CRA Christians in Recovery (anonymous)

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

Cabrillo

Active member
Sep 6, 2021
420
221
43
Sorry folks, my new chromebook won't copy/paste w/o a mouse so I can't transfer the partners in hope daily readings to here for now.

The site where I got them is pihtoday.blogspot.com , I couldn't transfer the link but you all should be able to find it. It's Partners In hope. Vancouver, BC. Unfortunately There are several different groups with the same name. This one is all christian base, recovery based and they use the Bible more than the big book. Thank Jesus we have such wonderful sources that we can draw upon and trust... The Good News!

What the Lord has set free is free indeed!
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
WEDNESDAY MARCH 9, 2022 - WORDS - THE POWER TO ENCOURAGE OR CRUSH
Audio for WORDS - THE POWER TO ENCOURAGE OR CRUSH


We have all experienced the power of negative words in our own lives and may also have observed the effect in others’ lives as they shared with us. Some of us carry the effects of harsh words for a lifetime and find it difficult to get past the hurtful impact. When we take time to reflect, we will often be able to recall some words that a kind person has said to us and allow those words to bring hope to our heart and a smile to our face.

A gentle answer makes anger disappear, but a rough answer makes it grow. Good people think before they answer, but the wicked do not, and what they say causes trouble. Kind words are like a life-giving tree, but lying words will crush your spirit. (Proverbs 15:1, 28, 4 ERV)

It is now time for each of us to consider what impact our words may have on others. Will we speak with gentleness or with harsh criticism about something a person has said or done that we do not approve of? Will we give a compliment or a word of appreciation, or will we condemn someone for not doing a job exactly the way we thought they should? We are a work in progress and want to be recognized as such. Will we give the same honour to others by how we speak to them or speak about them?

Listening to wise people increases your knowledge, but only nonsense comes from the mouths of fools. People are happy when they give a good answer. And there is nothing better than the right word at the right time. (Proverbs 15:2, 23 ERV)

In our society, with its emphasis on social media, the thoughtless use of words is often reflected in our texts and posts rather than through our mouths. In what is not a person-to-person encounter, we often feel free to express our thoughts without first filtering them. It is always wise to think before we speak or post. Much harm may be caused to a person by what we say or post. With things hanging in cyberspace long after we delete them from our own page, we need to be aware that we have less control over the harm caused by social media posts than by actual face-to-face encounters.

Prayer: Loving God, help me to consider what I say and its impact on others.
Give me the patience and self-control necessary to filter my thoughts before
I respond to others, so my words may encourage rather than crush. Amen


©2022 Partners in Hope
 

Cabrillo

Active member
Sep 6, 2021
420
221
43
WEDNESDAY MARCH 9, 2022 - WORDS - THE POWER TO ENCOURAGE OR CRUSH
Audio for WORDS - THE POWER TO ENCOURAGE OR CRUSH


We have all experienced the power of negative words in our own lives and may also have observed the effect in others’ lives as they shared with us. Some of us carry the effects of harsh words for a lifetime and find it difficult to get past the hurtful impact. When we take time to reflect, we will often be able to recall some words that a kind person has said to us and allow those words to bring hope to our heart and a smile to our face.

A gentle answer makes anger disappear, but a rough answer makes it grow. Good people think before they answer, but the wicked do not, and what they say causes trouble. Kind words are like a life-giving tree, but lying words will crush your spirit. (Proverbs 15:1, 28, 4 ERV)

It is now time for each of us to consider what impact our words may have on others. Will we speak with gentleness or with harsh criticism about something a person has said or done that we do not approve of? Will we give a compliment or a word of appreciation, or will we condemn someone for not doing a job exactly the way we thought they should? We are a work in progress and want to be recognized as such. Will we give the same honour to others by how we speak to them or speak about them?

Listening to wise people increases your knowledge, but only nonsense comes from the mouths of fools. People are happy when they give a good answer. And there is nothing better than the right word at the right time. (Proverbs 15:2, 23 ERV)

In our society, with its emphasis on social media, the thoughtless use of words is often reflected in our texts and posts rather than through our mouths. In what is not a person-to-person encounter, we often feel free to express our thoughts without first filtering them. It is always wise to think before we speak or post. Much harm may be caused to a person by what we say or post. With things hanging in cyberspace long after we delete them from our own page, we need to be aware that we have less control over the harm caused by social media posts than by actual face-to-face encounters.

