Question for the mothers and wives on the chat.

Buy her a nightgown or robe that makes her feel naked when she wears it. Problem solved.

But is also doesn't say anything to the matter. We have one instance
according to culture when Noah was seen naked he cursed his son.

Beyond that we have commands on sexual immorality and dressing modestly
which also included no jewelry, having long hair, not having braided hair, gold
or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness.

Obviously at a certain age it would become a problem as teens or early pre-
teens start to experience hormones or be embarrassed by the lack of clothing.

Parents just must be wise about it and realize that as kids get older their understanding and
awareness changes. Young kids literally can breast feed with no thoughts on abnormal nudity.

I wish it were that simple. she has them I’ve bought her luxurious fuzzy bath robes, and at times yea she uses them but there is still times when she just doesn’t care I think. Maybe she’s just that comfortable around the house at times but when I think back to my mother I never would have imagined her doing that in front of us and I think it would have been traumatic to me to see some of the things my son is allowed to see. to my recollection never saw my mother in a bra. She was always fully clothed in some fashion. Maybe I’m the problem and I’m just overreacting to it because of my bias to what I wasn’t exposed to as a child but whatever it is . It has given and continues to give me a less than ideal and somewhat un-comfortable reaction .so if nothing else I need to figure out why it gives me the improper reaction and by Gods grace maybe he can change me. I don’t know. I’d say this at its height would happen 4 times a week. Now it seems to only happen every couple weeks sometimes longer. So there is some improvement.

I wish it were that simple. she has them I’ve bought her luxurious fuzzy bath robes, and at times yea she uses them but there is still times when she just doesn’t care I think. Maybe she’s just that comfortable around the house at times but when I think back to my mother I never would have imagined her doing that in front of us and I think it would have been traumatic to me to see some of the things my son is allowed to see. to my recollection never saw my mother in a bra. She was always fully clothed in some fashion. Maybe I’m the problem and I’m just overreacting to it because of my bias to what I wasn’t exposed to as a child but whatever it is . It has given and continues to give me a less than ideal and somewhat un-comfortable reaction .so if nothing else I need to figure out why it gives me the improper reaction and by Gods grace maybe he can change me. I don’t know. I’d say this at its height would happen 4 times a week. Now it seems to only happen every couple weeks sometimes longer. So there is some improvement.

Something is really wrong here. I was a wife for 15+ years and I have been a Mother for 26+ years.
The Bible says that ‘you shall not uncover your family’s nakedness,’ and it seems very wrong to be naked in front of another family member. Obviously a husband and wife are not ashamed but again this verse in Genesis implies it to be shameful to be naked which is why God covered Adam and Eve up and also is why they hid from God because they knew they were naked.
As a kid, I remember seeing both my Father’s and my Mother’s nakedness through their carelessness or whatever and I can safely say it has mentally scarred me for the rest of my life (I am almost 50). I seriously wish they had taken more care as I do not want that in my mind. I try to be careful and responsible around my kids because I don’t ever want to make them feel that way. It’s damaging from my experience, and I really cannot understand why your wife is being so carefree about it; is she a Christian? I guess my parents were part of that 70’s liberal culture and when I was in the World I was also very liberal about modesty, and thought it was kinda cool to be naked and to allow kids to be; but as a Christian I realise that apart from being wrong and immoral, this can also leave children more vulnerable to paedophiles and also is not teaching them the importance of boundaries in life which are there to protect them. This potentially has far reaching implications. It also has a way of undermining respect for parents in my experience.
Hope it’s a help. I would pray for wisdom how to deal with this, maybe try to patiently explain to your wife about it. I have to be honest I was very shocked when I read your post.

Thankyou for your thoughts. Yes she is a Christian as far she will say but I think she has much growing and learning to do as do I of course. I know, it’s crazy the things one can read about peoples lives behind closed doors. I had some hesitations to post it but it was really eating at me the other day and I needed to attempt to get some fellowship advice on what to do. I do my best just to ignore it and be silent but it eats at me for reasons I’m not quite sure the truth as to why.

