The key point you don’t seem to be grasping, because it doesn’t help you to address it, is that Sodom and Gomorrah were reduced to ashes as an example of what will happen to ungodly people. As you’re well aware of, it’s rare that an ungodly person dies a physical death where they are reduced to ashes on Earth.
When the Bible says the wicked will be reduced to mere ashes, it means it’s talking about destroying them with fire. That’s what the second death is. And they will not live forever in any sense in hell.
Read it again. 2 Peter and Jude are talking about the same thing.
4For if God didn’t spare
a the angels who sinned but cast them into hell
a b and delivered them in chains
B of utter darkness to be kept for judgment;
c 5and if he didn’t spare the ancient world, but protected Noah,
a a preacher of righteousness, and seven others,
a b when he brought the flood on the world of the ungodly;
6and if he reduced the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah
a to ashes and condemned them to extinction,
A making them an example of what is coming to the ungodly;
B b 7and if he rescued righteous Lot,
a distressed by the depraved behavior of the immoral
8(for as that righteous man lived among them day by day, his righteous soul was tormented by the lawless deeds he saw and heard
a) —
9then the Lord knows how to rescue
a the godly from trials
and to keep the unrighteous under punishment for the day of judgment,b
3Above all, be aware of this: Scoffers will come in the last days
a scoffing and following their own evil desires,
4saying, “Where is his ‘coming’ that he promised?
a Ever since our ancestors fell asleep,
b all things continue as they have been since the beginning of creation.”
5They deliberately overlook this: By the word of God
a the heavens came into being long ago and the earth was brought about from water and through water.
b 6Through these the world of that time perished when it was flooded.
a 7By the same word,
a the present heavens and earth
are stored up for fire, being kept for the day of judgmentb and destruction of the ungodly.
8Dear friends, don’t overlook this one fact: With the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day.
a 9The Lord does not delay his promise,
a as some understand delay, but is patient with you, not wanting any
b to perish
c but all to come to repentance.
d
10But the day of the Lord
a will come like a thief;
a b on that day the heavens will pass away
c with a loud noise, the elements will burn and be dissolved,
d and the earth and the works on it will be disclosed.
B C 11Since all these things are to be dissolved in this way, it is clear what sort of people you should be in holy conduct and godliness
12as you wait for the day of God and hasten its coming.
a a Because of that day, the heavens will be dissolved with fire and the elements will melt with heat.
13But based on his promise, we wait for new heavens and a new earth,
a where righteousness dwells.
b
5Now I want to remind you, although you came to know all these things once and for all, that Jesus
A saved a people out of Egypt and later destroyed those who did not believe;
a 6and the angels
a who did not keep their own position but abandoned their proper dwelling,
he has kept in eternal chains in deep darkness for the judgment on the great day. 7Likewise, Sodom and Gomorrah
a and the surrounding towns committed sexual immorality and perversions,
A and serve as an example by undergoing the punishment of eternal fire.
b
The wicked dead are reserved in hell waiting for the judgment of eternal fire in the Lake of Fire.