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Peter

New member
May 26, 2022
1
1
3
#1
This is my first visit to this site. My name is Peter, I'm 36 and I live in Ireland. I'm struggling a lot with life, sin, and my faith. I was raised in a non-religious household but went to Catholic school, and never really heard the true message of the Gospel until I was 18. That's when I met some evangelical Christians who explained to me what it means to be saved by grace through the death and resurrection of Jesus. Not long after, when I was alone I reached out to God and I accepted Jesus as my saviour.

Since that time I have struggled a lot with everything in life. My faith weakened over time and I continued to sin and do whatever felt good without care for what God wanted. In 2010, I was diagnosed with an incurable autoimmune disease that causes the bones in my spine and joints to become inflamed and fuse together over time and causes a hunched back. This resulted in a reduction in my mobility and constant pain. A few years later I was diagnosed with cancer. I needed an operation to remove the tumour, but thankfully I did not need further treatment, the cancer had not spread, it was discovered early enough. Regardless, it was still a shocking experience that I still think about every day.

These were not problems that I expected to deal with before I turned 30 when I was partying in my early 20s and not giving a care about anything. I fell into depression and horrible hopelessness and worry. My life started to fall apart. I used alcohol and drugs to make me feel better without any thought of the damage they would do. My relationship with my parents deteriorated. I shut out the world and felt completely alone. I became angry at God. Why had he let me suffer? Did I truly deserve all of this? I rejected God completely. I became an atheist, and I thought even if God does exist I didn't want to worship him anyway because of what he had let happen to me. I was consumed by self-pity.

My mother passed away last year before she had reached her 60th birthday. I had never experienced bereavement before in my life. I was again completely shaken, I had such a feeling of hopelessness and sadness in the pit of my stomach. My mother had done so much to help me in life, more than anyone except my father. I started to understand that my time too is limited, and that I wouldn't have forever to turn things around in my life. I felt guilty for not being a better son while she was here.

I started reaching out for community support. I got in touch with a social worker and a support worker who helps people with disabilities manage issues such as housing, healthcare etc. This has helped me not feel so completely alone and hopeless about everything. I started to understand the importance of kindness, because of the kindness and selflessness that I was being shown. This has helped me in practical ways. Since 2019 I've been outside my home less than 10 times, because of pain and also horrible social anxiety. My support worker has been helping me deal with issues like this. While all of this practical support is great, something was missing. Spiritually I still felt empty.

A few weeks ago, I'm not sure what happened, but I started to feel God's presence and love in a way I had not felt in a long time. I remembered the story of Job who had suffered so much yet did not reject God. I started to understand that my heart had been closed to God. I had been blaming God for not being there in my life when I would not even open the door to let him in. I started to realise God doesn't work that way, we have to invite him into our lives, because he gives us free will to choose to love or reject him. I was beginning to see the ridiculousness of the atheistic arguments that I had fallen for in the past, that wanted me to believe the Universe was not created and that our lives have no ultimate meaning or purpose. My eyes became opened to the spiritual warfare that is occurring right now.

All of those problems I faced that had almost broken me had happened so that I would reject God and become spiritually empty, and all of those atheistic lies I was told were designed with the same goals in mind. The problems I face can either break me or make me, faith in God is what makes the difference, faith that God who is all-powerful knows exactly what he is doing and that as long as I truly seek him he will not reject me, he loves me. Nothing that I or my support worker or counsellor can do compares to what God Almighty can do for me if I just allow him into my life. Every good thing ultimately comes from him, and he owes me nothing - every good part of my life is a blessing that he has allowed me to have because he is loving and generous and merciful. Knowing that I am saved by Jesus gives me a feeling of joy that transcends everything else.

