Men think, women think this. Women think, men think that.

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
May 12, 2016
443
365
63
#1
I read an interesting and accurate post on how men believe women think and how women believe men think. Accurate in the personal experiences, and stereo typical kinda way.

I want to start an open dialogue between men and women on here. A safe place to discuss what each sex thinks and believes about the other, and see the many different responses. A chance to bring down the barrier and get to know that not all men are alike and not all women. I know we say we know that. This is a chance to be transparent open and honest.

I also read a post about not having to answer personal questions. That is true here also. Obviously this is an open discussion about the opposite sex beliefs. So it is a given if you are male or female. If asked, you should kindly answer. if you wish not to kindly decline.

Only the general topic of sex ( outside of marriage or the marriage bed ) should be discussed. Fornication, adultery ECT... Is apart of that. If a person wishes to share their faults or sins or lack of, that is their choice. Don't go asking about personal issues.

Money, careers, ideals false or real, two incomes, submissive wife, respect, love, happiness, sex, spiritual leader, emotions, all this is has been stereo tyipical thoughts and ideals.

I will start it off from a stereo typical woman's point of view. Most women believe and feel most if not all men, show a lack of empathy. Very few men share their emotional feelings.

Men please share if this is an accurate image of men. If so was it that you was taught real men don't cry? Is it cultural? Is it still how you feel or believe? If this is not true for you please share why.

Women from the men I have heard from. Men believe most if not all women, desire power and money. (survival of the fittest) That all us women want is big, bank accounts, fancy homes and cool rides.

Women is this correct? Is so why do you feel this way? If not what do you look for in a man and why?

Ladies and gents,
Lets open the windows and air out the house.
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,897
113
#2
Good thread :)

I’ve always wondered why the men that I’ve come across in my lifetime, whether it’s family, friends, social circles, online close friends of even colleagues aren’t as sensitive as women are.

Is it male attitude (not trying to be offensive), cultural or just a alpha ego?
 
May 12, 2016
443
365
63
#3
Ok I'll start off by answering the woman's stereo typical question, through my eyes and beliefs.

I've for the most part answered this in other threads, but will highlighted what I've already said. As for me, I look at a mans heart for the Lord ( actions backed) and I look at his stability, spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically and yes financially ( living within his means, a good Stewart ) Yes, I'm attacked to certain features more than others regarding a mans physical appearance. Again already discussed.

Now I grew up in oilfield money. Fancy homes, nice ranch, designer clothes. All the fun toys. Including a PC when most homes did not have them. ( I was teaching my teachers MS Dos ) 😁now I'm still learning all this windows stuff. Anyways, the point is, I grew up with all of it. Guess what gents. I would be more content in a cabin or canvas tent. There was no love or peace in that household. IE that's why I loved the outdoors. Peace and quiet and why I become so found of the animals. No back biting😊. ( well expect Patients) if you did not pay attention to her, she would grab you by the belt and pull you back to her.) Crazy 🐎 but a sweet heart.
I've also been through 2 hurricanes, and walked away from my home. I learned early in life materialistic things come and go. They doing bring happiness, and life is more important. Ill fight till the death for those that I love. And if you hurt one of my animals ill surely show you the same. But I will not fight for worldly possessions. The Lord will and has replaced everything I've ever lost. Even things I did not need.

So for this woman, no I do not need or want a rich and powerful man. The Lord is my provider. My husband will be my help meet and I his through this fallen world. Together we will seek the Lord and carve out a life we are called to be.
 
May 12, 2016
443
365
63
#4
Good thread :)

I’ve always wondered why the men that I’ve come across in my lifetime, whether it’s family, friends, social circles, online close friends of even colleagues aren’t as sensitive as women are.

Is it male attitude (not trying to be offensive), cultural or just a alpha ego?
Agreed, coming from Texas men rarely show emotion and rarely speak to their other regarding problems in the relationship/ marriage.
Now an old fiance he was a bit different. He did talk and my abilities seemed to intimidate him. He was in fact a city boy born and raised. A moms boy at that. Strange being mom was a hardcore German woman that took no nonsense. Other than a few male friends I have not met many men that will openly discuss emotions. My ex surely didn't. I would beg him to talk to me. I'm also not a mind reader.

Anyhoo. I do know from how boys were raised around me. They were not allowed to feel any emotion other than anger. Being mad was ok. But they could not cry or was teased or whipped, they could not express sadness or loneliness. They had to be tough. If something bothered them they had to deal with it themselves, heaven forbid they shared it.

