Why Don't We Hear About Single Christian Women Looking for Husbands in Other Countries?

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proverbs35

Senior Member
Nov 10, 2012
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#41
I've seen some episodes. I am not sure if I have seen a whole season yet. What kind of unrealistic expectations are you referring to?



There may be some percentage of younger men, maybe the ones on the tail end of the bell curve, who are attracted to older women. Maybe they want a mother figure for whatever reason. I have seen bits and pieces of the show and there were interviews with a young man from Africa who kept talking about how much he wanted to go to America while discussing his relationship with the woman. There was one of the men who married a woman who might have been in her 40's who ditched her after a short time.

Many of the relatives on the show suggest the foreigner just wants a Greencard. On the one hand, that may be the case for some of them. But it also highlights the thinking of some Americans that America has such great opportunity that all the foreigners want to go to the US just to work. There are some foreigners like that, but it makes sense that some of the young couples who met while the expat was travelling for an extended period of time or dated online could want to marry for the same reasons other couples do.

I might be a just a little more suspicious about the motives of the men marrying the older women. I am not sure about the percentage of expat and Filippina relationships where the man is quite older, but there seems to be a fair amount of older expats marrying Filippinas. The age gap was probably less when there was a military base there. Maybe the Filippines got a reputation as a place to get young wives, or maybe some of these older men had been in the navy way back.

Some people say Filippinas comes over to the US to scam men for Greencards. I have no idea the source, but I read on a website that about 25% of couples where the wife was a Filippina expat divorced. This poster pointed out that about 50% of marriages with local US women divorce, and he asked. who who are the real scam artists?

In some of the more traditional cultures, men want to have children. The young men marrying the older women may be giving that up, or giving up having children while they are young, if they are serious about staying together until one of them dies. But the woman who marries an old man might still expect to have children, since that could be normal in her own country even if her husband is old.

There are also people who might marry partly because the partner or moving to America could provide a better life, who are also serious about making a commitment for life. A lot of Americans tend to think of marriage as disposable if it doesn't make them happy. People from some of these other countries may be more likely to see marriage was permanent, which is one reason why some of the men go looking abroad.
Unrealistic expectations...

If you have watched any portion of 90 Day Fiance, you should know what I mean by unrealistic expectations. It's really cut and dry.

Unrealistic expectations of women,

Most of the American women that I've seen on that show are over 50 pursuing younger foreign men. As I stated earlier, there are huge obstacles: racial, religious, cultural and economic differences.

Relationships are hard if you have those things in common. If you have different religious beliefs, cultures, financial ideas, it is a recipe for disaster.

Several of the older women (over 50) I mentioned seem very illiterate about the man's religion, cultural traditions, racial heritage, financial standing. They don't even educate themselves about these things before making a decision to potentially marry these men. To be honest, the ladies seem to be in heat (passion) more than anything else. After all, they are not pursuing older American men. They are pursuing half their age very strapping, young men. To be honest, I've noticed several over 50 white American women pursuing much younger African men. Perhaps, they are living out a fantasy. I think it's ridiculous, but they are simply doing what older American men have done for years - seek out younger foreign wives - mail order brides. However, for some many reasons, it does not work out for women the way it has for the men.

Unrealistic expectations of older American men ...

The older American men on 90 Day Fiance are usually the one who pay out a lot of money in hopes of snaring a young foreign wife preferably in her very early 20s. One man claiming to have paid 1 million dollars to various young foreign women around the globe, yet he is still not married. Creepy ...

Big Ed is on the current season. He was born with a birth defect. He literally has no neck. He is very short, and he lied to the woman about his height. He pursued a 23 yr old Philippine woman from a very impoverished area. Promised her a better life in America. Upon meeting her, this man who has his own disability (flaws) belittled Rose on more than one occasion and took her to a hotel for relations. He thought she was willing to put up with his boarish behavior if it meant escaping poverty. She has a son who he showed little interest in getting to know. Had he married Rose, he would have been the child's stepfather. Rose broke off the engagement.

