Home Sweet Home: Thoughts on Renting Vs. Owning, and a House Vs. an Apartment?

Hey Everyone,

I'd like to open up a discussion about the topic of being single and overcoming some of the unique challenges we face when it comes to affordable housing. For instance, no matter what we choose, we singles will typically have only one income going towards the payments, as well as having to take on the responsibility of any and all maintenance.

I was raised with the belief that if possible, the goal should always be to work towards a house (something that builds equity), rather than renting.

However, as I get to be a little older, I'm wondering if that belief still holds true. I have an acquaintance who is a little older than me and just bought her first home. She's worked very hard to avoid having any kind of debt, so the reality of a mortgage has been weighing heavily on her mind.

"What have I done?" she lamented, "A bank now owns me until I'm well into my 70's... What am I going to do? Will I be able to keep working at the pace I'm going at now in order to be able to keep up for that long? I should have just stuck with renting." And that really got me thinking about all the things I had been taught about renting vs. owning, especially with things like student loans further pushing the reality of home ownership further out of reach.

* What are your thoughts/experiences with renting vs. owning your living space? What do you feel is best for your situation and needs, and why?

* Are you renting, but do you hope to buy a house? Do you own a home, but wish you were still renting? Why or why not?

* Do you prefer an apartment or a house (whether renting or owning), and why?

* Does age matter when it comes to renting vs. owning? (Is there a certain age where you should "give up" the idea of owning a home, and why?)

Everyone is welcome to post, whether you're single, married, or maybe just contemplating what you plan to do when you get out on your own.

I would really be interested in hearing your thoughts, so thank you in advance for sharing.

The bank doesn't own her til she's 70 lol. She can sell at anytime and keep the equity (assuming there's equity - but there usually is some unless someone's upside down on their mortgage). It would be like she rented the home for free and got paid (equity) at the end.... (minus any repairs, maintenance, property taxes, etc..) You can't do that if you're renting. When you rent, you get nothing back when you move... except maybe your security deposit.

I have owned several trailers but never an actual home until I married my current (and last) wife. The main reason for this is I did not want to be tied down to a specific geographic area and wanted the freedom to move without the hassle of selling a home. Another thing, not all homes accrue equity, some lose value. If you factor in insurance, property taxes, upkeep, and major repairs you might not realize any profit when you sell. You could conceivably lose a lot of money.

My wife has always purchased homes rather than renting and our townhome that we now jointly owned has considerable equity as there is a high demand for housing in the area that we reside. We plan on selling within 2 years and move to Tennessee. The plan is to rent for the first year or so to see if we actually enjoy living there and could continue to live there at an affordable cost if we chose to purchase another home. Of course, at our ages there is no way that the mortgage would eventually be paid. I suppose if both parties die the bank could simply take possession unless other financial arrangements have been made.

I have rented many times and found there is less anxiety about that as it is really only a temporary arrangement unlike owning a home which is more or less permanent. Another thing, if you do purchase a home you better have good neighbors because if you have neighbors from hell you are in for the hassle of your life. I had neighbors from hell once when I owned a mobile home. I lived there for 5 years and eventually sold it for more than I paid for it. Once the neighbor situation became intolerable I put it up for sale and sold it within a week.

Age would be a consideration at some point about whether or not to buy a home but both my wife and I are 64 and will probably eventually be buying yet another home. Personally, at this point I don't care one way or another but my wife prefers to own and in this regards I am just along for the ride. I believe that home is where the heart is but that is probably not related to the topic at hand.

Thanks for sharing sis

I’d like to say that my parents have always encouraged me to save up and buy a house which I’m currently doing. I’ve seen the struggle with renting a house cause I have a relative who is renting with her family and they are pretty much paying mortage rate! It’s crazy. I guess it works for some and not others. I do have a pretty good amount set up to invest, but of course, I’d have to consider the fact if I was in a relationship with someone, whether he had savings or not. All of that comes to account. I would however definitely want my own home, just because if or when I have babies, I want them to have the home etc.

I don’t think age matters either. I read an article where a guy saved up and at the age of 19 brought his first home. Whereas I know another couple brought their first home in their late 30s.