Now, I don't know how others were raised in different cultures or locations. I most assurley did NOT raise my sons that way. Though sometimes I can see my ex's bad traits in them. We learn from what we see. The only way to correct it is self exploration and self correction.
 

egeiro

Senior Member
Mar 17, 2015
336
47
28
#5
I think there are still some stereotypical view points of what men should be like or what women should be like but I suppose it might be different depending where you are from. Some cities or states might have a more traditional culture while other cities/states might be more progressive. If a cultural group still clings to an old way of life, I find that they are more inclined to hold traditional views about how men and women should be.

My husband and I look like two very average modern day citizens, I'm a Kindergarten teacher who likes pretty clothes and he's in the Defence force after being a Plumber for seven years. He talks like a man who keeps it simple and straight and I like jumping in to groups and making people feel open and welcomed.

But the funny thing is he's the romantic and I'm the one who makes sexual advances. We both cried watching the movie the notebook and he's usually the one who senses when I'm stressed about something and asks to talk about it. He's more willing to drop everything and help someone in need and I'm the one who is more inclined to tell someone to get up and walk it off. Since he's still training and I've been in my industry for longer, I am currently the bread winner as far as income goes.

While still studying at university I was in a long term relationship before I was a Christian. After two years together with my ex, I saw him enroll to two different university degrees and drop them after a short while. He then took up a part-time job at a fuel station and kept to it. At the reaching of the end of my degree, he said that our future would involve me working full-time while he figures out the rest of his life and what he wants to do. Immediately after that I broke it off with him. Why? Because those actions and words told me a lot about his character and his willingness to be a team. That was six years ago and to this day he still works part-time at a fuel station.

I'm not a money hungry women, and heck, if you felt God called you to work at a fuel station and touch the loves of people there, and there was fruit coming from being where God has situated you, then awesome, good on you. But I've been working my tooshie off since my fifteenth birthday and I value working hard towards something, and I want someone to come alongside me and be part of that.

But yeah, I've come across really emotional men in my life and really emotionally disconnected men in my life and I think it mostly comes down to personality and upbringing. I think God did design us to have natural characteristics that and more for women and more for men, but it doesn't mean we are without the other.
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#6
Good thread :)

I’ve always wondered why the men that I’ve come across in my lifetime, whether it’s family, friends, social circles, online close friends of even colleagues aren’t as sensitive as women are.

Is it male attitude (not trying to be offensive), cultural or just a alpha ego?
Cause men have better things to do.... like killing sabertooth tigers and stopping the enemy from over running the women, while they're being all sensitive.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,558
17,027
113
69
Tennessee
#7
Ok I'll start off by answering the woman's stereo typical question, through my eyes and beliefs.

I've for the most part answered this in other threads, but will highlighted what I've already said. As for me, I look at a mans heart for the Lord ( actions backed) and I look at his stability, spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically and yes financially ( living within his means, a good Stewart ) Yes, I'm attacked to certain features more than others regarding a mans physical appearance. Again already discussed.

Now I grew up in oilfield money. Fancy homes, nice ranch, designer clothes. All the fun toys. Including a PC when most homes did not have them. ( I was teaching my teachers MS Dos ) 😁now I'm still learning all this windows stuff. Anyways, the point is, I grew up with all of it. Guess what gents. I would be more content in a cabin or canvas tent. There was no love or peace in that household. IE that's why I loved the outdoors. Peace and quiet and why I become so found of the animals. No back biting😊. ( well expect Patients) if you did not pay attention to her, she would grab you by the belt and pull you back to her.) Crazy 🐎 but a sweet heart.
I've also been through 2 hurricanes, and walked away from my home. I learned early in life materialistic things come and go. They doing bring happiness, and life is more important. Ill fight till the death for those that I love. And if you hurt one of my animals ill surely show you the same. But I will not fight for worldly possessions. The Lord will and has replaced everything I've ever lost. Even things I did not need.

So for this woman, no I do not need or want a rich and powerful man. The Lord is my provider. My husband will be my help meet and I his through this fallen world. Together we will seek the Lord and carve out a life we are called to be.
You certainly have your priorities straight. I particularly enjoyed the last paragraph because it describes perfectly what my wife and I have in each other.
 
May 12, 2016
443
365
63
#8
I think I'm going to share this song. I know its a worldly song. But it hits some points I'd like to discuss.

( only the strong service, fit of the fittest) the worlds take. Have you ever considered it this way?
Back in the day. I woman sought a man for his maturity, his ability to take care of and lead his family, his character. Is it noble, has he been tested and tried? Has he gone through the battle and came out true?