Unrealistic expectations
This man who is physically disabled (has his own imperfections) thought he could mistreat (verbally abuse) a potential wife just because he holds the purse strings. It did not work out like he thought.

Realistic expectation ...

Men and women should treat each with respect.
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
#42
The vast majority of Indonesians I have known who were married to foreigners were married to people who seemed to be close in age. I didn't ask. I may have seen a few expat men married to younger women...maybe one that I can think of. Certain women in Jakarta really like expats. Some would be open to a relationship with a foreigner, but don't insist on it. One of my wife's cousins kept saying she wanted to marry a Japanese man, but then she married someone from the same people-group.

How common is it for Indians to marry foreigners? Is it usually the wealther classes who study abroad who end up marrying foreigners? Are there expat men going there and marrying the lower economic classes and poorer castes? Does the cast system deter Indians from marrying foreigners? What about among Christians?
Indian online dating/matrimonial is big and from what I understand many Indian women are willing to marry Indians living abroad and move there. It is rare for Indian women from India to marry non-Indian foreigners. A lot of Indian men living abroad also don't mind marrying an Indian wife from India. Based on conversations I've noticed that the standards for an Indian wife has increased. In the old days, a pretty submissive simple village girl would be fine. However, now Indian men in the U.S. want successful/educated Indian women from India who would continue working here, rather than be an housewife. One of my friends was complaining that most of the Indian women he speaks with (either through online or through family connections) are approaching 30; so once they get to the U.S. they will need a couple of years to get U.S. accreditation, etc. (for example, if she was a doctor in India) so by then they are in early/mid 30s and getting started in their careers, and cannot have too many children. So, I've observed Indian men want the whole package which isn't always possible (young wife in her 20s who is highly educated with good career prospects in a high-earning field, who is also willing to have three children).
I myself am not too plugged in into Indian culture as I was raised in the U.S. and also being Christian. Indian Christians do not really look into caste. Generally I think a lot of Indians are racist, especially those in the upper castes, and they still consider caste in marriage.
 
K

Kim82

Guest
#43
A woman who marries a charming younger man who brings nothing to the table, should definitely get a prenup.
 
K

Kim82

Guest
#44
Some people think money can buy them everything. No it can't. And yes they are unrealistic and in denial.
 
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#45
Just like ancient Israel, their foreign lovers beguiled their hearts away from the Lord God Most High. They mingled their peoples to the confusion of their children's faces. They entreated one another as whores. All this have the wicked generations done without an ounce of remorse. They cannot even acknowledge the shame of their doings, this is how wicked they are. This is how great civilizations die.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#46
A woman who marries a charming younger man who brings nothing to the table, should definitely get a prenup.
A woman who did that probably would not think that way.

Prenups signal a lack of trust-- betting on divorce. It only makes sense for believers if they need to set up inheritance issues for if one or both spouses die, also.

"I'll marry you, but only if you sign this document that says you get nothing if you divorce me" is an insulting thing to say.

In the US, typically men have more to lose from divorce, since there is a bias towards women when judges give custody of the children, and along with that goes child support.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#47
Just like ancient Israel, their foreign lovers beguiled their hearts away from the Lord God Most High. They mingled their peoples to the confusion of their children's faces. They entreated one another as whores. All this have the wicked generations done without an ounce of remorse. They cannot even acknowledge the shame of their doings, this is how wicked they are. This is how great civilizations die.
I am aware of no law in the Bible against Gentile nations intermarrying with one another. It was not forbidden in the Torah for Israelite men to marry all foreign women, just women from certain nations, unless they were descendants of Aaron.
 
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#48
I am aware of no law in the Bible against Gentile nations intermarrying with one another. It was not forbidden in the Torah for Israelite men to marry all foreign women, just women from certain nations, unless they were descendants of Aaron.