There was a thread here a while back where the topic of Ham uncovering Noah's nakedness
came up and was explained in terms of Levitical laws: “None of you shall approach any one
of his close relatives to uncover nakedness.” The phrase “to uncover nakedness” is aptly a
euphemism for sexual intercourse, which is how the NIV translates it throughout Leviticus 18.
The phrase “to see the nakedness of” is used in Leviticus 20, again as a euphemism for incest:
“If a man takes his sister...and sees her nakedness, and she sees his nakedness, it is a disgrace...”
(Leviticus 20:17). The first act of incest Moses forbids is between a son and his mother. “You
shall not uncover the nakedness of your father, which is the nakedness of your mother;
she is your mother, you shall not uncover her nakedness” (Leviticus 18:7). source

I have learned two things from you in two days thank you. Changes that whole scenario in severity.

You are welcome! It was further explained that Noah cursed Ham's son because that son was the offspring of the illicit union between Ham and his mother, who was the progenitor of the Canaanites: a people who over time became so morally, sexually, and spiritually compromised and corrupt with every act of sexual deviancy, whether adultery, incest, homosexuality, or bestiality, that God brought the armies of Israel under Joshua’s leadership into their land to conquer and destroy them. This had been promised to Abraham hundreds of years before (Genesis 17:8) Canaan became Israel's "promised land."

Do you think it’s right to ignore it and keep silent, brother?
This is definitely a matter for prayer and I hope your family is in a good church where the Bible is preached and they pray for one another. Do you have Bible reading and prayer as a family?

There was a time I thought the best thing I could do was ignore it,thinking it would stop on its own and so in the best interest of keeping the peace in the marriage I stayed silent with a subtle fearful spirit because she does not handle conflicts with me well at all and she is usually the one to take a simple well meaning suggestion or well intentioned criticism done as gently as I can muster and make it a personal attack and those conflicts get down right ugly and get out of hand quickly. Yes, we have some marital relating issues as well…. Don’t get me wrong 95% of the time When we aren’t in conflict things are great, better than great but as soon as that 5% of the time when conflict comes it’s WW3. But anyway I won’t get into any more of that hot mess because that could be a post on its own, believe me. but now I’m seeing that was probably not such a good idea to stay quiet.

It is a Bible preaching church that we attend. We have been going to that almost every Sunday for almost 2 years. They are a smaller building that holds 3 sessions so the Entire congregation is pretty large and as a result it’s not quite as personal. They rely on small groups that meet weekly to get into the more individual stuff. Which I attend a men’s group and she attends a women’s group. It’s Not one of those mega churches where there are thousands of attendance but it is one of the more popular and therefore larger ones in the community. Prayer time as a family is on and off lately . I read Bible stories from a kids Bible to my son almost everynight before he goes to bed. We tried praying as a couple but that kinda fell apart because 99% of her prayer concerns day after day during our prayer time were career related. Honestly I need my wife to show up in prayer for us as a couple and not have her career life invading. I understand an issue here or there professionally which I had patience for but it continued night after night and really took away from prayer as a couple It would Probably another good topic for a separate post. —Keeping couples prayer focused on the family and marriage rather than profession and other externals. Had that issue with the marriage books we went through as well. Everything in the marriage books relating to how we should relate to each other in marriage seemed to bounce off her brain and get related to her workplace relationships and issues instead of us in marriage ,but I digress.