Prayer: Loving God, help me to consider what I say and its impact on others.
Give me the patience and self-control necessary to filter my thoughts before
I respond to others, so my words may encourage rather than crush. Amen


©2022 Partners in Hope
Thanks Magenta. That was a great help.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
FRIDAY MARCH 11, 2022 - MY HELPER and MY DEFENDER
Audio for MY HELPER and MY DEFENDER

We say it over and over again because it is true every day of our life: “We are powerless on our own.“ Our lives are unmanageable; our problems are too great; our issues are too confusing; our emotional challenges are too overwhelming unless we ask God to come and help us.

Save me by your power, O God; set me free by your might! Hear my prayer, O God; listen to
my words! Proud people are coming to attack me; cruel people are trying to kill me—those
who do not care about God. But God is my helper. The Lord is my defender. (Psalm 54:1-4 GNT)

Along with the writer of this Psalm we can confidently come to God today and ask for His help. Too many people think it’s “self-centered” to ask God for help and to bring our concerns to Him. The opposite is true. God is waiting for us to invite Him into our circumstances so He can provide the help we need.

Whether it is harsh words from others, misunderstandings that are beyond our control to fix, or just people acting thoughtlessly in ways that cause harm, God wants to come alongside us, care for us, and help resolve our problems. If we think we have to do it on our own, then we are not allowing God to be our helper and our defender and we are missing out on the goodness that God wants to pour into our lives.

So, all you people in faraway places, turn to me and be saved, because I am God, and there is
no other. When I make a promise, that promise is true. It will happen. (Isaiah 45:22-23a ERV)

Even though we may be new to trusting God and our ability to believe that God can work effectively is not solid, if we will just turn our will and our life over to God’s care, He will keep His promise. He will work on our behalf. He will rescue us and settle those things that concern us as we turn them over to His care.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, You have made many amazing promises and I want to
trust You to give me wisdom and the courage to face those things that concern me
today. I trust You to do what You promise to be my helper and my defender. Amen

©2022 Partners in Hope
 

Cabrillo

Active member
Sep 6, 2021
420
221
43
FRIDAY MARCH 11, 2022 - MY HELPER and MY DEFENDER
Audio for MY HELPER and MY DEFENDER


We say it over and over again because it is true every day of our life: “We are powerless on our own.“ Our lives are unmanageable; our problems are too great; our issues are too confusing; our emotional challenges are too overwhelming unless we ask God to come and help us.

Save me by your power, O God; set me free by your might! Hear my prayer, O God; listen to
my words! Proud people are coming to attack me; cruel people are trying to kill me—those
who do not care about God. But God is my helper. The Lord is my defender. (Psalm 54:1-4 GNT)


Along with the writer of this Psalm we can confidently come to God today and ask for His help. Too many people think it’s “self-centered” to ask God for help and to bring our concerns to Him. The opposite is true. God is waiting for us to invite Him into our circumstances so He can provide the help we need.

Whether it is harsh words from others, misunderstandings that are beyond our control to fix, or just people acting thoughtlessly in ways that cause harm, God wants to come alongside us, care for us, and help resolve our problems. If we think we have to do it on our own, then we are not allowing God to be our helper and our defender and we are missing out on the goodness that God wants to pour into our lives.

So, all you people in faraway places, turn to me and be saved, because I am God, and there is
no other. When I make a promise, that promise is true. It will happen. (Isaiah 45:22-23a ERV)


Even though we may be new to trusting God and our ability to believe that God can work effectively is not solid, if we will just turn our will and our life over to God’s care, He will keep His promise. He will work on our behalf. He will rescue us and settle those things that concern us as we turn them over to His care.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, You have made many amazing promises and I want to
trust You to give me wisdom and the courage to face those things that concern me
today. I trust You to do what You promise to be my helper and my defender. Amen


©2022 Partners in Hope
I, my self have resisted praying for help and needs. I sometimes seems selfish or crybaby like to me. When I was a child if I started being dramatic, my folks would tell me shut up before you really get something to cry about. Sometimes I feel like my life is a punishment for some long forgotten unconfessed sin. I even hesitate to pray for help sometimes because I often feel like it's all my fault and that I deserve to be miserable.

I realize that this is stinkin' thinkin' and It's also why I'm here. "An alcoholic or addict alone is in bad company."
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
I, my self have resisted praying for help and needs. I sometimes seems selfish or crybaby like to me. When I was a child if I started being dramatic, my folks would tell me shut up before you really get something to cry about. Sometimes I feel like my life is a punishment for some long forgotten unconfessed sin. I even hesitate to pray for help sometimes because I often feel like it's all my fault and that I deserve to be miserable.

I realize that this is stinkin' thinkin' and It's also why I'm here. "An alcoholic or addict alone is in bad company."
The wonderful thing is, God knows our needs before we even ask. I do think asking and praying about things helps clarify in our own hearts and minds the right course of action to take, and the proper attitude to hold. Taking a course of action without the proper attitude can backfire on us, so making sure the two mesh harmoniously is wise. "Check your motives." Sometimes people check their motive and realize some action is grounded in a wrong attitude, but move ahead any ways. I have been guilty of this, but it improves over time :)
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
"An alcoholic or addict alone is in bad company."
This is very problematic for many during these times when social distancing is recommended, leading to more alone time for a great many and near total isolation for some. Thank goodness we have social media, even though it is not as great as meeting in person and hanging out to relax and enjoy people's company like we used to. Still, it is better than nothing :) I recently passed my eleven year milestone of sobriety, and did so alone. I was never one for fanfare, but always "took a cake" in one fellowship or another over the years. After I passed my second year eight, I did want to do something special when year nine arrived, so I invited my pastor's wife to give me my cake at my AA home group, and others (including my pastor) in my church family attended also. I am really glad I did something different by inviting people I love, because it was such a special day in so many ways, and the last time I took a cake. Within a little over three months from then everything started shutting down, and even meeting spaces were closed for a time.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
SATURDAY MARCH 12, 2022 - IS THERE ANY GOOD REASON TO WAIT?
Audio for IS THERE ANY GOOD REASON TO WAIT?

We are not used to waiting for anything and most of us dislike it. We hate traffic congestion, line-ups for various services, being put on a wait list for housing etc. Who of us likes to sit in the doctor’s office waiting to be seen? We’d much rather have the instant access to information and service we can get on the internet or from social media. What do we do with the many times the Bible tells us we are to be patient and wait on the Lord? Is there any good reason for us to do that?

I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, And in His word I do hope. My soul waits for the Lord More than
those who watch for the morning—Yes, more than those who watch for the morning. (Psalm 130:5-6 NKJV)

When we first come to believe in God, all of us are impatient for what we want Him to do for us. Like the good Father He is, God is very gracious and often responds quickly to His newborn children, but there comes a time when He will teach us to wait. Learning to wait for what we want is one way to leave certain character defects behind and to grow into a mature person.

The Lord is wonderfully good to those who wait for him, to those who seek for him. It is good
both to hope and wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord. (Lamentations 3:25-26 TLB)

We are not good at waiting for God to act. Like a good Father, God will not always give us the answer to our prayers that we want at the time that we want but will answer what we have asked at just the right time. Sometimes when we encounter traffic congestion we try to avoid waiting and seek another route only to find that others have done the same thing and we end up in a bottleneck that is even longer than where we first were. When we fail to wait for God to do the right thing at the right time and seek an alternate way, just like in traffic congestion, we often end up in a worse mess.

This foolish plan of God is wiser than the wisest of human plans, and God’s
weakness is stronger than the greatest of human strength. (1 Corinthians 1:25 NLT)

Prayer: Heavenly Father, Help me to be willing to wait when You are
silent and have faith that You are still at work on my behalf. Amen

©2022 Partners in Hope

 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
SUNDAY MARCH 13, 2022 - A POWERFUL SIGN OF MATURITY
Audio for A POWERFUL SIGN OF MATURITY


Learning to control our tongue is a sign that we are becoming mature in our thinking process. In the past we let angry words express our opinion about something that was said or done without giving too much thought to what we were saying. Our reactions may have been caused by pain of a past hurt being exposed through the behaviour of another or trauma over something that is presently causing us to fear. Instead of seeking help to deal with the hurt or fear, we allowed our minds to dwell on the event until our thinking and behaviour became irrational.