Numbers 25

1 And Israel abode in Shittim, and the people began to commit whoredom with the daughters of Moab.

2 And they called the people unto the sacrifices of their gods: and the people did eat, and bowed down to their gods.

3 And Israel joined himself unto Baalpeor: and the anger of the Lord was kindled against Israel.

4 And the Lord said unto Moses, Take all the heads of the people, and hang them up before the Lord against the sun, that the fierce anger of the Lord may be turned away from Israel.

5 And Moses said unto the judges of Israel, Slay ye every one his men that were joined unto Baalpeor.

6 And, behold, one of the children of Israel came and brought unto his brethren a Midianitish woman in the sight of Moses, and in the sight of all the congregation of the children of Israel, who were weeping before the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.

7 And when Phinehas, the son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron the priest, saw it, he rose up from among the congregation, and took a javelin in his hand;

8 And he went after the man of Israel into the tent, and thrust both of them through, the man of Israel, and the woman through her belly. So the plague was stayed from the children of Israel.

9 And those that died in the plague were twenty and four thousand.

10 And the Lord spake unto Moses, saying,

11 Phinehas, the son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron the priest, hath turned my wrath away from the children of Israel, while he was zealous for my sake among them, that I consumed not the children of Israel in my jealousy.

12 Wherefore say, Behold, I give unto him my covenant of peace:

13 And he shall have it, and his seed after him, even the covenant of an everlasting priesthood; because he was zealous for his God, and made an atonement for the children of Israel.

14 Now the name of the Israelite that was slain, even that was slain with the Midianitish woman, was Zimri, the son of Salu, a prince of a chief house among the Simeonites.

15 And the name of the Midianitish woman that was slain was Cozbi, the daughter of Zur; he was head over a people, and of a chief house in Midian.

16 And the Lord spake unto Moses, saying,

17 Vex the Midianites, and smite them:

18 For they vex you with their wiles, wherewith they have beguiled you in the matter of Peor, and in the matter of Cozbi, the daughter of a prince of Midian, their sister, which was slain in the day of the plague for Peor's sake.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#49
Of course I will deny Babylon and her children, I will not drink their cup. Those that drink from her cup get her reward. Those that follow Lord Jesus get his reward. Praise Jesus.
Getting rewards is not my motivation in my intention to humbly serving the Lord. The truth is, any rewards or crowns that I may received are unmerited anyway. I sure don't deserve any and I'm not looking for any.
 

tourist

Senior Member
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#50
Of course I will deny Babylon and her children, I will not drink their cup. Those that drink from her cup get her reward. Those that follow Lord Jesus get his reward. Praise Jesus.
What does all of this mean anyway. Sounds like a bunch of nonsense.
 
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#51
What does all of this mean anyway. Sounds like a bunch of nonsense.
Revelation 17:1-6
1 And there came one of the seven angels which had the seven vials, and talked with me, saying unto me, Come hither; I will shew unto thee the judgment of the great whore that sitteth upon many waters:

2 With whom the kings of the earth have committed fornication, and the inhabitants of the earth have been made drunk with the wine of her fornication.

3 So he carried me away in the spirit into the wilderness: and I saw a woman sit upon a scarlet coloured beast, full of names of blasphemy, having seven heads and ten horns.

4 And the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication:

5 And upon her forehead was a name written, Mystery, Babylon The Great, The Mother Of Harlots And Abominations Of The Earth.

6 And I saw the woman drunken with the blood of the saints, and with the blood of the martyrs of Jesus: and when I saw her, I wondered with great admiration.


Revelation 19:1-8

1 And after these things I saw another angel come down from heaven, having great power; and the earth was lightened with his glory.

2 And he cried mightily with a strong voice, saying, Babylon the great is fallen, is fallen, and is become the habitation of devils, and the hold of every foul spirit, and a cage of every unclean and hateful bird.

3 For all nations have drunk of the wine of the wrath of her fornication, and the kings of the earth have committed fornication with her, and the merchants of the earth are waxed rich through the abundance of her delicacies.