Also, the market rates and different countries would need to be taken into consideration. I’m not sure how the market value is in America but here it’s pretty good at the moment

My wife bought her first home at the age of 18. There are pros and cons but generally owning your own home probably provides the better housing value for your dollar. The market in America depends on several factors, mainly geographical location, standard of living, schools, crime, and the current job market. Have you designed a nursery design, color scheme or theme yet where the babies are going to sleep? Each time my daughter had a baby she had a unique design, color and theme. The first baby the theme was "Blues Clues". I think that was a board game or maybe a doll.

Owning is good but only if you can afford it. I rented the cheapest decent apartment I could for the past several years and it's been good for me, but I definitely want things like laundry machines that I don't have to go outside to get to (we're expecting sub zero temperatures the rest of this week, no one wants to trek across the parking lot to do laundry in that) and a garage to keep my car from getting all icy and snow covered (and store the bicycle that's sitting in front of my window). I'm trying to be realistic however and not bite off more house than I can chew (which means I plan to be closer to the Dave Ramsey figure of mortgage payments no more than 25% of my take home income rather than what all the online calculators tell me I can afford because I can get approved for that and be in debt up to my eyeballs).

My rather limited experiences are that renting from a good place / person isn't bad, especially if you need to put your money towards other stuff like getting out of debt and not getting stuck with a big repair / maintenance bill that you can't afford; but renting from a crappy place or person is an exercise in frustration because if something goes wrong, you can't do anything to fix it without permission and just have to wait until the responsible person decides to get around to it. My brother has also had issues (renting houses) where a repair was needed but the landlord then scheduled the appointment for when my bro was supposed to be at work and he had to take off of work to get his stuff fixed. So I guess I see a lot of the advantage of buying as when I'm the owner I can decide if I want to replace, change, or repair something rather than waiting on someone else (who is likely more concerned about the economic advantages or disadvantages rather than quality of life for me) to decide and or get around to doing it. So far I've only rented apartments in managed complexes and they have been fine, though I'm not that difficult to please. My most recent place, I actually read reviews of complexes online and ruled out another cheap one just because no one had anything good to say about it (and when I was talking about it with the manager here and mentioned there was one that just had too many bad reviews she knew exactly which one I was talking about).

I don't think planning to rent forever makes good financial sense, but some of that depends on lifestyle decisions, local market, and just general life stability. If you want to live in the middle of a big city and have no car expenses, the the real estate is probably going to be astronomically priced there and you'll have to rent to be where you want to be. In my area, there really aren't a lot of apartments that I like the rent for so I think I'm going to be better off buying just because I don't want to rent a house from a private person and there aren't a lot of apartments that I like enough to stay renting. You also have to ask yourself, if renting were cheaper than buying, how can all these investors be making money off of rental properties.

As for Kim's friend, if she had stuck with renting, what was her plan to house herself when she was no longer capable of working? Because at least now with some equity in a house (or if she's lucky a whole house paid off) she will have some money and options for housing when that day comes (and her mortgage payment might well be less than the rent she could get anywhere else).

I am renting an apartment now. I previously owned a house. It was my mom’s before. I did exactly what they recommend you not do in Grief Share and bought her house from the estate because I was being emotional and wanted to keep the house in the family.

I am paying more for the apartment than I did for the house. It’s also a bit smaller. There are good and bad parts to that. I’m no longer building equity every month when I make a payment, but I also don’t have to mess with the repairs and the expense of replacing appliances and all that.

That house had sentimental value; but a lot of the expensive appliances needed to be replaced, it needed a new roof, had a small water leak and really needed a sprinkler system installed in the back yard. Plus there was a huge yard that needed a lot of work each week. I am grateful to be in an apartment every time I see the landscaping guys out there.

Lifestyle wise, I am finding I enjoy this apartment a lot. I live on the top floor so Inhave to get more exercise taking the stairs every day and I can no longer be lazy with my dog. If he needs to use the bathroom, he needs a walk. I can’t just kick him out into the back yard for a bit when I am feeling lazy. I also have to eat better so I am up to eating him 3 times a day every day.

There was also a lot of grief I didn’t do living in the old place until I sold it. That’s kind of unique to my situation though.