All of us do many wrong things. But if you can control your tongue,
you are mature and able to control your whole body. (James 3:2 CEV)

When a plant or tree is transplanted, its ability to mature is totally reliant on it being rooted in the new soil it is planted in. When we come into recovery we need to be completely removed from our old way of life. Our new life with God in recovery requires that we leave behind everything that would hinder us from becoming the mature person God created us to be. Our old ways of coping with troubling situations need to be totally uprooted and transplanted into the new ways we are learning.

Each of you is now a new person. You are becoming more and more like
your Creator, and you will understand him better. (Colossians 3:10 CEV)


Our growth into maturity was stunted by our old ways of thinking and behaving. If we allow our old ways to influence the new growth, our ability to grow and mature will be obstructed. We were living in rebellion against God but now we have been uprooted and transplanted into a new life with God as our Father. The old ways of thinking and behaving must be left behind so we can grow and mature in the new ways we are learning.

Don’t be like the people of this world, but let God change the way you think. Then
you will know how to do everything that is good and pleasing to him. (Romans 12:2 CEV)


Prayer: Heavenly Father, Help me leave behind my old ways of thinking and behaving
so I can be renewed in my mind by obeying Your principles in all my affairs. Amen


©2022 Partners in Hope
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
THURSDAY MARCH 17, 2022 - ST. PATRICK – MODEL FOR LIFE IN RECOVERY
Audio for ST. PATRICK - MODEL FOR LIFE IN RECOVERY


Deep pain that results from unfair and unjust treatment by others is the reality of many people.
Some of us try to cover up that pain with substances and other destructive addictions. With the
memories we choose to carry, it's hard to believe that we could live sober, let alone live well.


If you are tired from carrying heavy burdens, come to me and I will give you rest. (Matthew 11:28 CEV)

Saint Patrick, who is celebrated around the world today, was just a child when he was captured
by pirates, taken to Ireland, and sold as a slave to herd and tend sheep. We can only imagine the
fear and loneliness he experienced while he was separated from his family and familiar surroundings
and held captive by strangers who only wanted to use him for their own gain.


Patrick managed to escape when he was twenty years old and was reunited with his family. However,
some time later he responded to the call of God to return to Ireland and bring the message of God's
hope and love to the very people who had used and abused him.

Patrick's faith in God helped him rise above his circumstances to live not
only in forgiveness but in a life dedicated to blessing and uplifting others.


Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. (Luke 6:27-28 NIV)

What about you and me? Do we believe God can bring good out of the bad things that have happened to us?
Are we willing to allow God to bless others, even our enemies, as we tell our story of God’s redeeming love for us?

Prayer: Heavenly Father, Help me to learn from St Patrick’s example that Your extravagant love is more than enough to overcome the deepest hurts in my life. Help me to let go of resentments and offer forgiveness to others. I want to bless others as You have blessed me. Amen

©2022 Partners in Hope
 
Mar 16, 2022
61
19
8
Im just grateful when I finally made into AA the steps were uncomplicated and fewest words ..... .
also went to a few NA meetings with people I knew even though alcohol was my chosen substance.....
.......only went to a few because their textbook had gone through three revisions and it was mass confusion and people weren't reading from the same books.
..........made me think I don't know how these folk will ever stay clean.......
.........so only AA for me after that.....100 meetings in 100 days to start off......
I worked it and it worked.
Honestly though I was a bit of a tough nut to crack....
........took me 9 months on my knees to get my moral inventory done.......
.......But the good Lord was faithful to keep me sober one day at a time like I asked and thanked him for.
..... I wasn't church raised but had a childrens bible and the fundamental. Truth exposure
and didn't suffer from higher power confusion.....The God of my understanding was Our Father who art in heaven and our savior Jesus Christ.....
..........When I finally completed my moral inventory and prayed over it.....his Holy Spirit came and washed it all away.
Healed me baptized me and removed the obsession to think insanely...........
.........I knew real gratitude and Peace serenity and love for the first time......1987........
........I understood that if God loved me and my worthless life that much......to come and heal me......as long as I continued to trust in him it didn't matter what happened the rest of my life......
..........Because he had saved my life......and it belonged to him.😀
......it takes whatever it takes for each of us to turn our will and life over to him.......we choose where are bottom is and when we are finally sick and tired of being sick and tired.......for me it took 7 dui blackouts dt's hallucinations failed relations shame etc.
..........I think if God could love a drunken fornicator like me then he can and does love everyone......
Keep coming back it works if you work it!!!
.......Fake it till you make it if you need to!!!
K.I.S.S.........keep it simple stupid!!!
When that stinking thinking starts.....tell it get thee behind me satan.. . ...and if that's not God......get out!!!
You can overcome by the loving mercy and true amazing grace of God one breath one step at a time.
..........line upon line precept on precept step after step......
By his Grace and for his Glory!
All praise be his!!!😀



