based on the text of Saint John of the Cross :)
 
Dec 7, 2022
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#14
Your user name brings this John Michael Talbot song to mind from his The Lover
and the Beloved
LP; words from Saint John of the Cross' One Dark Night:)

I had not heard the John Michael Talbot song One Dark Night you refer to until this very moment and will most likely have to listen to it several times to grasp it's meaning, though have enjoyed John Michael and Terry Talbot's talent since way back with the Mason Proffit Band, though particularly favor John Michael's first three Christian solo recordings.
 

GRACE_ambassador

Well-known member
Feb 22, 2021
3,205
1,609
113
Midwest
#15
I have come to accept that it was going to take something of that magnitude to hold me through the many difficult years of internal suffering that would await me, I guess until God could break through with my first true understanding that love actually existed even for me, which came roughly about thirty five years later. I don't suspect I shall ever be like most of you who at least have some inkling of who you are or where you belong in this world, yet I have been given at least an understanding that we're all family in Christ regardless of our backgrounds.
Precious friend, A Very Warm Welcome To Chat. Thanks for sharing - this may be helpful for 'internal suffering' and 'A lot to healing left to go here.':

GRACE Word for our infirmities

Don't feel bad; I too am Very s-l-o-w, as it took me 10 years to study/understand
what is in these 3 links below, before I shared them with someone else.

Please Be Very RICHLY Encouraged And Edified In
The LORD JESUS CHRIST, And His Word Of Truth, Rightly
Divided
(+ I and II).

Grace, Peace, And JOY!...
 

TabinRivCA

Well-known member
Oct 23, 2018
13,063
10,629
113
#16
Nice to meet you and your Intro reminds me somewhat of Joyce Meyer who overcame abuse as a child from her dad. She now has a world-wide ministry. Glad you are here and may God bless & keep you!
 

Seeker47

Well-known member
Aug 7, 2018
1,114
956
113
#18
Welcome and thank you for sharing your encouraging story. Subtle abuse presents some unique and very difficult issues. Sometimes we struggle for years over our relationship with the abuser. Subtle abuse is also easy to hide. We avoid confronting the abuse head-on, but then internalize the effects and suffer needlessly much longer than we should.

But we have a God that knows us even when we hide, who loves us even when we don't, and who never stops encouraging and healing.

You have a unique perspective to share. I pray you find the courage to say who you are and to tell us where you belong. It will be a beacon of light for someone else.
 

oyster67

Senior Member
May 24, 2014
11,887
8,705
113
#20
Hi everyone. God introduced Himself to me when I was eighteen years of age. I am now 66. I say introduce Himself because while a neighborhood friend and I were walking across the nearly 200 yards long church grounds of the church we been raised in, and subsequently left at the age of consent, a cloud formation suddenly appeared directly above us in what was as near perfect as clouds allow, the depiction of the three crosses of Calvary. Yes, in what had been a beautiful cloudless early summer afternoon, suddenly there appears three crosses of cloud, the center the larger with two smaller, one on either end. What did I do? I freaked! I desperately searched the sky hoping to either hear the engine or see the plane responsible for creating this unwelcomed event while all along fearful that there was something far more powerful behind this. Then I felt His presence surround me. Why me? The memory of the abuse I grew up in through childhood doesn't necessarily remind me of what one might picture from some newspaper headline, but then again it was enough to destroy my life and steal away from me any understanding of relating to humanity in any real sense of being accepted or belonging anywhere in society. Most of my life all I knew to believe was that I was worthless, unwanted, unloved and had absolutely no right whatsoever to think I deserved any acceptance. Why did God introduce Himself to me in these clouds. I have come to accept that it was going to take something of that magnitude to hold me through the many difficult years of internal suffering that would await me, I guess until God could break through with my first true understanding that love actually existed even for me, which came roughly about thirty five years later. I don't suspect I shall ever be like most of you who at least have some inkling of who you are or where you belong in this world, yet I have been given at least an understanding that we're all family in Christ regardless of our backgrounds.
Thank you so much for sharing, dear brother. God will make all things right and equal very soon. (y)
A warm welcome to CC. :):coffee: