Hello there!
A recent conversation with some fellow Christian singles had me thinking - where does the popular saying, "God is out there preparing the right person for you!" come from, anyway? To my knowledge (and please feel free to correct me), there is absolutely no Biblical basis for telling someone this, and yet, I almost always hear it come up when others are trying to give singles "hope." How did people come up with this conclusion and decide it's what singles should be told? God bless anyone for trying to minister to a single, but I know I've never found this "advice" to be of any comfort, because God just as well might NOT be preparing someone for me either. After all, God's plans are not our plans.
As a parallel to this dilemma, I've been reading that due to various factors, infertility rates are on the rise and many couples are struggling when trying to start or expand their families.
Can you imagine telling someone who is struggling to have a baby, "Don't worry, God is up there drawing up the blueprints for the perfect little boy or girl, just for you! After all, He knows each of us before we are even formed in the womb!" (Jeremiah 1:5.) At least, I sure am hoping there is no one out there telling anyone this, and to anyone who's been told this, I sincerely apologize.
If Chrisitians (hopefully) don't say these kinds of things to someone trying to have a baby, why do they so readily say such things to those trying to find a husband or wife?
I attended a church group this past week in which the pastor's wife said they had never had a ministry for singles because they figured singles could join in on everything (except the small groups specifically designed for married couples), but when she had read an article stating that "if the church ignores singles, they are missing half the harvest," God convicted her. Indeed. A good percentage of my co-workers have always been single parents. What would the church do if they suddenly had in increase of members, and 50% of them were single?
Personally, I think God is raising people up, especially singles like us, to be able to help show other singles who are brought into the church how it's done. (And in a way this scares me, because I often still don't have a clue.)
But how can we even help them if all we've been given are overused cliches that don't even have a Biblical truth to back them?
Here are some questions I'm hoping people will voice their thoughts on:
* Why do people try to tell singles that God is preparing someone just for them, when that might not actually be true? (God bless them for trying, but it just doesn't quite hit the mark.)
* What should we be telling singles (including ourselves) instead? (Or, if you do believe in telling people that God is preparing someone for them, feel free to state why -- this isn't an all-or-nothing discussion -- all perspectives are welcome.) Just because this particular saying has never helped me doesn't mean it hasn't helped someone else, so I'd be very interested in hearing about that.
* Have you been told that God is preparing someone for you? Did you wind up meeting that person, and how did it go? Are you still waiting? How do you feel about being told this after having to wait a considerably long time? Do you still believe it will happen?
Thanks very much for taking the time to read, ponder, and reply.
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