4 And I heard another voice from heaven, saying, Come out of her, my people, that ye be not partakers of her sins, and that ye receive not of her plagues.

5 For her sins have reached unto heaven, and God hath remembered her iniquities.

6 Reward her even as she rewarded you, and double unto her double according to her works: in the cup which she hath filled fill to her double.

7 How much she hath glorified herself, and lived deliciously, so much torment and sorrow give her: for she saith in her heart, I sit a queen, and am no widow, and shall see no sorrow.

8 Therefore shall her plagues come in one day, death, and mourning, and famine; and she shall be utterly burned with fire: for strong is the Lord God who judgeth her.
 

tourist

Senior Member
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#52
Revelation 17:1-6
1 And there came one of the seven angels which had the seven vials, and talked with me, saying unto me, Come hither; I will shew unto thee the judgment of the great whore that sitteth upon many waters:

2 With whom the kings of the earth have committed fornication, and the inhabitants of the earth have been made drunk with the wine of her fornication.

3 So he carried me away in the spirit into the wilderness: and I saw a woman sit upon a scarlet coloured beast, full of names of blasphemy, having seven heads and ten horns.

4 And the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication:

5 And upon her forehead was a name written, Mystery, Babylon The Great, The Mother Of Harlots And Abominations Of The Earth.

6 And I saw the woman drunken with the blood of the saints, and with the blood of the martyrs of Jesus: and when I saw her, I wondered with great admiration.


Revelation 19:1-8

1 And after these things I saw another angel come down from heaven, having great power; and the earth was lightened with his glory.

2 And he cried mightily with a strong voice, saying, Babylon the great is fallen, is fallen, and is become the habitation of devils, and the hold of every foul spirit, and a cage of every unclean and hateful bird.

3 For all nations have drunk of the wine of the wrath of her fornication, and the kings of the earth have committed fornication with her, and the merchants of the earth are waxed rich through the abundance of her delicacies.

4 And I heard another voice from heaven, saying, Come out of her, my people, that ye be not partakers of her sins, and that ye receive not of her plagues.

5 For her sins have reached unto heaven, and God hath remembered her iniquities.

6 Reward her even as she rewarded you, and double unto her double according to her works: in the cup which she hath filled fill to her double.

7 How much she hath glorified herself, and lived deliciously, so much torment and sorrow give her: for she saith in her heart, I sit a queen, and am no widow, and shall see no sorrow.

8 Therefore shall her plagues come in one day, death, and mourning, and famine; and she shall be utterly burned with fire: for strong is the Lord God who judgeth her.
I was referring to how this affected you personally. The verse above does not mention once about an individual becoming drunk of the wine of the wrath of her fornicaltion. It is referring to nations.
 
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#53
I was referring to how this affected you personally. The verse above does not mention once about an individual becoming drunk of the wine of the wrath of her fornicaltion. It is referring to nations.
Revelation 14

1 And I looked, and, lo, a Lamb stood on the mount Sion, and with him an hundred forty and four thousand, having his Father's name written in their foreheads.

2 And I heard a voice from heaven, as the voice of many waters, and as the voice of a great thunder: and I heard the voice of harpers harping with their harps:

3 And they sung as it were a new song before the throne, and before the four beasts, and the elders: and no man could learn that song but the hundred and forty and four thousand, which were redeemed from the earth.

4 These are they which were not defiled with women; for they are virgins. These are they which follow the Lamb whithersoever he goeth. These were redeemed from among men, being the firstfruits unto God and to the Lamb.

5 And in their mouth was found no guile: for they are without fault before the throne of God.

6 And I saw another angel fly in the midst of heaven, having the everlasting gospel to preach unto them that dwell on the earth, and to every nation, and kindred, and tongue, and people,

7 Saying with a loud voice, Fear God, and give glory to him; for the hour of his judgment is come: and worship him that made heaven, and earth, and the sea, and the fountains of waters.