If i were married or going to be soon, I would probably prefer a house. I may get one again at some point, but as a single guy I kind of prefer where I am at. It inspires me to get out and be healthier. I am also in a good location where I can get to Boise, Eagle and Meridian. Living in a house, I would be a bit more remote and isolated. Which is fine with a family maybe?

Awww That’s cute! I don’t think I’ve thought that far ahead lol and it’s not really a big thing in my culture to design a nursery before baby comes - we tend to wait first until baby is born then start cracking lol also, I would prefer to have babys cot in the same bedroom as us. I grew up really close with my siblings and grew up sleeping in the same bedroom as them until we were in our younger teens. I’d like to keep that close knit feel with my future babies, God willing.

I have friends who enjoy designing their babies nursery and it’s a nice way of spending time with your other half preparing

Thank you all for the interesting and informative replies. One of the things I'm hoping to hear during this discussion is some of the wide and varying considerations across so many different situations, regions, and countries.

I like the point that buying a house makes sense--if you can afford it.

I have some friends who were contemplating buying in an area in which the starting point for houses is around $350,000. Not only would one have to be able to afford the mortgage payments, but also the upkeep (lawn maintenance and landscaping--because the property has to be kept up to par with everyone else's), HOA fees (several thousand dollars in this case), property taxes (another several thousand dollars a year), and other assorted maintenance (regularly power washing the siding, cleaning out the eavestraughs, etc.) And then there's the additional long-term maintenance, such as replacing the heating/cooling units, water heater, roof, etc. as time goes on.

One of the neighbors in the area had a house that was 20 years old and still beautiful, but had spent $30,000 in the past 3 years just on unforeseen repairs.

I know it's impossible to anticipate every cost that will come up over the years, but after hearing some of these numbers thrown around, I had to wonder if one would ever really recuperate what they'd invested into such an expensive property.

I sold my house as is and still made quite a bit more than I had originally bought it for. The housing market is booming like crazy here, though. I think once it was fixed up, my old place was sold for almost double what I had paid. But they put in $20-30k in work on it to get it to that price.

I’m not sure if I could afford a house right now in this area with the way prices are shooting up. There have been a number of new apartment building opening up here so that is helping to keep those prices a little more stable.

In a few years I’m not sure if I would be able to afford one on my own on this area unless I get a better paying job.

Great topic... I do have a little bit of experience here, and have considered how I might even optimize my financial options given my iminent and official status as an empty nester into single-hood...
I've been blessed as a military veteran to take advantage of VA Loans (min to no down payment) with the financial strategy (at 27 years old) to buy a home everytime the Marine Corps relocated me. With the plan to refinance & convert each VA loan to a conventional loan in order to be able to take advantage of the VA Loan in each new location and rent the previously bought property to allow the rent money to cover the mortgage - they paid for themselves... I simply saw putting my money into a home as a wise investment vs the alternative... Albeit I did rent as a single Lt...

My young naive but golden hunch was that the rental market and mortgage costs had to have a direct correlation... My hypothesis was validated when the housing market crashed...

The long-term idea was to leverage these property investments as my investments - as I deemed them more reliable than the stock market investments...
At one point I owned a property in Ca, Va, and Fl - I've had the benefit of moving back into the Ca property and the Va property when I was reassigned back into those areas...

I currently still rent the Ca property; which will be paid off in about 6-7 years and will then become monthly vacation income...

The old school of thought for people approaching retirement was to payoff or sell their homes with the fear of having that undesired debt at +13% interest rates...
But the new school of thought is that TIME dictates your long-term investment strategy...
New Perceived Advantages
- Mortgage Deductions!
- NO REASON to PayOff Mortgage @ 3-4% interest rates
- There is no longer any hurry to pay off your house:
- Embrace interest free loans
- Invest in Home Equity Line of Credit

If interest rates climb back to +13% than yes payoff or sell you home before retirement...

Once I become an empty nester I am considering RENTING out a ROOM in my Va home to help financially... But not sure - the kids kinda like to be able to come home to their comfort zones for the holidays and summers...