I believe that God has guided me here so that I can talk to and learn from other Christians. Even though I was first saved when I was 18, I still feel like a new Christian, and I'm still dealing with feelings of anxiety and doubt, worries about what people around me will think, but I will continue on this path with Jesus by my side, and I will pray every day for him to increase my faith and guide me out of darkness and sin. I know this is a lot to read, and thank you if you did take the time to read it all. Please feel free to message me and please pray for me that God will increase my faith and continue to guide me. If you have any Bible verses that you might think would help please share them with me.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
59,813
29,193
113
#4
All of those problems I faced that had almost broken me had happened so that I would reject God and become spiritually empty, and all of those atheistic lies I was told were designed with the same goals in mind. The problems I face can either break me or make me, faith in God is what makes the difference, faith that God who is all-powerful knows exactly what he is doing and that as long as I truly seek him he will not reject me, he loves me. Nothing that I or my support worker or counsellor can do compares to what God Almighty can do for me if I just allow him into my life. Every good thing ultimately comes from him, and he owes me nothing - every good part of my life is a blessing that he has allowed me to have because he is loving and generous and merciful. Knowing that I am saved by Jesus gives me a feeling of joy that transcends everything else.

Amen!:)
 
Sep 6, 2014
7,034
5,435
113
#5
This is my first visit to this site. My name is Peter, I'm 36 and I live in Ireland. I'm struggling a lot with life, sin, and my faith. I was raised in a non-religious household but went to Catholic school, and never really heard the true message of the Gospel until I was 18. That's when I met some evangelical Christians who explained to me what it means to be saved by grace through the death and resurrection of Jesus. Not long after, when I was alone I reached out to God and I accepted Jesus as my saviour.

Since that time I have struggled a lot with everything in life. My faith weakened over time and I continued to sin and do whatever felt good without care for what God wanted. In 2010, I was diagnosed with an incurable autoimmune disease that causes the bones in my spine and joints to become inflamed and fuse together over time and causes a hunched back. This resulted in a reduction in my mobility and constant pain. A few years later I was diagnosed with cancer. I needed an operation to remove the tumour, but thankfully I did not need further treatment, the cancer had not spread, it was discovered early enough. Regardless, it was still a shocking experience that I still think about every day.

These were not problems that I expected to deal with before I turned 30 when I was partying in my early 20s and not giving a care about anything. I fell into depression and horrible hopelessness and worry. My life started to fall apart. I used alcohol and drugs to make me feel better without any thought of the damage they would do. My relationship with my parents deteriorated. I shut out the world and felt completely alone. I became angry at God. Why had he let me suffer? Did I truly deserve all of this? I rejected God completely. I became an atheist, and I thought even if God does exist I didn't want to worship him anyway because of what he had let happen to me. I was consumed by self-pity.

My mother passed away last year before she had reached her 60th birthday. I had never experienced bereavement before in my life. I was again completely shaken, I had such a feeling of hopelessness and sadness in the pit of my stomach. My mother had done so much to help me in life, more than anyone except my father. I started to understand that my time too is limited, and that I wouldn't have forever to turn things around in my life. I felt guilty for not being a better son while she was here.

I started reaching out for community support. I got in touch with a social worker and a support worker who helps people with disabilities manage issues such as housing, healthcare etc. This has helped me not feel so completely alone and hopeless about everything. I started to understand the importance of kindness, because of the kindness and selflessness that I was being shown. This has helped me in practical ways. Since 2019 I've been outside my home less than 10 times, because of pain and also horrible social anxiety. My support worker has been helping me deal with issues like this. While all of this practical support is great, something was missing. Spiritually I still felt empty.

A few weeks ago, I'm not sure what happened, but I started to feel God's presence and love in a way I had not felt in a long time. I remembered the story of Job who had suffered so much yet did not reject God. I started to understand that my heart had been closed to God. I had been blaming God for not being there in my life when I would not even open the door to let him in. I started to realise God doesn't work that way, we have to invite him into our lives, because he gives us free will to choose to love or reject him. I was beginning to see the ridiculousness of the atheistic arguments that I had fallen for in the past, that wanted me to believe the Universe was not created and that our lives have no ultimate meaning or purpose. My eyes became opened to the spiritual warfare that is occurring right now.

