Losing the will to live

In dire need of prayer. Losing hope everyday, I've been feeling like I have no purpose and I'm not important to anyone. Nothing good seems to happen for me. I am feeling more and more like I was created by God to suffer and then die. Suicide feels like the only way out some days.

GEMMY! Buck up gal,this is nonsense. You are created wonderfully and fearfully! Start reading Psalms,sing songs,walking. Life is not over bc of the rat you were with. God gives us beauty for ashes ,the oil of joy for mourning all by Him! Is.61:1-3!
NOW SNAP OUT OF THIS! You are stronger,smarter etc all things through Him. I love you!

Ps,I am holding you,precious Gemmy and your little one up before Him,always!

I’m praying for you. I understand what you are going through. Please know that you are not embracing truth right now; sometimes depression can cause you to think things that aren’t true. God did not create your to suffer then die. If you are a Believer, you are a light and have purpose. You are to live for Him! You are not your own, you are bought at a price.

Can I challenge you to do something? Please write down the main thoughts that are disturbing you and find Bible verses to combat those things. Then write things that God has done for you, ways He has provided, things you are GRATEFUL and thankful for. Gemmy, this combats a spirit of discouragement. I have been struggling with the same exact things, so I’m saying this as a friend who understands.

You will get through this season. You will once again have the joy of the Lord even in the midst of pain! There is hope and it is in the Lord. He is for you, NOT against you! He came that you might have ABUNDANT life through His Spirit. Look to THAT life. Do not believe the lies that this material world has your abundance. Where the Spirit is there is life, so I’m praying God’s Spirit overwhelms you with love and kindness. Please pray that for me also. Love in Christ, A.

Oh dear sweet precious Gemmy. Is there anything we can say to help you? Will you please reach out to someone near you, let them know you are hurting? I understand feeling super sad and low. I think most can. Please know you are so valuable. You are a treasure. Let us call out to the Lord together.

Please do not give up. You are so loved.

Emmy, watch this sermon from Levi Lusko at Fresh Life Church. Towards the end, particularly, it is exactly what you are experiencing! Very encouraging; I just heard it and thought of you.
https://subspla.sh/5fbcg4n

And keep us updated, let us know how you are doing, please.

If you want or need to talk, reach out please. I am praying for you and would be honored to sit with you awhile. Love you.

Just hope this is not the only place you are being open about your feelings. Ive felt suicidal sometimes if that is any compensation for you. Don't be ashamed of being in that dark place now. Just know that there is light. There is a way out. Im hoping you are praying too.

1 Peter 5:8 ASV
Be sober, be watchful: your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:

Dearest Gemmy... you must ask yourself why you are so attached to a man who belittles you, who abuses you, who damages you, your child, and your property, and takes little to no responsibility for his actions while taking you and his child for granted, walking in and out of your lives as he pleases. Where did you get the idea that this was love? Do you expect him to change while he isolates you, and robs you of your independence and selfhood? You are losing yourself by accommodating him to the point that you are becoming withdrawn, depressed, and suicidal. Your child needs you. Your opinions and feelings do matter even if it sometimes feels easier to keep the peace by trying to avoid conflict while you live in fear of his threats, his insults, his temperament, and his reprehensible behavior. However, you cannot keep negating yourself to meet his needs while he ignores yours. When you learn to build healthier boundaries you will not only feel better about yourself, but will be better equipped to care for your child as well as being better able to have a more mutually satisfying relationship. I pray you take steps to care for yourself, and learn to value yourself, for you deserve to be treated with kindness and respect. Jesus died for you so that you would know you are loved.

Thank you for your prayers. I feel more stupid than anything right now. I got so mad I broke my phone like an idiot so now there is another expense on top of all the other things I have to fix. Today was horrible, this whole weekend was.

I honestly don't know why I keep letting him treat me so crappy. I want to help him and be there for him but it seems I'm hurting myself more and more. I also try to be a good support because he also talks of self harm when things aren't going well. I just feel somewhat lost and still feel a bit enraged. I just want to live happily and be able to care for my daughter and do more for her but I have more bills and problems it seems at the moment. I keep everything in because I don't have many people I can go to to talk about what I'm feeling.

