How do I find a super shy introvert wife?

Ah. I don't know. Each woman is different and will have their own reasons to pick me (or not). I can't really tell.

But if anything the real question would be whether she would accept or reject my offer. Because I expect to be the one who picks her, not vice versa. Furthermore I pretty much doubt that a shy woman would be the active part in a relationship.

If you don’t know, then you are not ready to find a wife. Find out who you are and what you have to offer first. The real question is why would any women want a conditional marriage?

No thanks. I want a white woman, and that's a requirement I won't give up. I don't want ugly mixed race children with weird eyes, so Asian women for you.

That said, it's interesting that you are in a Christian forum, and that none of the countries you suggest are of Christian tradition. Yes sure these countries will have their own small Christian communities, but then just like Syria or Egypt, or Turkmenistan would, and I pretty much doubt you would ever think about these countries as examples. If you mentioned at least Philippines I could have found a bit more of reason in your argument.

And another thing is that, from what I heard these women are not that rare to find in certain parts of Europe either. And they are white and Christian, unlike the ones you talk about.

Sorry if I have been a bit rude with this post, but think about it.

I understand the thought of seeking out women in Asian countries, as this seems to be the long-standing advice that has always been given to men who are looking for "submissive wives with traditional values."

I just think that most men who do so don't truly realize what those traditional values entail.

I'm certainly no expert, but over the years, I've known about 10 situations involving such couples (a bride brought in from another country) or I knew the child of such a marriage.

And the pattern was always the same: the man wanted a beautiful, sweet, submissive, loving stay-at-home wife with traditional values.

And what he failed to realize in each case is that he was taking a young woman away from the very family who had given her those traditional values, from a culture that might emphasize family much more so than his own, and didn't realize just how challenging that really is.

The top problems I have seen in these marriages have been:

1. She's cut off from her family, and over time, will become depressed and unhappy. It can't be expected that she will be in good spirits once taken away from her family, culture, friends, native language, and everything familiar to her. It must be considered that she will need a way to stay in touch with, and most likely go back and periodically visit her country on a regular basis, or to bring her family to your country to visit as often as possible.

2. This will become even more apparent if the couple has children. Traditional family values in such countries means that grandparents are to be part of the children's lives growing up, and in many cases, the mother-in-law expects to come live with the family to help raise the babies in their formative years, at the very least.

3. Her traditional family may expect you help support them (as is customary in such countries -- offspring support their parents, at the very least, if not other members as well.) You may find yourself supporting not only her, but a good number of her family members as well. And it won't be seen as gold-digging -- it will be seen as part of traditional values. Likewise, she may expect that as her parents age, you will provide for them to come and live with you. In Asian countries, it is expected that you will take care of your parents, which usually means having them live with you.

4. You will most likely encounter prejudice. I know a girl who is constantly asked, "So, are you a bad (member of her country) or a good one?" And she says that people don't really care what the answer is, because they usually just assume she's one of the "bad" ones. As much as I wish things were different these days, they just aren't, and if your children are mixed, people will certainly voice their opinions to both you and them about that fact -- often in not-so-nice ways.

5. There are a lot of cultural differences when it comes to raising children. What might be seen as abuse in one country is seen as normal everyday child-rearing in another. Physical discipline in other countries that is seen as abuse here may be seen as a normal part of parenting according to her own traditional values.

I am not trying to discourage anyone from going after what they wish for in a spouse, especially if that's where God is leading them.

But I've seen many cases in which the person seeking such a wife never even considered these things until they happened, and it certainly did not make for a very happy or stable marriage.

I would strongly encourage anyone looking into this to do some research and preparation before taking the leap.

No thanks. I want a white woman, and that's a requirement I won't give up. I don't want ugly mixed race children with weird eyes, so Asian women for you.

That said, it's interesting that you are in a Christian forum, and that none of the countries you suggest are of Christian tradition. Yes sure these countries will have their own small Christian communities, but then just like Syria or Egypt, or Turkmenistan would, and I pretty much doubt you would ever think about these countries as examples. If you mentioned at least Philippines I could have found a bit more of reason in your argument.

And another thing is that, from what I heard these women are not that rare to find in certain parts of Europe either. And they are white and Christian, unlike the ones you talk about.

