Hey Pippy, great thread!
I know this might sound strange and a bit controversial, but I have never liked being Asian.
Now, I think being Asian is a wonderful thing--for other Asians. But for myself, being adopted by white parents (which confuses the bazooka out of people) in a small, all-white, narrow-minded town always made me wish, you guessed it, that I was white. If I had to live among white people, why couldn't I at least look like them?
I was fine inside my own family--but being around everyone else made me feel like God had made me "wrong". One of my best friends is African American and always says I'm "the whitest white girl" he has ever known.
Is is possible to have a racial identity crisis? I guess that's what I have. I get tired of having kids (sometimes even to this day) "slant" their eyes at me and so forth. I get tired of older white people asking me if my name is Mei Ling or if I speak English, etc. (and I know my examples are nothing compared to what most other people go through, so I'm definitely not trying to sound like, "Oh, poor me," but rather, just to voice a few frustrations.)
I was talking with my nephews the other day about whether kids make fun of them and how they react. I was hoping they wouldn't encounter such things, being in a more diverse area, but, alas--people are people wherever you go. My Mom was telling them about the time a little girl in church kept turning around and looking at me... and then finally "slanted" her eyes at me--and my Mom gave her a look like she was going to hope over the pew and choke her. Lol... Good times.
I have always felt like God made me a white girl on the inside but for some reason, put me into the "wrong" shell. I know this is just my own warped thinking, and also a sin of discontentment. Interestingly, I don't think my black friend has ever wanted to be white and I don't think my white friends who grew up in all-black areas ever wanted to be black, so maybe it's just me.
The one thing I'm grateful for is that I think it helps me understand those who say they are gay or transgender, etc. I know it's not a sin to be any certain race, but I can relate to the part about wanting to be something God didn't make us to be. I pray for them, and that their hearts will be content with the way God has made them, just as I have to make that prayer for myself.
I realize it's just plain sin, and the only answer is to repent and thank God for His wisdom in making us who we are.
Maybe I'm just taking a little longer to get there than most others.