"Tough love" is an expression of a disciplinary action, with the intent on helping someone in the long run. Raising children in the biblical sense of "tough love", the chastening hand is always controlled by a loving heart. The book of Proverbs and Hebrews speaks a lot on discipline and love. We must recognize that this kind of disciplinary action is sometimes necessary when we consider the magnitude of the spiritual battles we fight everyday. Satan makes every attempt to knock us off our spiritual path with Jesus. A strong dose of "tough love" may be the most appropriate course of action when children or anyone strays from the path of righteousness.
Proverbs 13:24 "He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him promptly." Spanking your child is part of parenting, and when we discipline, we do it "promptly" or carefully.
Hebrews 12:11 This verse tells us that discipline is not pleasant at the time it is received, its "grievous", but later on it produces righteousness and obedience to the one that has been trained by it.
Hebrews 12:5-6 God disciplines those He loves.
God loves us and yet punishes us when we are not being obedient. He punishes everyone He accepts as His children so therefore how can parents not discipline their children in the same way God does us? Firm discipline is as unpleasant to the parent as it is for the child, so "tough love" along with other forms of discipline must be practiced by the parent to keep kids from straying away from God's word.
A lot of children are unruly because of a lack of discipline, and that is because the parents are relaxed in morals, so they let their children get away with more, and many frown upon using physical discipline.
The counter culture movement caused a relaxed attitude in morals, and then the morals slip more as time goes on so they deal with children being less strict as time goes on for the attitude started.
Pro 30:11 There is a generation that curseth their father, and doth not bless their mother.
12 There is a generation that are pure in their own eyes, and yet is not washed from their filthiness.
13 There is a generation, O how lofty are their eyes! and their eyelids are lifted up.
14 There is a generation, whose teeth are as swords, and their jaw teeth as knives, to devour the poor from off the earth, and the needy from among men.
The last generation before Jesus comes back the children will not obey their parents like previous generations.
The Bible says parents do not provoke your children to wrath, so the children do not want to obey because of the lack of morals of the parents, so the children think you do not do right but you try to tell me to do right as many parents are short with their children, drinking alcohol, and driving, and drugs, and cigarettes, and stealing, and breaking the law, and cutting down the neighbors, and swearing, and the parents do not discipline because of their lack of morals.
Eph 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise).
Pro 23:13 Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish them with the rod, they will not die.
14 Punish them with the rod and save them from death.
Children obeying the parents is the first commandment with promise for if they humble themselves towards their parents then they are more likely to humble themselves before authority, and God.
But the counter culture movement was about rebelling against authority, and the age decreased as time went on.
While some people say the children do not act like they used to act I say it is more the parents fault.
I have a 5 year old great nephew who swears a lot, and even prides himself in swearing, and he was swearing at 3 years old, and he swears a lot, and if his mom calls him he will say what does that B want, and whines and cries a lot to have his way, really selfish, and mean calling people names, and swearing at everybody including his parents, and fights with people, for that is all he has learned, and knows, and that is reality to them, and it is because of how his parents act, and their lack of discipline, and does not listen because his parents fight with each other, and are aggressive, and swear.
But my great nephew might not be functioning properly mentally because his parents did drugs, and his mom did drugs when she was pregnant, but he seems to be functioning properly enough to learn discipline if he got enough of it.
God said physically discipline a child, for they will not die, and you will drive hell from them.
But it is a rod for a fool's back not spanking your child for everything they do wrong, for they will do wrong as all people do wrong.
A fool is someone who will not listen no matter how much you talk to them for they are in defiance of the parents, so the only way to correct them is with physical discipline.
I think it is ridiculous for parents not to act right, and then want to discipline their children to act right, for they take drugs, and drink alcohol, and are short with the children, and swear, and break the law, and dog people out, and this is almost the norm among many young parents, and then want to discipline their children.
Parents provoke your children not to wrath, but many parents want to say children do not act like they used to act, and it is because many parents do not act like they used to act.
This is not Little House on the Prairie anymore among the majority of the people for God told us of the last generation and their attitude, as well as many hypocritical Christians, and they are telling their children to obey them.