I lived with my parents until I married. the house wasn't this big massive thing, but I loved it. dang... just thinking about it now makes me miss my parents lol :\

We live in an apartment. compared to other apartments in the area, this place is a steal, BUT it has its issues, and we want to mooooooove. we are saving up for a house, and searching the interwebs, I find lots of nice places, but ugh!!!!! property taxes, HOA fees, down payments, etc etc etc. but we really want a home. since we live at an apartment and being musicians, this place chops off our wings! lol I also love the idea of calling something our own. so if you guys remember, pray for us. I know the Lord will lead us and will make a way!

p.s. one good thing about our place is that we are cool with the maintenance guy. one call/text, and he helps us pretty much right away.

I think there is no one or even four or five answers that will fit everything. There are just too many variables.

How much is rent where you live, how much would the house payment be, and is the difference worth it to you?
How much house do you need, how much house do you want and do you know how to tell the difference between the two?
Are you willing to keep up the amount of house you want? Are you able to keep up the amount of house you need?

Also Kim you asked if age has any bearing. I think it has a LOT of bearing. If I'm 70 years old and I don't own a house, I'm not going to bother buying something I probably won't even pay off before I die. And if I did get it paid off before I kicked the bucket, I wouldn't have much time to enjoy the "Ahhhh, it's all paid for and mine!" feeling.

I bought my home two years ago. It's a huge responsibility with upkeep and taxes but I'm loving it. I can see my hard work and money going somewhere. I work 12 hour shifts in the medical field. Coming home to my own home makes all those long nursing shifts worth it. I would just advise to buy within your means. Happy house hunting !

If you're worried about buying a home and you are single you can also take in renters. It can cut the mortgage pymt into thirds. Over the yrs I've had a couple 'unsatisfactory' renters but then I just make them leave. IMO paying towards something that is yours is better, if you can swing it. Just make sure not to get in over your head. Btw, here in the States, during the recession I made out by getting Pres Obama's Home Re-Fi Modification Loan that lowered my pymts and they will b fixed now for the rest of my loan. God bless.

I currently own a home and sometimes I do wish I was still renting (though I love my house).

You can get out of debt so much easier when you don't own a home. You are constantly working on your home..which means $$$$. You can get a leaky roof and randomly have a ceiling cave in (it happens!)

So I am married and my husband can fix anything. Um...our oven on our gas stove turned on and wouldn't turn off. I turned off the gas behind it but apparently there was another line. What?! So honestly I wouldn't want to own one being single.

On top of that if you need to move far for say another job. You have to sell first and then buy a home. Or should you buy first then sell. Haha you get the idea.

Financially I had no clue what I was doing for this home. I took out a 30 year loan (no no no) and barely put a down-payment. So..essentially I spent the first 5 years paying interest only.
So if you do decide to buy, 20 % down and 10-15 year loan. That's the key.

Sound advice. I'm single and I don't know much about home repairs outside of the basics so have money set aside for emergency repairs. So far I've only had to update some plumbing and move one light fixture.

Hi! Seoul 😊 good to see you 😊finally! I was looking forward for your new thread 😊


I don't own a house but I was the one who helped my parents to build a decent house but I don't consider that my own since I have 8 siblings and 7 of them are unmarried. 2 are single parents. I feel like they need the house more than myself.


I am still dreaming to get my own home and working towards it now...it seems like it is too late for me but I am still hoping that someday I would be able to own one. Now I am renting a house together with my sister since my parents live in the city so that they can get proper health care and attention. Renting is hard I have regrets because if only I was not scared before that I can't pay my house and lot loan if I'll get both maybe I am now an owner of a simple home 😓 but maybe I was not able to support my siblings to finish their degree too if I pursued owning a home. I am still happy.


I am still alive 😊I can still work and get it 😊 and this time it is a lot more easier for me than when my siblings were still in college. But, the houses and plots now in the philippines are more expensive almost triple the price than the actual price 11 years ago. So, you know, I'll be like 60 already by the time the government will finally transfer to me my house and lot title 😄

Very helpful information, Tourist. As far as older folks buying homes, from what I understand, if the owner dies, the home will go to whoever the benefactor is in the will. Then that person will decide whether to take over the payments or sell it. So the banks shouldn't be worried about a person's age.