All of those problems I faced that had almost broken me had happened so that I would reject God and become spiritually empty, and all of those atheistic lies I was told were designed with the same goals in mind. The problems I face can either break me or make me, faith in God is what makes the difference, faith that God who is all-powerful knows exactly what he is doing and that as long as I truly seek him he will not reject me, he loves me. Nothing that I or my support worker or counsellor can do compares to what God Almighty can do for me if I just allow him into my life. Every good thing ultimately comes from him, and he owes me nothing - every good part of my life is a blessing that he has allowed me to have because he is loving and generous and merciful. Knowing that I am saved by Jesus gives me a feeling of joy that transcends everything else.

I believe that God has guided me here so that I can talk to and learn from other Christians. Even though I was first saved when I was 18, I still feel like a new Christian, and I'm still dealing with feelings of anxiety and doubt, worries about what people around me will think, but I will continue on this path with Jesus by my side, and I will pray every day for him to increase my faith and guide me out of darkness and sin. I know this is a lot to read, and thank you if you did take the time to read it all. Please feel free to message me and please pray for me that God will increase my faith and continue to guide me. If you have any Bible verses that you might think would help please share them with me.
Thank you for sharing in your gracious sufferings Peter.

Psalm 37:39-40

But the salvation of the righteous is from the Lord;
He is their strength in the time of trouble.
40And the Lord shall help them and deliver them;
He shall deliver them from the wicked,
And save them,
Because they trust in Him.

Hebrews 13:5-6
Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” 6So we may boldly say:

“The Lord is my helper;
I will not fear.
What can man do to me?”
 

Kireina

Well-known member
Aug 26, 2020
1,475
1,393
113
#6
Thank you for sharing brother ❤


I'll include you in my prayers be safe and God bless! Welcome to CC 🤗
 

Bingo

Well-known member
Feb 9, 2019
9,165
4,740
113
#7
- Copy - Copy - Copy (6) - Copy - Copy - Copy - Copy - Copy - Copy - Copy.jpg :)

"It is with hope that within these pages you come to a spiritual awakening."
 

blueskies

Active member
Apr 2, 2022
150
122
43
Pacific Northwest
#9
I believe that God has guided me here so that I can talk to and learn from other Christians.
I believe you and your incredible journey have much to teach others as well.
Thank you for sharing your compelling and moving introduction; it is a blessing for me to read your journey.
God Bess you in your journey my friend.
 

Gideon300

Well-known member
Mar 18, 2021
5,296
3,123
113
#10
This is my first visit to this site. My name is Peter, I'm 36 and I live in Ireland. I'm struggling a lot with life, sin, and my faith. I was raised in a non-religious household but went to Catholic school, and never really heard the true message of the Gospel until I was 18. That's when I met some evangelical Christians who explained to me what it means to be saved by grace through the death and resurrection of Jesus. Not long after, when I was alone I reached out to God and I accepted Jesus as my saviour.

Since that time I have struggled a lot with everything in life. My faith weakened over time and I continued to sin and do whatever felt good without care for what God wanted. In 2010, I was diagnosed with an incurable autoimmune disease that causes the bones in my spine and joints to become inflamed and fuse together over time and causes a hunched back. This resulted in a reduction in my mobility and constant pain. A few years later I was diagnosed with cancer. I needed an operation to remove the tumour, but thankfully I did not need further treatment, the cancer had not spread, it was discovered early enough. Regardless, it was still a shocking experience that I still think about every day.