Sorry if I have been a bit rude with this post, but think about it.

I don't want ugly mixed race children with weird eyes, so Asian women for you.

Sorry if I have been a bit rude with this post, but think about it.

No thanks. I want a white woman, and that's a requirement I won't give up. I don't want ugly mixed race children with weird eyes, so Asian women for you.

That said, it's interesting that you are in a Christian forum, and that none of the countries you suggest are of Christian tradition. Yes sure these countries will have their own small Christian communities, but then just like Syria or Egypt, or Turkmenistan would, and I pretty much doubt you would ever think about these countries as examples. If you mentioned at least Philippines I could have found a bit more of reason in your argument.

And another thing is that, from what I heard these women are not that rare to find in certain parts of Europe either. And they are white and Christian, unlike the ones you talk about.

Sorry if I have been a bit rude with this post, but think about it.

No thanks. I want a white woman, and that's a requirement I won't give up. I don't want ugly mixed race children with weird eyes, so Asian women for you.

That said, it's interesting that you are in a Christian forum, and that none of the countries you suggest are of Christian tradition. Yes sure these countries will have their own small Christian communities, but then just like Syria or Egypt, or Turkmenistan would, and I pretty much doubt you would ever think about these countries as examples. If you mentioned at least Philippines I could have found a bit more of reason in your argument.

And another thing is that, from what I heard these women are not that rare to find in certain parts of Europe either. And they are white and Christian, unlike the ones you talk about.

Sorry if I have been a bit rude with this post, but think about it.

Oh, I totally didn’t expect you to be racist. That’s sad.

Oh, I totally didn’t expect you to be racist. That’s sad.

From what I have heard the Bible Belt states of the US have divorce rates above the national average, so it should be clear that something is not going well on there.

Also is your Vietnamese girlfriend a Christian?

It was a hallmark in one of the other threads as well, particularly against the Jews.

The next time a thread like this gets posted again, suggesting a non-white wife and then seeing what response is given will be a simple litmus test.

It took a little bit of digging, but I found the other threads I had told you about that sound EXACTLY like yours.

@Quietmann, if you are sincere about your inquiry, please take the time to read at least the first couple pages of these threads.

I would also encourage anyone considering spending their precious spare time answering this thread to take a minute and glance over these other threads as a comparison.

May I present:

https://christianchat.com/christian...ere-single-christian-girls-in-finland.200207/

https://christianchat.com/christian...d-christian-girl-from-france-to-marry.199441/

https://christianchat.com/christian-young-adults-forum/will-i-ever-get-a-good-wife-of-christ.201663/

"Members" who presented these threads, in order:

1. Kauko (last seen August, 2021)

2. FrenchandChristian (banned)

3. Zdenek (expressed racist opinions against the Jews -- and was banned)

As I said, @Quietmann, these users asked exactly the same questions as you and had the exact same attitudes about women. If you are truly someone different, take a look at the advice that has already been given multiple times in these other threads.

I will also add your thread to ever-growing list of those that are asking these exact same questions because it seems inevitable that the questions you are asking are going to be asked over and over again by a steady stream of "new members." Every time we see a thread like this, I will try my best to post a list of these threads for other members to consider before answering.

Something else to note is that by the third incarnation of this inquiry, the original poster skipped over acknowledging members who had answered before and only addressed (fed on the attention of) newcomers who had not posted in his before. As I mentioned these "members" simply fed on the attention of anyone they could pull into a circular argument.

Things that make you go "Hmm..."

Uh I see that my post has been not well received.

This was just my personal opinion, having seen several of them. But of course, a mixed race person can turn out to have a better soul than an outwardly beautiful unmixed person.

It's ironic that you either don't realize or blatantly ignore that a good number of your audience here are from mixed families.

You're insulting most of the people you are trying to solicit advice from.

It was a hallmark in one of the other threads as well, particularly against the Jews.

The next time a thread like this gets posted again, suggesting a non-white wife and then seeing what response is given will be a simple litmus test.

It seems that you are really annoyed with those posters you told me about.

What you don't seem to realize is that the more you feed them the more they will attack you.

If you dislike them so much then just ignore them. As if they didn't exist. It's sure a better alternative than whining on them all over the thread.