8 And there followed another angel, saying, Babylon is fallen, is fallen, that great city, because she made all nations drink of the wine of the wrath of her fornication.

9 And the third angel followed them, saying with a loud voice, If any man worship the beast and his image, and receive his mark in his forehead, or in his hand,

10 The same shall drink of the wine of the wrath of God, which is poured out without mixture into the cup of his indignation; and he shall be tormented with fire and brimstone in the presence of the holy angels, and in the presence of the Lamb:

11 And the smoke of their torment ascendeth up for ever and ever: and they have no rest day nor night, who worship the beast and his image, and whosoever receiveth the mark of his name.

12 Here is the patience of the saints: here are they that keep the commandments of God, and the faith of Jesus.

13 And I heard a voice from heaven saying unto me, Write, Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord from henceforth: Yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their labours; and their works do follow them.

14 And I looked, and behold a white cloud, and upon the cloud one sat like unto the Son of man, having on his head a golden crown, and in his hand a sharp sickle.

15 And another angel came out of the temple, crying with a loud voice to him that sat on the cloud, Thrust in thy sickle, and reap: for the time is come for thee to reap; for the harvest of the earth is ripe.

16 And he that sat on the cloud thrust in his sickle on the earth; and the earth was reaped.

17 And another angel came out of the temple which is in heaven, he also having a sharp sickle.

18 And another angel came out from the altar, which had power over fire; and cried with a loud cry to him that had the sharp sickle, saying, Thrust in thy sharp sickle, and gather the clusters of the vine of the earth; for her grapes are fully ripe.

19 And the angel thrust in his sickle into the earth, and gathered the vine of the earth, and cast it into the great winepress of the wrath of God.

20 And the winepress was trodden without the city, and blood came out of the winepress, even unto the horse bridles, by the space of a thousand and six hundred furlongs.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#54
Revelation 14

1 And I looked, and, lo, a Lamb stood on the mount Sion, and with him an hundred forty and four thousand, having his Father's name written in their foreheads.

2 And I heard a voice from heaven, as the voice of many waters, and as the voice of a great thunder: and I heard the voice of harpers harping with their harps:

3 And they sung as it were a new song before the throne, and before the four beasts, and the elders: and no man could learn that song but the hundred and forty and four thousand, which were redeemed from the earth.

4 These are they which were not defiled with women; for they are virgins. These are they which follow the Lamb whithersoever he goeth. These were redeemed from among men, being the firstfruits unto God and to the Lamb.

5 And in their mouth was found no guile: for they are without fault before the throne of God.

6 And I saw another angel fly in the midst of heaven, having the everlasting gospel to preach unto them that dwell on the earth, and to every nation, and kindred, and tongue, and people,

7 Saying with a loud voice, Fear God, and give glory to him; for the hour of his judgment is come: and worship him that made heaven, and earth, and the sea, and the fountains of waters.

8 And there followed another angel, saying, Babylon is fallen, is fallen, that great city, because she made all nations drink of the wine of the wrath of her fornication.

9 And the third angel followed them, saying with a loud voice, If any man worship the beast and his image, and receive his mark in his forehead, or in his hand,

10 The same shall drink of the wine of the wrath of God, which is poured out without mixture into the cup of his indignation; and he shall be tormented with fire and brimstone in the presence of the holy angels, and in the presence of the Lamb:

11 And the smoke of their torment ascendeth up for ever and ever: and they have no rest day nor night, who worship the beast and his image, and whosoever receiveth the mark of his name.

12 Here is the patience of the saints: here are they that keep the commandments of God, and the faith of Jesus.

13 And I heard a voice from heaven saying unto me, Write, Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord from henceforth: Yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their labours; and their works do follow them.

14 And I looked, and behold a white cloud, and upon the cloud one sat like unto the Son of man, having on his head a golden crown, and in his hand a sharp sickle.

15 And another angel came out of the temple, crying with a loud voice to him that sat on the cloud, Thrust in thy sickle, and reap: for the time is come for thee to reap; for the harvest of the earth is ripe.