These were not problems that I expected to deal with before I turned 30 when I was partying in my early 20s and not giving a care about anything. I fell into depression and horrible hopelessness and worry. My life started to fall apart. I used alcohol and drugs to make me feel better without any thought of the damage they would do. My relationship with my parents deteriorated. I shut out the world and felt completely alone. I became angry at God. Why had he let me suffer? Did I truly deserve all of this? I rejected God completely. I became an atheist, and I thought even if God does exist I didn't want to worship him anyway because of what he had let happen to me. I was consumed by self-pity.

My mother passed away last year before she had reached her 60th birthday. I had never experienced bereavement before in my life. I was again completely shaken, I had such a feeling of hopelessness and sadness in the pit of my stomach. My mother had done so much to help me in life, more than anyone except my father. I started to understand that my time too is limited, and that I wouldn't have forever to turn things around in my life. I felt guilty for not being a better son while she was here.

I started reaching out for community support. I got in touch with a social worker and a support worker who helps people with disabilities manage issues such as housing, healthcare etc. This has helped me not feel so completely alone and hopeless about everything. I started to understand the importance of kindness, because of the kindness and selflessness that I was being shown. This has helped me in practical ways. Since 2019 I've been outside my home less than 10 times, because of pain and also horrible social anxiety. My support worker has been helping me deal with issues like this. While all of this practical support is great, something was missing. Spiritually I still felt empty.

A few weeks ago, I'm not sure what happened, but I started to feel God's presence and love in a way I had not felt in a long time. I remembered the story of Job who had suffered so much yet did not reject God. I started to understand that my heart had been closed to God. I had been blaming God for not being there in my life when I would not even open the door to let him in. I started to realise God doesn't work that way, we have to invite him into our lives, because he gives us free will to choose to love or reject him. I was beginning to see the ridiculousness of the atheistic arguments that I had fallen for in the past, that wanted me to believe the Universe was not created and that our lives have no ultimate meaning or purpose. My eyes became opened to the spiritual warfare that is occurring right now.

All of those problems I faced that had almost broken me had happened so that I would reject God and become spiritually empty, and all of those atheistic lies I was told were designed with the same goals in mind. The problems I face can either break me or make me, faith in God is what makes the difference, faith that God who is all-powerful knows exactly what he is doing and that as long as I truly seek him he will not reject me, he loves me. Nothing that I or my support worker or counsellor can do compares to what God Almighty can do for me if I just allow him into my life. Every good thing ultimately comes from him, and he owes me nothing - every good part of my life is a blessing that he has allowed me to have because he is loving and generous and merciful. Knowing that I am saved by Jesus gives me a feeling of joy that transcends everything else.

I believe that God has guided me here so that I can talk to and learn from other Christians. Even though I was first saved when I was 18, I still feel like a new Christian, and I'm still dealing with feelings of anxiety and doubt, worries about what people around me will think, but I will continue on this path with Jesus by my side, and I will pray every day for him to increase my faith and guide me out of darkness and sin. I know this is a lot to read, and thank you if you did take the time to read it all. Please feel free to message me and please pray for me that God will increase my faith and continue to guide me. If you have any Bible verses that you might think would help please share them with me.
Welcome. Thank you for your honesty. I believe that someone was praying for you. And Lord Jesus also intercedes for us. So you can look forward to the future with confidence.

Job knew about God, but he did not know God. His suffering brought him to a place where God could reveal Himself to Job. Once God's purpose had been achieved, the pressure came off and Job was blessed. We are born independent and we imagine that we are self sufficient. We are deceived. Our trials and tribulations cause us to depend on Lord Jesus instead of our own strength. For sure, Satan attacks us and tries to bring us to despair. But God is greater and can cause even Satan's attacks to work for our good.

I struggled much with God. I was like Jacob, except more stubborn. After way too many years, I began to see that God no longer views me as a wretched sinner. I saw that God had immersed me into Jesus. My old self, the one that I hated and despised, was crucified with Christ. Then God raised me with Christ so that I really am a new creation.