Gemmy,there comes a point where you just have to let go and let God do,be ,say ect. His sins are his own,but he does know how to " MANIPULATE" you! Turn him over to the Lord and walk away,otherwise your turmoil will increase and continue!

The pain of abuse and the regret you will have for not walking away from the ongoing abuse is a mighty big monster. Leaving an abuser is the nicest thing you can do for him. He is broken, and that is why he is breaking you. You are hurting all of you if you stay. Never tell yourself you deserve this, never.

I am so sorry for you and your daughter...I get it and my heart breaks for you. I want so bad to fix this for you. You are precious. I know what this can do to your mind.

Please seek help nearby, there are those want to be there for you. I know it is scary not knowing what is next but you can do this, for her, for yourself and even for him. He needs help that you can not give. It won't be easy and it will take time to heal. It is time to start that healing, for you and your daughter.

I was with an mental and physical abuser for 7 years and leaving that life helped him to get the help he needed.

For her and for you, I pray you choose to walk away.

Hugging you from a far and again I am glad you are reaching out. I will keep praying and don't hesitate to keep us posted, good or bad.

Your life can and will be better sweetheart. Love you.

We're just here, gemmy, lifting you up in prayer. God IS faithful, you know. Taste and see that He is so good too!

Lord bless Gemmy and this prayer request. In Jesus name, Amen!

Sometimes I find the Lord works more at the end of ourselves...I'm sure you've probably heard so many motivational things from pastors but occasionally we just need to blindly stab in a direction and see what fruit appears. His arm is not weak. I know it's dark out there... I don't ever feel really alive unless I'm helping other people. It's like a "working aliveness" something like a job and it's not the fairy tale eternal rest/life I think we stand to inherit but it's certainly preferable to the dangerous funk of drowning in a sea of hopelessness.

I'm scared of dying outside his will...I think it would make him sad. Sometimes I get a bit mad at him but you know what? He can take that. He can take what I have to dish out. I've thrown some curveballs that have surprised even me. I don't think they were the enemy or the lord...just me. Kind of shows me I do have a choice to not drown but I have to take his hand. It's hard and sometimes we have to reach in scary storms but he is our rock and our fortress. Our strong tower. Our very present help in time of need


Look up some lighthouse pictures. That's the picture I had in mind when reading your post. Strong tower. A rock that is higher than ourselves.

Not Important!!?

YOU, are so incredibly important, that God became flesh, in the form of His Son, to die for YOU!

THAT, sounds like something pretty good has happened for you.

What is the hope you are losing? It is very difficult to feel bad while helping others. First, it gets our minds off of US, and onto other hurting people. Then it shows us that we are needed. Maybe just for that one person we touched, to show that they are loved and valued.

Holy Father, help Your daughter recognize just how valuable to You she is. Give her a renewed hope in the knowledge of who she is in You. Show her the purpose You have for her and to live with the joy of being in Your Son. In Jesus Name.

Dear Gemmy, I hear you but I hear some untrue thoughts you expressed in your opening statement. You say you have no purpose, so who is responsible for your child...you, of course. A child is a gift and a beautiful bond God creates for us. They need someone who cares to guide them and love them.
Don't you think you're important to your child, you sure are, so you can't say you're not important to anyone.
Something good happened to you, your salvation/Jesus, child, prayer partners here and so on.
Never ever could I think God, who sent Jesus to suffer for us, would want a precious mother with a child to suffer or think He wants you to.
From what I recall, it's your choice to remain with an unstable partner. He is not your burden to fix, only God through prayers and the person's attitude can help. As long as your with him you are putting yourself in an unproductive disappointing spot.
Remember, God tells us to 'bring ALL thoughts into captivity' and 'pull down strongholds'. As long as. you let yourself be abused it will be hard to think right.
I'm praying the Holy Spirit, our Helper/Comforter, will touch your heart and bless you with his love and truth and deliverance. We are believers in God and know He honors His word. 'My thoughts are for you and not against you, says the Lord; thoughts of peace and not evil, to give you a future and a HOPE' Jer 29:11.
Trust Him He is still the God of miracles, love and restoration. God bless.