Thank you for sharing all that; keep praying for your wife, brother... seek Him about your own heart and then you will not have your prayers for her hindered.., The Word tells us that Christ is your Leader- so He will help you know what to do about all this. He hears your prayers said from a broken heart and spirit... Cast your cares on Him for He cares for you... and please don’t think that bearing with your wife and listening to her going on about work is getting in the way of prayer... it’s your ministry as a husband and God is pleased when you listen and bear with her. Don’t look at the circumstances and let them get you down-hearted, but use all of the discouraging things she says, to intercede on her behalf, because then you will be to her as Christ is to His. Church... and one day brother, all this suffering will have been worth it. We must arm ourselves with the mind of Christ. It’s a blessing for me to be reminded of this right now, we as Christians are called to suffering for others, and we are promised great reward for it. I hope one day you see the fruit of this suffering and endurance, I hope one day your family has more love and stability because of you laying down your life for your wife and family in these difficult circumstances, which will ultimately glorify God...but always remember, He knows, He cares... and He is your helper; He created the Heavens and the Earth and our problems are not too difficult for Him. Keep trusting Him, keep asking to be filled with His Spirit, keep pouring out to her the unconditional love He gives you.
I’m sorry to hear your Church is so impersonal; it’s great there are so many attending though! However, maybe you could pray for God to lead you to a man or two in Church who have a good relationship with God and also stable marriages; mature men of God. God is able to provide all your needs; if your anything like me you probably don’t ask enough or trust enough. Maybe start praying for her right where she’s at; no expectations, no pressure; this is how our Lord is with us; he meets us where we are at, no matter how far from ideal that is; and He gives us the help we need. If she sees this kind of love maybe she will receive wisdom from you more readily, she may just be under too much pressure right now. Love never fails🙂
I hope I have been some encouragement to you brother and thank you for your humility.
God bless you, your wife and your son.

I’ve wrestled with this for a lot of years as a husband and a father. Ever since my wife had our son she began to walk around the house naked randomly without care even if the blinds are open like she has zero modesty. She clearly was not after sex it confused me at first and I began to have to intentionally and directly ask her if this is a sex thing or not…. More often than not the answer was Nope she just felt like being naked…. Or haven’t gotten dressed yet. There has been a couple times I’ve had to remind her the Windows are open to the street. For a while it was happening so often that It became normalized behavior so I just stopped paying attention to it mostly.
Prior, during dating she dressed modestly in neck sweaters and now she just doesn’t seem to care about modesty. Now that our son is 6 he is making verbal observations when moms naked. I understand the maternal need for children to bond with their mother at infant age which includes brest feeding etc. but now that he’s noticing moms nakedness at 6. when does this stuff stop? Or is she going to be doing this when he is in his teens? rarely does she close a door to change ,shower, bathe , and quite often she will walk in on me using the bathroom, showering, toilet whatever unannounced and linger and try to converse as I’m needing some privacy to do my own business. Our Son has learned to do this same thing from observing her. I started locking the doors years ago to not be interrupted because the verbalized need for privacy went in one ear and out the other. It’s gotten a bit better as the years go on. Happens less frequently now but for a while it seemed as though there was zero modesty in the home and zero expectation of any privacy. So my curiosity has the best of me today ladies . Is this normal behavior that most women experience after having children? This seemingly loss of modesty and a lack of any real respect for privacy of other family members in the home?

Maybe start praying for her right where she’s at; no expectations, no pressure; this is how our Lord is with us; he meets us where we are at, no matter how far from ideal that is; and He gives us the help we need

But if I had kids, even more so would I take care to shut doors and teach them about privacy and private parts are just that, private.

I'm not a mom, but this reminds me of a funny story that nipped this issue in the bud, so to speak. My BIL use to go to the bathroom on their property. They have lots of land and family on all sides. So instead of going to the bathroom when he was out working on the property he'd just ,well go wee wherever he was standing. My sister considered that rather red neck but he continued to do it. Well monkey see monkey do, my oldest nephew would follow old dad around the property and do the same.

That was all fine and good until one day they were at the church picnic. All of a suddenly my sister says to her husband "look at your son!" And here he was, bare cheeks to the world, taking a wee in the church bushes. Yep. That stopped that problem real fast !! That little boy is now 17 and I'm dying to tell that story when he asks me to toast him on his wedding day.

On a more serious note, it sounds like your wife was going through depression. It's not normal to be walking that way around the house, especially with young children around. All kinds of predator ready to groom a child. If they have no inhibitions about nakedness, private parts, they are already a target for a predator. It's not something I do in my home and there are no children. But my mother was a nurse and had seen a lot and she always drummed in to us about privacy. My husband is the same way. We have separate bathrooms. Just something we were brought up to. But if I had kids, even more so would I take care to shut doors and teach them about privacy and private parts are just that, private.