Where is the Gentleness and Humility?

I’m dismayed at how so many so called ‘believers’ interact in these Chat forums--not all but several interact with arrogance, condescension, and sarcasm--I’m truly surprised that these individuals are not warned or banned from the site. Debating a point can and ought to be done with kindness and gentleness--there is no reason to be rude. We are called to be salt and light in the world--if an unbeliever were to read some of the posts, I can’t imagine they’d want anything to do with Christianity. Also, it seems they often argue/debate simply for the sake of arguing, not to glorify God or to bring light to Truth--they go round and round--it’s like beating a dead horse. And note too, if you call these ‘believers’ out on it, instead of being apologetic, they, like the Pharisees and Sadducees become defensive.


“12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”--Colossians 3:12


“2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”--Ephesians 4:2


“5 In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”--1st Peter 5:5


11 For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

I’m dismayed at how so many so called ‘believers’ interact in these Chat forums--not all but several interact with arrogance, condescension, and sarcasm--I’m truly surprised that these individuals are not warned or banned from the site. Debating a point can and ought to be done with kindness and gentleness--there is no reason to be rude. We are called to be salt and light in the world--if an unbeliever were to read some of the posts, I can’t imagine they’d want anything to do with Christianity. Also, it seems they often argue/debate simply for the sake of arguing, not to glorify God or to bring light to Truth--they go round and round--it’s like beating a dead horse. And note too, if you call these ‘believers’ out on it, instead of being apologetic, they, like the Pharisees and Sadducees become defensive.

“12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”--Colossians 3:12

“2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”--Ephesians 4:2

“5 In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”--1st Peter 5:5

11 For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

The BDF can be a hostile environment that's for sure.

What is your position on sin after we are saved.

If you say we cannot abstain from sin then you should not be upset to those that post wrongly in behavior for we cannot abstain from sin.

If you say we can abstain from sin then you can point it out concerning their wrong behavior.

Some people will say we cannot abstain from sin completely and we sin every day but then they belittle people and get on their case harshly that claim to be with Christ for their bad behavior posts and if they are homosexual.

But if we cannot abstain from sin completely then why do they bother people that are posting wrongly.

The Bible says if we allow the Spirit to lead us we can abstain from sin so only those that believe this and live by it would be able to tell others of their wrongful behavior.

And if they do not believe it then they have no right to belittle those who post wrongly for they cannot abstain from sin.

Montana, please quote were I said we can't sin. Please quote were I belittled someone. There is nothing wrong with pointing out wrong -please show me a verse that disproves your point. It is people like you on this site --argumentative and emotional, always playing the devils advocate without stating the thing that you are addressing--I'm guessing you are one of the posters who seek to cause strife. And apparently don't actually take the time to read what someone actually posted.

You said:

"The Bible says if we allow the Spirit to lead us we can abstain from sin so only those that believe this and live by it would be able to tell others of their wrongful behavior."-

Please show me me what bible verse you are referrring to--also you don't know where I am in my walk as we are complete strangers. Paul said "The thing I hate I do" yet he admonished the believers. Any believer can admonish--we are all imperfect--otherwise none could say anything to anyone, not even a pastor

--Now you are the one judging me and ironically by saying I am judging others.

Montana, please quote were I said we can't sin. Please quote were I belittled someone. There is nothing wrong with pointing out wrong -please show me a verse that disproves your point. It is people like you on this site --argumentative and emotional, always playing the devils advocate without stating the thing that you are addressing--I'm guessing you are one of the posters who seek to cause strife. And apparently don't actually take the time to read what someone actually posted.

You said:

"The Bible says if we allow the Spirit to lead us we can abstain from sin so only those that believe this and live by it would be able to tell others of their wrongful behavior."-

Seriously? Please show me your bible verse. Paul said "The thing I hate I do" and he admonished the believers. We can speak the truth--now YOU are the one judging me and ironically by saying I am judging others.

Amen, Totally agree, so:

Precious friends, I sincerely apologize IF I have disobeyed God and offended anyone I have talked with here:

Ephesians 4:29 "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister GRACE unto the hearers."