This is what I needed today! Thank you for your journey, thank you for sharing....Thank you!
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
FRIDAY MARCH 18, 2022 - HOLDING ON TO HOPE
Audio for HOLDING ON TO HOPE


When we are hoping to attend a scheduled event we often rely on another person to do something that will enable us to get to the event. An illustration would be trusting someone to purchase the tickets for us so that we can attend. Our hope is focused on getting to the event, so we would not trust just anyone to get the tickets but instead would choose someone we know we could rely on. What is our hope for today and who can we trust to help us fulfill that hope?

Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise.
Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. (Hebrews 10:23-24 NLT)


Through faith in the finished work of Jesus, we are assured of our place with Him in the Kingdom of God. In fact, Jesus is the only way we can get a “ticket” to the fulfillment of all God’s promises to us. The love that God has for us gives us hope and a future and we will never be disappointed. Liberation from sin gives us the assurance that all God’s promises to us are a definite “Yes” because His seal of ownership is on us and His Spirit is in our hearts.

My dear friends, we are already God’s children, though what we will be hasn’t yet been seen. But we do know that when Christ returns, we will be like him, because we will see him as he truly is. This hope makes us keep ourselves holy, just as Christ is holy. (1 John 3:2-3 CEV)

Do we have hope to be like Jesus when He returns? To be like Him, we need to know what He is like.
We need to improve our conscious contact with God through prayer and meditation on the Scriptures
and learn about Jesus and why He came into the world not to judge it, but to save it.


All who have this hope in him purify themselves, just as he is pure. (1 John 3:3 NIV)

Prayer: Loving God, Thank You for the hope I have in You. Please help me get rid of all my impure desires
and lusts and be transformed by the renewing of my mind, so that each day I can be more like Jesus. Amen


©2022 Partners in Hope
 
Mar 16, 2022
61
19
8
Thank you for the inclusion.....

I attended an AA meeting once, knew of the step program. Looked it up online, step 1admit a problem and we have no power over it! I have been journaling that one step for months now. Have I gone back to the meetings, not yet. I am very aware of needing to be sober minded as a Christian, the roaring lion is out there to take me out...I know that. I have had times when I should have died. Please keep me in your prayers as I know why and what I need to do....I have no excuses....I just haven't done it. Again thank you for sharing and the inclusion in the commentary. Have a blessed day.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
Thank you for the inclusion.....

I attended an AA meeting once, knew of the step program. Looked it up online, step 1admit a problem and we have no power over it! I have been journaling that one step for months now. Have I gone back to the meetings, not yet. I am very aware of needing to be sober minded as a Christian, the roaring lion is out there to take me out...I know that. I have had times when I should have died. Please keep me in your prayers as I know why and what I need to do....I have no excuses....I just haven't done it. Again thank you for sharing and the inclusion in the commentary. Have a blessed day.
You are welcome! I am glad you found this thread :) You may find more hope and encouragement by reading through some of the back entries and posts as well. I am a long-time member of various 12 step fellowships, though I have not attended in person for some time due to COVID and other health issues and concerns. If you have already put down the mind and mood altering substances, you have made a very good start :D Many do not understand that God is at the heart of the 12 step program, but even hard-core atheists will attend meetings (despite any "God talk" and multiple mentions of Him in the steps), and come to believe over time because they find so much to relate to, and much support in the fellowship and literature. Plus, God's promises are true! :love:

 
Mar 16, 2022
61
19
8
I am still struggling with completely putting the whiskey down.....I have gone up to 30 days w/o. Funny, step one says admit a problem, sadly I can't say that right now. I a praying that being open and honest here will give me the strength in my faith in Jesus that I can end this addiction. First time I have ever said I have an addiction, always said I have a problem........
 

Bingo

Well-known member
Feb 9, 2019
9,422
4,837
113
"A check-list to consider. An honest evaluation rest on your conscious."