I've read the Cepher. There is a small book called Tobit. It is a good story. Only 14 chapters. If you get a chance check it out.

As for me again, its stability. In all aspects of his life. To me that involves character, and maturity. Has this man been tested, has he been to war (spiritual), has he came out stronger?, has he turned from God because of it?, or closer? Is he nobility (true adopted son of God), or his he a fake wanna-be full of masks?

Enjoy the song from a different view

 
May 12, 2016
443
365
63
#9
I'm sorry I do not like this app. I will be so glad when my internet it fixed tomorrow. My phone does not change my words on any other place. Only in here. Survive was changed to service. And so on. Very frustrating.
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,644
4,305
113
#10
Men are like waffles. Women are like spaghetti. That's really what it all boils down to. (no pun intended)
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,425
2,416
113
#11
Good thread :)

I’ve always wondered why the men that I’ve come across in my lifetime, whether it’s family, friends, social circles, online close friends of even colleagues aren’t as sensitive as women are.

Is it male attitude (not trying to be offensive), cultural or just a alpha ego?
My understanding is that a lot of it is that men are more wired to solve the practical problem than provide emotional support. They want to fix it not just agree that yes this is a problem. It's not a wholly male trait as I'm wired like that too, but then my Dad has repeatedly told me that I think like a guy (at least in some ways).
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,425
2,416
113
#12
I'm sorry I do not like this app. I will be so glad when my internet it fixed tomorrow. My phone does not change my words on any other place. Only in here. Survive was changed to service. And so on. Very frustrating.
I found the typos rather amusing. And now that I know the phone is to blame I feel free to say so.
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,425
2,416
113
#13
Oh and gentlemen it is true: Women think that men should be able to read their minds.
 
May 12, 2016
443
365
63
#14
I found the typos rather amusing. And now that I know the phone is to blame I feel free to say so.
I think it is trying to auto fill words. Poorly might I add. 😒. The frustrating part is I spend more time trying to correct its goof than writing my post.

Our smart phones aren't so smart😁. I also got a bit lazy. Working in the hospital and on my PC I have dragon naturally speaking. I train the program to my southern dialect. Then all I do is talk and it types😋. Alot less correcting.

Funny if you think about it. Country bumpkin that has techy toys.:eek:

Have a good one!
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
4,091
2,275
113
#15
Although i never married for money i think women might be concerned about a mans income because theyre primarily called to be the providers and a good income usually means SECURITY and i think a lot of women..including myself like security..it really doesnt matter to me what a man does for a living..well..ok..cant be pimp or stripper...but someone who shows he can keep a job for a long time..especially for a man MY age..;)
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
4,091
2,275
113
#16
Btw..if God gives me a "next time"..i will NOT settle for a man tgat cant communicate..he might not WANT to talk bout his FEELINGS but ABLE to (among other things) :)
 

proverbs35

Senior Member
Nov 10, 2012
827
239
43
#17
My understanding is that a lot of it is that men are more wired to solve the practical problem than provide emotional support. They want to fix it not just agree that yes this is a problem. It's not a wholly male trait as I'm wired like that too, but then my Dad has repeatedly told me that I think like a guy (at least in some ways).
Why talk about a problem if you are not going to try to solve it? What's the point? I'm a big fan of problem resolution. On the other hand, I also know a lot of men who are not problem solvers too.
 
May 12, 2016
443
365
63
#18
I have heard from women including myself why men don't show as much emotion. ( that also sums up discussing emotional, spiritual and mental problems that they may be going through and lack of discussing them) Gents even though we (us ladies) expect y'all to be mind readers 😛 we are selves are not. Therefore can't fix a problem we don't know is there. Yes yes I know that one goes both ways. Ladies something we need to also remember. 😊
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,227
9,293
113
#19
We can't read minds? Shoot... Oh well.

This thread reminds me of one of the girls I pick up on the church bus route. Last Sunday she was complaining because women can't fly fighter jets. (Whether they can or can't is not the point of this post. She thought women can't fly fighter jets.) She said angrily, "We can't fly them because they say we're too emotional. Too emotional!"

I said, "Hmm, so you're getting emotional about women being called too emotional?"

Fortunately I have known this kid for years so she is familiar with my sense of humor. She just made a sour face at me and kept talking.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,227
9,293
113
#20
As for what we men think women think, and what women think we men think, I have no idea about any of it. All I know is I listen to what people say and the way their faces react and I make guesses about what they think. And what they think I think, I don't care.