16 And he that sat on the cloud thrust in his sickle on the earth; and the earth was reaped.

17 And another angel came out of the temple which is in heaven, he also having a sharp sickle.

18 And another angel came out from the altar, which had power over fire; and cried with a loud cry to him that had the sharp sickle, saying, Thrust in thy sharp sickle, and gather the clusters of the vine of the earth; for her grapes are fully ripe.

19 And the angel thrust in his sickle into the earth, and gathered the vine of the earth, and cast it into the great winepress of the wrath of God.

20 And the winepress was trodden without the city, and blood came out of the winepress, even unto the horse bridles, by the space of a thousand and six hundred furlongs.
If you don't want to talk about how it affected you then that's OK. You mind as well post the whole book of Revelation if that makes you feel better about yourself.
 
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#55
If you don't want to talk about how it affected you then that's OK. You mind as well post the whole book of Revelation if that makes you feel better about yourself.
Two kingdoms and two cups. Babylon's kingdom of her children that drank from her cup, and God's kingdom that is charged to serve Babylon the cup of his wine of wrath. Everyone will get what they deserve for their own deeds, for strong and just is the Lord our God.
 

tourist

Senior Member
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#56
Two kingdoms and two cups. Babylon's kingdom of her children that drank from her cup, and God's kingdom that is charged to serve Babylon the cup of his wine of wrath. Everyone will get what they deserve for their own deeds, for strong and just is the Lord our God.
Just explained clearly how these verses you provided affected you in a practical way, otherwise you are just posting gibberish.
 
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#57
Just explained clearly how these verses you provided affected you in a practical way, otherwise you are just posting gibberish.
Well you wanted to know what I was referring to so I thought you wanted the verses. Everyone is affected, you're either in God's kingdom or Babylon's kingdom. If you're in Babylon's kingdom you drank from her cup, which is full of fornications and abominations. The drinkers of Babylon's cup will certainly drink the cup of the wine of wrath. Those that did not drink Babylon's cup, but whom the wicked whores, the children of Babylon vexed constantly, they will not drink the wine of wrath, they will serve it to the wicked to make them drunk and stumble and be slain, in the name of Jesus, amen.
 

tourist

Senior Member
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#58
Well you wanted to know what I was referring to so I thought you wanted the verses. Everyone is affected, you're either in God's kingdom or Babylon's kingdom. If you're in Babylon's kingdom you drank from her cup, which is full of fornications and abominations. The drinkers of Babylon's cup will certainly drink the cup of the wine of wrath. Those that did not drink Babylon's cup, but whom the wicked whores, the children of Babylon vexed constantly, they will not drink the wine of wrath, they will serve it to the wicked to make them drunk and stumble and be slain, in the name of Jesus, amen.
What have you done or not done that makes you believe that you yourself has not drunk from this cup?
 
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#59
What have you done or not done that makes you believe that you yourself has not drunk from this cup?
Babylon's children are those that drank from her cup. The contents of her golden cup are fornications and abominations. This is one of very many ways to tell if someone is on Babylon's side. Those on Jesus' side are the virgins and those that have only had their one mate and stayed with that person in love and loyalty and truth, which is the correct way of God. Much can be said for the many wrong ways of Babylon and her children the sluts, but this should be sufficient.
 

tourist

Senior Member
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#60
Babylon's children are those that drank from her cup. The contents of her golden cup are fornications and abominations. This is one of very many ways to tell if someone is on Babylon's side. Those on Jesus' side are the virgins and those that have only had their one mate and stayed with that person in love and loyalty and truth, which is the correct way of God. Much can be said for the many wrong ways of Babylon and her children the sluts, but this should be sufficient.
So, if one is not a virgin and had more than one mate that person drank from the cup? You mentioned fornication. Didn't Jesus die on the cross for such sins for those that have contritely confessed them? Were we not all children of Babylon at one time or another?