Do you find it hard to be "just friends" with people of the opposite sex?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
J

Jennie-Mae

Guest
#62
I agree with LaVieEnRose. Friendships, leastways close friendships, with the opposite sex should be avoided. God has made us man and woman for a reason.

A few years back I allowed a man to be my friend. I didn’t see nothing wrong in that, and we got along well, like I did with my other, female friends. Didn’t go well. He fell in love with me and accused me of leading him on whenever I told him I thought we were just friends. He mailed me, texted me and contacted me for months after I told him no.

Maybe he was right, maybe I was giving him the impression that I was interested. I must have done something that made him start thinking like that. Either way, being friends with men is a no go 🙅. That’s my opinion.
 

PennEd

Senior Member
Apr 22, 2013
13,572
9,090
113
#63
I don't care how many Rom coms say otherwise, non married men and women should not be very close personal friends.
Doesn't mean you can't be friends, but you should keep at arms length of each other and not pour your thoughts and feelings into that person.

Men can sexually heat up very quickly, like a light bulb. Incandescent of course! Even if they initially had no intention of heating up. Women, I think, can become quickly emotionally attached which can lead to heating up like a laundry iron. Takes awhile, but burns VERY hot!

These are just realities, and ladies, I don't care what experiences you had or have, that guy you think is just a great listener, and close friend, likely has other thoughts running through his mind.

Again, you can still have plenty of opposite sex friends, as long as they are not too close.

Ok. Ready for everybody to tell me they're close friend experience isn't like that!
 

melita916

Senior Member
Aug 12, 2011
10,463
2,689
113
#64
while single, when it came to the opposite sex, I was never close friends. I have good friends, but not CLOSE friends. it was Jesus and me in that department! lol. now as a married woman, my husband is my close friend.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,363
13,726
113
#65
I don’t know why people are not allowed to have opinions.

It is beyond me. Just report my posts as not conforming to the majority’s pleasure and have me banned.

Get the snake out of the garden.
I honestly wonder why you seem to try so hard to be disliked.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#66
Personal grudge? Nemesis? Hardly. I just wanted to know why you were so adamant and strident about this particular topic. And you still haven't answered. But I gotta go to bed now so I guess I won't find out.
I want to know why you think it's your business and that you have any RIGHT to know. Again it's your pride and arrogance that leads you to believe someone owes you an answer on a subject that has NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. Grow up. It's. None. Of. Your. Business. Keep pressing her to answer and I will personally report you for harassing a user.
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
#67
I honestly wonder why you seem to try so hard to be disliked.


Could it be because of self hatred that is being projected to others? Frustrations due to various reasons, like failed relationships, if not processed well can result to self hatred or defensiveness and other self destructive behaviors. Being difficult to deal with can possibly be a cry for help.
 
L

LaVieEnRose

Guest
#68
Could it be because of self hatred that is being projected to others? Frustrations due to various reasons, like failed relationships, if not processed well can result to self hatred or defensiveness and other self destructive behaviors. Being difficult to deal with can possibly be a cry for help.
We can end the speculation. I dislike Lynx. He is self righteous and he enjoys bullying women (or at least one woman, myself). He thinks he is king of the Singles Subforum.

Well, if he is the self-appointed king, I will banish myself and stop aggravating everyone with my loud and strident opinions. Nevermind that my opinions on the vaccine thread are vociferous. I suppose that means I had a bad case of measles or something.
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
#70
We can end the speculation. I dislike Lynx. He is self righteous and he enjoys bullying women (or at least one woman, myself). He thinks he is king of the Singles Subforum.

Well, if he is the self-appointed king, I will banish myself and stop aggravating everyone with my loud and strident opinions. Nevermind that my opinions on the vaccine thread are vociferous. I suppose that means I had a bad case of measles or something.

You have a habit of banishing yourself. It is not long enough since your last banishment. Too bad you are a well known member here now and Lynx will miss you, he is probably crushing on you but too proud to admit it. The forum will be boring without you. Your opinion matter just like others.
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,897
113
#71
You are right, I don’t know you. But whatever your qualities, you are a better woman for Lynx than I am.
You know why I disagree with you? Well, just because you and Lynx don’t get along here and now, doesn’t mean you won’t in the future. I’ve seen these sorts of things happen all the time between two people who hate the guts outta eachother..... next minute they’re dating or seeing eachother romantically, AND I’m not saying that this will happen for you and Lynx but none of us know what our future holds, only God knows. Lynx might be compatible for you, or me, or neither of us.

But I do know that You have qualities that another man will find very attractive and quit saying dat you ugly, cos gurrrrrl:

1. You ain’t @Ugly (I know for a fact he’s a man)
2. You’re not ugly at all, you’re beautiful and you come with a very dry sense of humour which I get - you remind me of my sister, she is exactly like you. No lies, she even has facials to go with what she says
3. Beauty is not only outside but truly inside of a person

And I apologise for posting that post about you and Lynx. I was attempting to difuse the situation - cos das what I do.
Whether it worked or not is another thing lol.
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,643
4,304
113
#72
We can end the speculation. I dislike Lynx. He is self righteous and he enjoys bullying women (or at least one woman, myself). He thinks he is king of the Singles Subforum.