Verses that helped me include Galatians 2:20, Colossians 3:3, 2 Corinthians 5:17 and all of Romans 8. My mentor asked me a simple question one evening. Where was I when Jesus died and rose again? Hmmmm. That was 2,000 years ago. So what part did I have to play in my salvation? Nothing! It is done! It is finished! All I have to do is accept it. For years, I'd being trying to attain to the salvation that God had already given me as a gift. When we see this, it changes us. Ask God to open your eyes.
 
Sep 6, 2014
7,034
5,435
113
#11

Matthew 6:25-26
Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? 26Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,550
17,022
113
69
Tennessee
#13
You have traveled down a rough road for sure but please know that God will neither leave you nor forsake you. Perhaps you are right in your sense that God has directed your path to this site. I will say a prayer for God to address your situation. Glad to have you as part of our family. Welcome to CC.
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
1,383
640
113
#14
This is my first visit to this site. My name is Peter, I'm 36 and I live in Ireland. I'm struggling a lot with life, sin, and my faith. I was raised in a non-religious household but went to Catholic school, and never really heard the true message of the Gospel until I was 18. That's when I met some evangelical Christians who explained to me what it means to be saved by grace through the death and resurrection of Jesus. Not long after, when I was alone I reached out to God and I accepted Jesus as my saviour.

Since that time I have struggled a lot with everything in life. My faith weakened over time and I continued to sin and do whatever felt good without care for what God wanted. In 2010, I was diagnosed with an incurable autoimmune disease that causes the bones in my spine and joints to become inflamed and fuse together over time and causes a hunched back. This resulted in a reduction in my mobility and constant pain. A few years later I was diagnosed with cancer. I needed an operation to remove the tumour, but thankfully I did not need further treatment, the cancer had not spread, it was discovered early enough. Regardless, it was still a shocking experience that I still think about every day.

These were not problems that I expected to deal with before I turned 30 when I was partying in my early 20s and not giving a care about anything. I fell into depression and horrible hopelessness and worry. My life started to fall apart. I used alcohol and drugs to make me feel better without any thought of the damage they would do. My relationship with my parents deteriorated. I shut out the world and felt completely alone. I became angry at God. Why had he let me suffer? Did I truly deserve all of this? I rejected God completely. I became an atheist, and I thought even if God does exist I didn't want to worship him anyway because of what he had let happen to me. I was consumed by self-pity.

My mother passed away last year before she had reached her 60th birthday. I had never experienced bereavement before in my life. I was again completely shaken, I had such a feeling of hopelessness and sadness in the pit of my stomach. My mother had done so much to help me in life, more than anyone except my father. I started to understand that my time too is limited, and that I wouldn't have forever to turn things around in my life. I felt guilty for not being a better son while she was here.

I started reaching out for community support. I got in touch with a social worker and a support worker who helps people with disabilities manage issues such as housing, healthcare etc. This has helped me not feel so completely alone and hopeless about everything. I started to understand the importance of kindness, because of the kindness and selflessness that I was being shown. This has helped me in practical ways. Since 2019 I've been outside my home less than 10 times, because of pain and also horrible social anxiety. My support worker has been helping me deal with issues like this. While all of this practical support is great, something was missing. Spiritually I still felt empty.

A few weeks ago, I'm not sure what happened, but I started to feel God's presence and love in a way I had not felt in a long time. I remembered the story of Job who had suffered so much yet did not reject God. I started to understand that my heart had been closed to God. I had been blaming God for not being there in my life when I would not even open the door to let him in. I started to realise God doesn't work that way, we have to invite him into our lives, because he gives us free will to choose to love or reject him. I was beginning to see the ridiculousness of the atheistic arguments that I had fallen for in the past, that wanted me to believe the Universe was not created and that our lives have no ultimate meaning or purpose. My eyes became opened to the spiritual warfare that is occurring right now.