Untitled - Copy.png
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,149
30,296
113
I am still struggling with completely putting the whiskey down.....I have gone up to 30 days w/o. Funny, step one says admit a problem, sadly I can't say that right now. I a praying that being open and honest here will give me the strength in my faith in Jesus that I can end this addiction. First time I have ever said I have an addiction, always said I have a problem........
I did not see your post until just now... and I can relate! I did not think I had a problem with drugs and alcohol either, because I liked drinking and drugging. That is not to say I did not get into trouble, because I most certainly did: hospitalized a number of times, ODs, alcohol poisoning, not to mention doing stupid things while intoxicated, which luckily never landed me in jail or dead, and generally/overall not making wise choices in my life. Being gainfully employed I could keep a roof over my head and pay my bills, so I did not think I fit the profile of an addict or alcoholic despite my many high risk behaviors.

Step one does not say we admitted we had a problem; it says we admitted we were powerless over alcohol, and that our lives had become unmanageable. I went to AA meetings for many years before I could admit I was an alcoholic. In fact, I was eighteen months clean and sober before I embraced the fact that I was not just powerless (I had known that I was powerless over people, places, and things for a long time) over drugs and incapable of managing my own life, but that I was indeed an alcoholic, and that addiction in one form or other had run rampant in my life. It probably would have whether I had I ever picked up a drug or not (alcohol is a drug).

So kudos to you for admitting you have an addiction. The more you understand about the "disease," the more you will understand how it has surreptitiously but dynamically operated in your life as a self-destructive force. As a Christian it is so easy to see the enemy at work in that way. I was not Christian when I got clean and sober, but I was living in a great deal of emotional pain and cried out to God for help. I was attending AA meetings but still drinking... and also going to emotions anonymous. I had been in counselling too, but always sought to keep my drinking and drugging hidden from those I was seeking help from because I did not want to be told I had to stop what I was doing. It was my escape and I did not want to give it up!

So even though I did not think I had a problem with drugs and alcohol despite all the problems they caused in my life, and had not thought I wanted to stop? After crying out to God for help, within days I was directed to the NA program, put down the mind and mood altering substances, got clean and sober, and started working the steps as if my life depended on it, because by then, I knew it really did.
 

JaumeJ

Senior Member
Jul 2, 2011
21,465
6,722
113
I did not see your post until just now... and I can relate! I did not think I had a problem with drugs and alcohol either, because I liked drinking and drugging. That is not to say I did not get into trouble, because I most certainly did: hospitalized a number of times, ODs, alcohol poisoning, not to mention doing stupid things while intoxicated, which luckily never landed me in jail or dead, and generally/overall not making wise choices in my life. Being gainfully employed I could keep a roof over my head and pay my bills, so I did not think I fit the profile of an addict or alcoholic despite my many high risk behaviors.

Step one does not say we admitted we had a problem; it says we admitted we were powerless over alcohol, and that our lives had become unmanageable. I went to AA meetings for many years before I could admit I was an alcoholic. In fact, I was eighteen months clean and sober before I embraced the fact that I was not just powerless (I had known that I was powerless over people, places, and things for a long time) over drugs and incapable of managing my own life, but that I was indeed an alcoholic, and that addiction in one form or other had run rampant in my life. It probably would have whether I had I ever picked up a drug or not (alcohol is a drug).

So kudos to you for admitting you have an addiction. The more you understand about the "disease," the more you will understand how it has surreptitiously but dynamically operated in your life as a self-destructive force. As a Christian it is so easy to see the enemy at work in that way. I was not Christian when I got clean and sober, but I was living in a great deal of emotional pain and cried out to God for help. I was attending AA meetings but still drinking... and also going to emotions anonymous. I had been in counselling too, but always sought to keep my drinking and drugging hidden from those I was seeking help from because I did not want to be told I had to stop what I was doing. It was my escape and I did not want to give it up!

So even though I did not think I had a problem with drugs and alcohol despite all the problems they caused in my life, and had not thought I wanted to stop? After crying out to God for help, within days I was directed to the NA program, put down the mind and mood altering substances, got clean and sober, and started working the steps as if my life depended on it, because by then, I knew it really did.
Obviously the Lord has taken you out of thatt time of suffering and misguided time converting you into the angel of help for me and many others.

I will forget this about your past for we are here today, and you have been very special from the Lord just for me. You are appreciated as a solid family member of the Body of Yeshua by all whom you have helped.

Thank you Magenta for being here for so many in Jesus Yeshua.