If I ever went back to pursue the field of psychology, I think there should be a specialized division for those who catfish and even more so for those who choose to fall for it, despite being heavily warned.
During the time of my membership here on CC, I usually have a current group of people whom I talk to regularly and we have often tried to warn people when they fall in love with someone who sounds suspicious. I always ask others what they think and have observed in the threads because I don't want to judge a situation prematurely or unfairly, but when it's several people noticing a number of discrepancies, most of us would usually try to warn the person in some way. I've lost count of how many people my CC friends have tried to warn over the years.
But not a single person listened. Every single one would say something like, "No, this person is real... they just have (such and such excuse, problem, story... multiplied about 1,000 time over)," even when the warning signs were glaringly obvious. They would say that other people were just jealous and trying to ruin their happiness. In other words... They put blinders over their eyes, plugs in their ears, and shouted over everyone else until they convinced themselves that what they chose to believe in their own mind was real. They would say that we couldn't prove that this person wasn't who they said they were...
But the problem is, they couldn't prove that this person actually WAS the person they said they were either. I don't know of a single person who actually went through and got to meet their suspected catfish, even though they tried repeatedly, let alone worked out a relationship with them. Rather, they would all come back with a shattered heart and then want everyone to listen to them indefinitely about how much they had been hurt, even though people had tried to warn them the entire time.
I know I should have given up trying to warn people long ago. No one ever believes.
But when you see good people here with big, loving hearts... It's hard to sit back and watch them being taken for a ride.
I hope you are the exception, Joe. I really do. Come back and tell me I was wrong if I am, please.
But please, I am genuinely asking you as a sister in Christ--listen carefully to what the people in your own thread are trying to tell you.