I’m a mess right now

I’m a total mess right now. I believe I was saved 13 years ago, after I started attending church. I asked God to come into my heart and forgive my sins, I believed in Jesus and his sacrifice. I was 17 so I don’t remember exactly what I said. The past few years I feel like I’ve strayed from God, indulging in gossip most of all which is not becoming of a Christian believer. Recently I have been having some health problems and I have been terrified researching that I have committed the “unpardonable sin” because of this gossiping and waiting until now to repent of it. I’m questioning if I was ever saved at this point. I’m afraid my heart has become hardened and I am doomed. Any insight would be greatly appreciated .

Relax brother. If gossiping is the biggest sin you got on your record, YOU DOING GOOD HOMIE

Here is how you know you haven't commited the unpardonable sin: You are worried that you did. Had you commited it, you would not CARE at all about anything spiritual.

Im GLAD to hear you DID repent of it, better late than never. God is happy everytime a sinner repents, remember that.

The fact that you are so shaken by gossiping is also evidence that you do NOT have a hardened heart at all! You wouldn't know of God convicting you of gossiping if you had a hardened heart, REMEMBER THAT!

Take a deep breath, praise God for saving you.

Sounds more like the devil is attacking your mind to me. I don`t usually think or talk about this sin because it frightens me. I rebel in my mind sometimes and have stumbled plenty of times.

This unpardenable sin involves speaking against, mocking, insulting, or denying the existence of the Holy Spirit. I don`t think I`ve ever heard anybody do that even among the worldly. Some things said against Christians who believe in the gifts might come close, But hopefully, God is mercifull. I think you are ok. It`s good to confess, let God have His way and let your guilt go.

WoW! I wish my only problem was being guilty of some gossip Trust Jesus More.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

I guess I should clarify “gossip” meaning sometimes I’m the starter of the gossip. Talking about things that I probably shouldn’t. Sometimes about my own family members ☹️ From what I’ve read God looks at that with extreme me displeasure: wrath it says. I am really terrified that if I died I would not go to heaven.

Also I’ve done it many times without thinking and it takes me a while to ask for forgiveness. This is what I’m walking about a “hardened heart”. I’m really in despair.

I wasn`t minimizing your sin. Gossip can be very damaging to other people.

It is evident that you are in repentence. Repent all you want. But you have to trust Jesus, doubting your salvation is a breakdown of this trust. God doesn`t go around looking for children to throw into hell anymore then you would slay your kid for misbehaving.

I say this as someone who has struggled with guilt. Let the Holy Spirit do His cleansing work and trust in Jesus for your salvation.
You want to do something? Well then just forsake gossiping and don`t do it anymore. Make restitution to any you have harmed by it if you can.

Sometimes repentence lasts awhile, turn it over to God. Let His Spirit take you through it and it will pass.

6 Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:

7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

(1 Peter 5)

This passage even applies to sin because Jesus took your sin upon Himself. He is the Propiation that saves you from your sin.

John 10:9, “I (Jesus) am the door. Whoever enters through Me, he shall be saved, and shall go in and shall go out and find pasture.”

Did you research what the unpardonable sin is?

If so I'd be interested to know what research led the conclusion that gossip is the unpardonable sin.

Gossiping isn't good, but definitely not the unpardonable sin. That's blasphemy of the Holy Ghost.

I kind of know how you feel, though.

I got saved about 20 years ago, at the age of 20. I had a hard time with gossiping at that time. I felt awful every time I did, and kept praying about it. I seemed to do it without even thinking at times. Just couldn't catch or stop myself from doing it.

Like I said, I kept praying about it and one day a group of friends where gossiping. Without even thinking, I started speaking, but couldn't even get out the first word...I was stuttering so bad ( and I don't have a speech impediment)... All I got out was, shhhhhhhheeeeeeeee...lol Enough to realize what I was doing and stop. I told the others, God stopped me cause it wasn't any of my business...lol

I thanked the Lord for that, and now I have no urges to gossip anymore. I usually just walk away when someone is gossiping now, and even if they are gossiping I'm not even paying attention so I couldn't repeat stuff they said even if I wanted to.

Just keep praying God understands and can help you. This is definitely not the unpardonable sin, though.

I will pray for your plight in the blessing that you find peace concerning all of this that troubles you now.

