You can never lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon doesn't come back, all you've lost is a regular pigeon.

I’m not sure if the OP is saying he’s single and ready to mingle?

Lol.

Don't settle for regular pigeons.

You're worth a half-trained parrot at least. One that will say I love you sometimes and repeat your ''accidental'' swear words most of the time.

To the 93-year-old lady who won the lottery recently, Hey, how you doin?

Did you know that if you light a candle during a full moon and say the name of the person you love three times you will look very stupid doing that.

Dang. Done that like ten times..

I lost track of that witty post I meant to type. Bad news man.. I wish I could hop to a far away planet and into a bioluminescent forest full of wonder. Maybe find some exotic fruit and enjoy the most amazing meal I've ever had. Yeah that sounds nice.. save some local aliens and get a cool nickname and tile in their primitive yet advanced kingdom. Vibrant colors and sounds, experience everything with the excitement of the inner child in me. As a kid I was fearless and curious about everything. Imagine exploring a world full of new things you've never seen. That sounds legit dope.

Something most people would never guess about me; I once came face-to-face with a wolf, we stared for a long while and in that moment every sound of nature was super crisp. I wonder what made it leave after a while, was I not eatable?

Maybe I'll get to face a bear next, or maybe a lion. So far, another encounter is on my bucket list. People have mentioned that the way I lean and tip on a chair that I sit on is very attractive. Maybe it's my balance and skill to not fall eh? There's always that rush of falling at any time that becomes dangerous and accelerating. You could say I'm an adrenaline junkie in small doses.

Me vs Life = well, well, well, if it isn't the consequences of my own actions. Well played, I lost

I'm trying this whole single thing all over again so I asked Alexa ''What do women want?" The darn thing has not shut up for the past three days.




Lemme explain why you should choose me;

I'm inventing a real SMART TV will start raising it's volume when you start eating chips.
For $5 I can either get you approximately 2 flowers from a florist OR I can get you an ENTIRE costco rotisserie chicken. That’s all I'm sayin. the choice is yours.
I've made mimes break their silence before. Take that as you will
Using my feet to lift toilet seats or push the flush handle at public restrooms has helped hone my ninja-like skills.
I use karate to chop vegetables.


My flaws;

You would think I am a fugitive on the run the way I react when there is a knock on my door.
I wouldn't do anything for a Klondike bar, but I would do some sketchy stuff for some coffee.
My ability to remember song lyrics from the 80's far exceeds my ability to remember why I walked into the kitchen.
Elevator music bothers me on many levels
I’m “you can only play video games on channel 3” years old.


Ps. Remember me in your Prayers like you do in your Gossips.

Pps. I won't date Amish girls because they don't know if it's a romantic candlelit dinner or just a regular candle lit dinner. Efforts wasted.

I'm trying this whole single thing all over again so I asked Alexa ''What do women want?" The darn thing has not shut up for the past three days.

Your creative mind always provides such fun and unique journeys. Brother, I never know the direction you are headed, or even your final destination. Somehow, though, after exploring your unique road traveled, I feel like I was transported to a richly cool and fascinating place. Thanks young Brother for caring to share, you brought with you some witty and clever fresh air.

Thanks OP, that was just the entertaining dose of nonsense I needed.

See... I told ya the forum livens up around this time of year.

(That's proof I've been here way too long.. )

Maybe try E-harmony or Christian Mingle.

Your creative mind always provides such fun and unique journeys. Brother, I never know the direction you are headed, or even your final destination. Somehow, though, after exploring your unique road traveled, I feel like I was transported to a richly cool and fascinating place. Thanks young Brother for caring to share, you brought with you some witty and clever fresh air.

Thanks OP, that was just the entertaining dose of nonsense I needed.

At first I thought maybe you were on a drug trip but then I read the part about the rotisserie chicken and it all made sense.

What if you sent your homing pigeon away because it keeps eating your chocolate, but it keeps coming back?