Well, if he is the self-appointed king, I will banish myself and stop aggravating everyone with my loud and strident opinions. Nevermind that my opinions on the vaccine thread are vociferous. I suppose that means I had a bad case of measles or something.
I hope you don't banish yourself. I will miss you even though your sense of sarcasm sometimes scares me lol. Just put him on ignore.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,172
9,260
113
#73
I want to know why you think it's your business and that you have any RIGHT to know. Again it's your pride and arrogance that leads you to believe someone owes you an answer on a subject that has NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. Grow up. It's. None. Of. Your. Business. Keep pressing her to answer and I will personally report you for harassing a user.
Of course it's my business. If somebody always goes off on a rant every time a certain topic comes up, it is certainly my business to ask why, and to ask why again.

No I don't have a right to know. I have a right to ask though. If I had some power or authority to force her to tell me, I would not use it because I do not in fact have a right to know. But I have every right to ask multiple times.

If you want to report something, report it. There is no evidence available in the whole forum that I have harassed anybody.
 

WineRose

Senior Member
Jan 3, 2017
3,631
265
83
Row A, Column 9
#74
Woooooo! We've something cooking in here! I'm surprised that it took me this long to notice this...

As for the OP...

...Good thing I'm a loner. ;)
 
L

LaVieEnRose

Guest
#75
I hope you don't banish yourself. I will miss you even though your sense of sarcasm sometimes scares me lol. Just put him on ignore.
Thank you, that is very kind. I am not going to delete my id, but I am going to take a break from posting. It is about time for me to go clean my classroom up and get ready for the next school year, anyway.
 
L

LaVieEnRose

Guest
#76
You have a habit of banishing yourself. It is not long enough since your last banishment. Too bad you are a well known member here now and Lynx will miss you, he is probably crushing on you but too proud to admit it. The forum will be boring without you. Your opinion matter just like others.
Thank you, I appreciate it. I am not deleting my id, I am just going to take a break from posting.

Lynx does not have a crush on me, he dislikes me and I dislike him. The loathing is mutual.
 
L

LaVieEnRose

Guest
#77
You know why I disagree with you? Well, just because you and Lynx don’t get along here and now, doesn’t mean you won’t in the future. I’ve seen these sorts of things happen all the time between two people who hate the guts outta eachother..... next minute they’re dating or seeing eachother romantically, AND I’m not saying that this will happen for you and Lynx but none of us know what our future holds, only God knows. Lynx might be compatible for you, or me, or neither of us.

But I do know that You have qualities that another man will find very attractive and quit saying dat you ugly, cos gurrrrrl:

1. You ain’t @Ugly (I know for a fact he’s a man)
2. You’re not ugly at all, you’re beautiful and you come with a very dry sense of humour which I get - you remind me of my sister, she is exactly like you. No lies, she even has facials to go with what she says
3. Beauty is not only outside but truly inside of a person

And I apologise for posting that post about you and Lynx. I was attempting to difuse the situation - cos das what I do.
Whether it worked or not is another thing lol.
Thank you for your kind words, but I am not interested in him at all. The man I marry will be a man who reads books. I am a great reader and I could never fall in love with a man who is not a reader. This is a nonegotiable with me. I must have a reader so we can talk about books.
 
L

LaVieEnRose

Guest
#78
Of course it's my business. If somebody always goes off on a rant every time a certain topic comes up, it is certainly my business to ask why, and to ask why again.

No I don't have a right to know. I have a right to ask though. If I had some power or authority to force her to tell me, I would not use it because I do not in fact have a right to know. But I have every right to ask multiple times.

If you want to report something, report it. There is no evidence available in the whole forum that I have harassed anybody.
I beg to differ. You have harrassed me, incessantly. Not being submissive, I bit back.

I never had a problem with you until I shipped you with Seoul. You have been on my case ever since. Both you and Seoul said I was spreading the rumor that you two are really going out, but I did not say that. Laura Charlotte did. I responded to her by saying, maybe so, or something to that effect.

I have no idea why you exploded like an atomic bomb because I shipped you together (in a SHIPPING thread, no less). Somehow, that made me a villain.

When I had strong, “loud”, and vociferous opinions about a grown man crushing on a teenage girl, I got attacked like I was saying something horrible.

Anyway, I no longer care about posting. I have to get ready for the next school year.

Frankly, I am astonished that you are a Tennessean. Most southern men I know are gentlemen.
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,920
9,668
113
#80
Of course it's my business. If somebody always goes off on a rant every time a certain topic comes up, it is certainly my business to ask why, and to ask why again.

No I don't have a right to know. I have a right to ask though. If I had some power or authority to force her to tell me, I would not use it because I do not in fact have a right to know. But I have every right to ask multiple times.

If you want to report something, report it. There is no evidence available in the whole forum that I have harassed anybody.

It is NOT YOUR business. If she refuses to answer, (and she doesn't have to), then stop asking her for an answer. By asking multiple times, you're just harassing her because you want to KNOW why. And as you stated here, you don't have a right OR a NEED to know.. People here go on rants all the time, but no one asks them why, a million times over. :rolleyes::rolleyes: You didn't get an answer after asking multiple times, so take her silence as an answer and move on.