All of those problems I faced that had almost broken me had happened so that I would reject God and become spiritually empty, and all of those atheistic lies I was told were designed with the same goals in mind. The problems I face can either break me or make me, faith in God is what makes the difference, faith that God who is all-powerful knows exactly what he is doing and that as long as I truly seek him he will not reject me, he loves me. Nothing that I or my support worker or counsellor can do compares to what God Almighty can do for me if I just allow him into my life. Every good thing ultimately comes from him, and he owes me nothing - every good part of my life is a blessing that he has allowed me to have because he is loving and generous and merciful. Knowing that I am saved by Jesus gives me a feeling of joy that transcends everything else.

I believe that God has guided me here so that I can talk to and learn from other Christians. Even though I was first saved when I was 18, I still feel like a new Christian, and I'm still dealing with feelings of anxiety and doubt, worries about what people around me will think, but I will continue on this path with Jesus by my side, and I will pray every day for him to increase my faith and guide me out of darkness and sin. I know this is a lot to read, and thank you if you did take the time to read it all. Please feel free to message me and please pray for me that God will increase my faith and continue to guide me. If you have any Bible verses that you might think would help please share them with me.
Hey, Peter.

Thank you for sharing your story with us.

I don't even know what to say to you at this specific moment, but I would be willing to chat with you if you have any questions or if you just need a listening ear.

I do feel compelled to share this portion of scripture with you, though, so here goes:

Romans chapter 8

[16] The Spirit itself bears witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God:
[17] And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.
[18] For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.
[19] For the earnest expectation of the creature waits for the manifestation of the sons of God.
[20] For the creature was made subject to vanity, not willingly, but by reason of him who has subjected the same in hope,
[21] Because the creature itself also shall be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God.
[22] For we know that the whole creation groans and travails in pain together until now.
[23] And not only they, but ourselves also, which have the first-fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body.

As a Christian, you have a very real hope of receiving a glorified body at the second coming of Jesus Christ. In the interim, God is still very much in the healing business.

Anyhow, again, if you ever want to chat, then I've got two good ears (and a big mouth...lol).

Welcome aboard.
 

SteveEpperson

Junior Member
May 12, 2018
552
221
43
#15
May you be blessed by the Lord,

the Creator of heaven and earth. Psalm 115:15


My help comes from the Lord,

the Creator of heaven and earth. Psalm 121:2


“But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself.” Philippians 3:20-21

"The wall was built of jasper, while the city was pure gold, clear as glass. The foundations of the wall of the city were adorned with every kind of jewel. The first was jasper, the second sapphire, the third agate, the fourth emerald." Revelation 21:18-19


I pray someday that I have half the faith you possess.

When you finally finish the race and the Lord takes you, I am convinced there is a vault of gold with your name on it. You will be seated at an enormous banquet table with the likes of Job, Peter, and Paul.

Keep contributing to this site and let me continue learning from you.
 

Evmur

Well-known member
Feb 28, 2021
5,219
2,618
113
London
christianchat.com
#16
This is my first visit to this site. My name is Peter, I'm 36 and I live in Ireland. I'm struggling a lot with life, sin, and my faith. I was raised in a non-religious household but went to Catholic school, and never really heard the true message of the Gospel until I was 18. That's when I met some evangelical Christians who explained to me what it means to be saved by grace through the death and resurrection of Jesus. Not long after, when I was alone I reached out to God and I accepted Jesus as my saviour.

Since that time I have struggled a lot with everything in life. My faith weakened over time and I continued to sin and do whatever felt good without care for what God wanted. In 2010, I was diagnosed with an incurable autoimmune disease that causes the bones in my spine and joints to become inflamed and fuse together over time and causes a hunched back. This resulted in a reduction in my mobility and constant pain. A few years later I was diagnosed with cancer. I needed an operation to remove the tumour, but thankfully I did not need further treatment, the cancer had not spread, it was discovered early enough. Regardless, it was still a shocking experience that I still think about every day.