Rom_12:18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live Peaceably with all men.

Gal_6:10 As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

1Th_3:12 And The LORD make you to increase and abound in love one toward another, and toward all men, even as we do toward you:

1Th_5:15 See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men.

1Ti_2:1 I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men;

Tit_3:2 To speak evil of no man, to be no brawlers, but gentle, shewing all meekness unto all men.

Thanks So Much, all Precious friends.

(2 Timothy 2:15; Romans 16:25; Ephesians 1:3-9; Ephesians 3:9 =
Grace/Mystery fellowship {Romans – Philemon}, For ALL, today?)

Please Be Richly Encouraged, Enlightened, Exhorted, and Edified!
God’s Simple Will!

My post has nothing to do with you, and you doing anything wrong, and I am not saying you are judging anyone.

I do not know your position of what you believe so how can I judge or jump to conclusions.

This is speaking in general concerning what a person believes for if they believe they cannot abstain from sin then they cannot talk about the bad behavior of others.

I am new hear and I do not know what you believe.

Mat 7:1 Judge not, that ye be not judged.
Mat 7:2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
Mat 7:3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?
Mat 7:4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye?
Mat 7:5 Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.

If you do believe that you cannot abstain from sin then you cannot point out people's bad behavior in their posts for that is sin but they cannot abstain from sin.

But I do not know what you believe.

I am sorry for the post and will not quote you anymore.

The Bible disagrees with you. No where does the Bible say to cut off people from your life who are not gentle, humble, or are rude.

Precious friend, then how do you interpret What CHRIST Instructed Paul?:

Rom 16:17 "Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them."

Seems pretty clear to me...

I’m dismayed at how so many so called ‘believers’ interact in these Chat forums--not all but several interact with arrogance, condescension, and sarcasm--I’m truly surprised that these individuals are not warned or banned from the site. Debating a point can and ought to be done with kindness and gentleness--there is no reason to be rude. We are called to be salt and light in the world--if an unbeliever were to read some of the posts, I can’t imagine they’d want anything to do with Christianity. Also, it seems they often argue/debate simply for the sake of arguing, not to glorify God or to bring light to Truth--they go round and round--it’s like beating a dead horse. And note too, if you call these ‘believers’ out on it, instead of being apologetic, they, like the Pharisees and Sadducees become defensive.

“12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”--Colossians 3:12

“2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”--Ephesians 4:2

“5 In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”--1st Peter 5:5

11 For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

Dear RA, I completely agree that we can take a strong stance when it is needed-however, that isn't what I was saying--again it is about repeated 'reviling' of what other's post in the forum. The pagans deserved the refutations they received--but amongst believers there is no need for rudeness and condescension.

Hi Laura,
You draw a distinction here between "refutation" and "rudeness and condescension". What do you propose when what is intended as a non-emotional refutation is received as "rudeness and condescension"? Do you consider the accusation sufficient to prove guilt, or is the intention where the issue must be judged?

The only rhing I can point you to is the English dictionary if you dont know the difference between rudeness and refutation. Refutation used facts and does not attack the person. Rudeness attacks the person, rather than the argument presented.

Interesting response.

Frankly, I find it rude and condescending, and it fails completely to answer my question.

She is an asset to the board.
Really good solid member

Interesting response.

Frankly, I find it rude and condescending, and it fails completely to answer my question.

Hi Laura,
You draw a distinction here between "refutation" and "rudeness and condescension". What do you propose when what is intended as a non-emotional refutation is received as "rudeness and condescension"? Do you consider the accusation sufficient to prove guilt, or is the intention where the issue must be judged?

Thank you for your very kind words

I find it interesting that those who complain about people criticizing others
often have no trouble giving themselves permission to do the very same thing

But I do not care to walk around the mine field of such eggshells.

Magenta, where did I criticize--your pointing out a definition--which has a variety of meaning--so it must be defined in its context --in the post where the person said I was complaining, they were discounting what I had said), so it was unkind, since you were not addressing the topic--I'm new to this site and the rudeness I've experienced is both hurtful and upsetting. Btw, I apologized to you in my previous post and noted your kindness in welcoming those in the NEW forum.