I'm sorry you're experiencing these feelings. I can so very much relate. Remember that HE is never far away and HE will never forsake us. If we are feeling far away from Him, it's because we are the ones pulling away, not the other way around. We are emotional creatures and it's hard to separate our emotions from our knowledge. Love is an action, it's not a feeling. Love is something we do, it's not something we feel. The recent song by Lauren Daigle, You Say, puts it into words so clearly. "You say I am loved when I don't feel a thing; You say I am strong when I think I am weak; You say I am held when I am falling short; When I don’t belong, You say that I am Yours; And I believe, oh I believe What You say of me." Believe in your identity in Him -- You are chosen, you are loved, you are forgiven, you are redeemed, you are free, you are beautiful.
Lord, we pray for you to help us in our unbelief; strengthen our faith, Father God, that we may claim our identity in you and that we may know you completely and fully. It can sometimes be so difficult to silence the lies of the enemy, Father God. Help us to believe the truth and to overcome the lies. Help us to take captive every thought and to make it obedient to Christ; renew our minds that our hearts may be changed; change us that we may be different from the world so that the world can see you in us -- that we can see you in us, Lord! Thank you, Father God. We know you will complete what you have started. In Jesus name, Amen!