These were not problems that I expected to deal with before I turned 30 when I was partying in my early 20s and not giving a care about anything. I fell into depression and horrible hopelessness and worry. My life started to fall apart. I used alcohol and drugs to make me feel better without any thought of the damage they would do. My relationship with my parents deteriorated. I shut out the world and felt completely alone. I became angry at God. Why had he let me suffer? Did I truly deserve all of this? I rejected God completely. I became an atheist, and I thought even if God does exist I didn't want to worship him anyway because of what he had let happen to me. I was consumed by self-pity.

My mother passed away last year before she had reached her 60th birthday. I had never experienced bereavement before in my life. I was again completely shaken, I had such a feeling of hopelessness and sadness in the pit of my stomach. My mother had done so much to help me in life, more than anyone except my father. I started to understand that my time too is limited, and that I wouldn't have forever to turn things around in my life. I felt guilty for not being a better son while she was here.

I started reaching out for community support. I got in touch with a social worker and a support worker who helps people with disabilities manage issues such as housing, healthcare etc. This has helped me not feel so completely alone and hopeless about everything. I started to understand the importance of kindness, because of the kindness and selflessness that I was being shown. This has helped me in practical ways. Since 2019 I've been outside my home less than 10 times, because of pain and also horrible social anxiety. My support worker has been helping me deal with issues like this. While all of this practical support is great, something was missing. Spiritually I still felt empty.

A few weeks ago, I'm not sure what happened, but I started to feel God's presence and love in a way I had not felt in a long time. I remembered the story of Job who had suffered so much yet did not reject God. I started to understand that my heart had been closed to God. I had been blaming God for not being there in my life when I would not even open the door to let him in. I started to realise God doesn't work that way, we have to invite him into our lives, because he gives us free will to choose to love or reject him. I was beginning to see the ridiculousness of the atheistic arguments that I had fallen for in the past, that wanted me to believe the Universe was not created and that our lives have no ultimate meaning or purpose. My eyes became opened to the spiritual warfare that is occurring right now.

All of those problems I faced that had almost broken me had happened so that I would reject God and become spiritually empty, and all of those atheistic lies I was told were designed with the same goals in mind. The problems I face can either break me or make me, faith in God is what makes the difference, faith that God who is all-powerful knows exactly what he is doing and that as long as I truly seek him he will not reject me, he loves me. Nothing that I or my support worker or counsellor can do compares to what God Almighty can do for me if I just allow him into my life. Every good thing ultimately comes from him, and he owes me nothing - every good part of my life is a blessing that he has allowed me to have because he is loving and generous and merciful. Knowing that I am saved by Jesus gives me a feeling of joy that transcends everything else.

I believe that God has guided me here so that I can talk to and learn from other Christians. Even though I was first saved when I was 18, I still feel like a new Christian, and I'm still dealing with feelings of anxiety and doubt, worries about what people around me will think, but I will continue on this path with Jesus by my side, and I will pray every day for him to increase my faith and guide me out of darkness and sin. I know this is a lot to read, and thank you if you did take the time to read it all. Please feel free to message me and please pray for me that God will increase my faith and continue to guide me. If you have any Bible verses that you might think would help please share them with me.
Hi Peter

I highly recommend the ministry of Joseph Prince to you ... God is going to take care of you.
"He who began a good work in you will carry it through to completion unto that day"
 

TabinRivCA

Well-known member
Oct 23, 2018
13,052
10,616
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#17
Nice to have you joining the fellowship here at CC. Scriptures that come to mind for you Phil 4:6-7 6Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.…
Also, Isa 26:3 You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!
Many good responses here that I hope encouraged you. God bless you and keep you!
 
C

ChristianTonyB

Guest
#18
Thank you for graciously sharing your experiences and feelings with us Peter. That shows you have a lot of courage, and love. You have encouraged many of us with struggles, to keep walking in the love and hope of Jesus, as you are. Welcome, and Shalom 🙂