You may know that you are in Christ, saved, by considering the affirmation within these scriptures.
"We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers. Anyone who does not love remains in death." The Book of 1st John chapter 3 verse 14

"Anyone who believes in the Son of God has this testimony in their heart. Anyone who does not believe God has made them out to be a liar, because they have not believed the testimony God has given about His Son." The Book of 1st John chapter 5 verse 10

Be of good cheer and take heart. God LOVES YOU!

What unpardonable sin?

You asked God to come into your heart and forgive your sins and belived in Jesus and his sacrifice.

So you do remember what you said.

Thanks for he response! I guess where I’m feeling upset is that at times it’s been of my own family members out of anger or spite 😖 which is not loving your neighbor as you do yourself. The second greatest commandment.

The unpardonable sin is rejecting Jesus? Or saying that he is of the devil?

I always heard it was blasphemy against the Holy Ghost. It always scared me too. I know I'd never done anything like that, but the enemy would try to get me to believe that I did.

I was tortured by the devil with it for about a year.

But anyhow here's the verse where it talks about it:

Matthew 12:31-32 King James Version (KJV)
31 Wherefore I say unto you, All manner of sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven unto men: but the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men.

32 And whosoever speaketh a word against the Son of man, it shall be forgiven him: but whosoever speaketh against the Holy Ghost, it shall not be forgiven him, neither in this world, neither in the world to come.

Hi. I just read this. Maybe it will help you. (https://www.ligonier.org/blog/what-unpardonable-sin/ )

Christians and The Unpardonable Sin
Humanly speaking, everyone who is a Christian is capable of committing the unforgivable sin. However, I believe that the Lord of glory who has saved us and sealed us in the Holy Spirit will never let us commit that sin. I do not believe that any Christians in the history of the church have blasphemed the Spirit.
As for those who are not sure they are saved and are worried they may have committed the unpardonable sin, I would say that worrying about it is one of the clearest evidences that they have not committed this sin, for those who commit it are so hardened in their hearts they do not care that they commit it. Thanks be to God that the sin that is unpardonable is not a sin He allows His people to commit.

I pray for God's peace to be upon you. I believe that once we already ask for forgiveness to God and not doing the sin over and over again, shows that we really repent on that sin, we don't have to worry or think maybe we are still not forgiven. God knows our hearts, we can't hide anything from Him. So I pray for God's peace to be with you and listen more to His Word for your assurance and comfort. God bless!

I believed I had committed the unpardonable sin at one time. Worst feeling ever--I felt like I was falling into a black hole, and I took my feelings as a confirmation that God had let me go and abandoned me forever. I thought I had rejected Him one time too many, and that my heart had become too hardened to be healed.

But over time, after a lot of struggles and prayer and study and people encouraging me, I realized that my feelings weren't what I should rely on. I realized I need to believe Jesus' words when He says, "He who comes to me I will in no wise cast out." John 6:37.

I realized that my fears and worries about the unpardonable sin were evidence that God was still working on my heart, and that He was calling me back to Him. God doesn't care how sinful you are, or how low you've sunk; if you're willing to come, He's willing to forgive and heal you. Read the parable of the father and prodigal son in Luke 15. Picture the father running to greet his son and put a robe on him. That's what God wants to do for anyone and everyone, "whosoever will" (Rev. 22:17), if they're willing. Remember that God is FOR you, not against you.

"If God be for us, who can be against us? He that spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?" (Rom. 8:31-32).

And if you're worried you haven't repented properly, remember that even repentance is a gift from God. (Acts. 5:31, 2 Tim. 2:25). It is the goodness of God that leads us to repentance. (Rom. 2:4). Satan likes to discourage us and think our cases are too hopeless for God to work with, but God is willing to work with anyone, even Paul who persecuted the Christians, and King Manasseh who did multiple horrible things (2 Chron. 33). They were both saved because they responded to God's call to repentance, and trusted in God's mercy. Jesus can heal the hardest heart, if that person is willing to let His light melt them (John 3: 21, 1 John 1:7).

Don't listen to Satan's lies that you can never be forgiven. In 1 John it says, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (verse 9). Jesus has the power to cleanse us from all unrighteousness if we're willing to turn away from evil and accept His righteousness. Believe it. Even if you don't feel forgiven, believe God's words, because He can't lie. He'll heal your backslidings and love you freely (Hosea 14:4). He'll take your heart of stone away and give you a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 11:19). He'll create in you a new heart, and renew a right spirit within you (Psalm 51:10).

I know, because He did it for me. <3

Here's some advice. Do research on what the unpardonable sin actually is. Because so many come here and say "I think I have committed the unpardonable sin", yet they have no clue what it is..