I wish I wasn't sexual

I'm a young woman in my early twenties, and have been a Christian for five years. I also have Asperger's Syndrome, which makes it difficult to form and maintain relationships. Because of this, I often feel lonely. I've even told God I hated the way he made me, and that includes this part about me.

I know desire in and of itself isn't bad. I've never been in a relationship, never viewed porn, or even had sex. But it's really hard not to think of it as bad when it's been causing me nothing but pain. I don't mean to sound self-pitying, but it's the truth.

You are not alone. I too am asexual, and it's hard to be part of the world. If you need someone to talk to, hit me up.

It's not that I'm asexual. Far from it. I just wish I had a way to deal with it since I'm not married.

You and a lot of others.

It is hard, when you see your friends all get married and enjoying life while you're still single and feel alone. I think it's perfectly normal to be desiring the opposite sex at your age it's how God made humans. The key is to not let it consume your whole existence, but to keep it in perspective. It's best to take your mind off it with some hobby, reading etc....the more you feed that desire the more you feel alone, which makes you want to do something irrational that you will probably regret in the future....the key is to stay calm and think with your head not your emotions (which can cause rash decision making)....realize the culture will make you feel like you need someone when really there are a lot of happy single people....the culture likes to put everything in black and white, extremes, but what does society know? Most of society's so called "advice" or trends are really stupid and are based off unreality...they say you must have this or that (another person, gadgets, clothing etc) to be happy otherwise your "weird" if you don't.....my advice stick with the Bible...and stay close to God....don't mind the external noise of "society" telling you what you need to do....be yourself and never change for anyone.... know who you are in Christ and in yourself....

The thing is I probably would feel better if I had a few friends my age. But I really don't. I'm very shy, awkward, and not very outgoing. What's the point of having this God-given desire for relationship if it's automatically hard for me? And even though I'm a Christian (said the prayer), I sometimes am very afraid to trust God and getting even the slightest bit out of line.

So... in other words... you're normal.

Well if you need someone to talk to as a friend...I'm here

Remember Phillipians 4:13, " I can do all things through Christ who strengths me." I know sometimes life can be tough in that area for a single person. Get in your bible, pray and talk to God, the closer you draw to Him, the closer He'll draw to you.

As Ugly said, you sound quite normal.
Most of my friends are "virtual" (from this site)
the ones I do have IRL are spread about Norway + Scotland

Just be careful so you don't put yourself in harms way. Some men (and probably women too) can't take no for an answer.

My theory:
We long for a relationship because we aren't good enough at distinguishing the different types of love (we don't even have distinct words for them). In Greek there is Agape (sometimes described as selfless love), Eros (romantic/ sexual love), Philia (Affectionate, friendship) and Storge (Affectionate, often in parent- child relationship). Maybe we really need Philia or Agape, but go looking for Eros.

Though her complaint seemed to be aimed at physical needs. Sometimes a physical need is just a physical need, and not a sign of lacking in other areas.

God has chosen you and you are so special for Him and He knows everything about you and He loves you always.Don't afraid of anything- God Almighty is for you, not against you.Keep trying to communicate and be ready forgive others as well as yourself coz we all are forgiven by the blood of Jesus.

Felt like that too, no friends, noone wants me. Went to dozens of dating sites until I was exhausted from this obsession. Then I went to a Bible school. Teacher said: The Holy Spirit is madly in love with you and wants a relationship with you.
And for the need of friends I found CC.

The thing is I'd rather have friends I can actually talk face-to-face with. I had a couple friends growing up but for the most part, I was the shy, quiet one everyone overlooked. And even before I knew I have Asperger's, I knew I was different from everyone else. I love my family, but I'd also like to be chosen.

And I know someone's going to say, "Well, God chose you." But, God loves everyone that way. How is it different for any one person. Besides, when you have high-functioning autism, it's hard enough trying to have relationships with people you can sense with your five senses. So imagine how much harder it is to try and have a relationship with someone you can't sense at all.

I misunderstood. My apologies. I can't offer you any advice.

all I can say is welcome to the real world.

Why wait to be "chosen?" YOU can go befriend the OTHER lonely people who are waiting just like yourself

As an aside, if there's a Best Buddies organization near you, you should totally reach out to them..they do FANTASTIC work with partnering folks with intellectual disabilities with other people to socialize. I bet you can use your personal experience to really connect with people who probably feel the same way you do

Princess, there really is no easy answer.. The reason is because your the only one going through it, or are you?.. You said God loves everybody the same, in a way he does but he also knows every one of us are different.. He knows our hearts and he knows our needs.. There's a part in the Bible that says "before their words even leave their mouth I will answer them"... It all comes down to faith.... It's not easy... But it's worth it... Sometimes having someone to really talk too makes all the difference in the world... Someone you can express your feelings too without having to worry about anyone taking advantage of you.... Your in my prayers princess.... God bless you

God loves people as individuals and builds unique relationships with them, including interaction, time spent together, creating memories and even doing things for them they don't see until later. It may not be easy to sense God with physical senses, but unlike people, God is 100% honest, 100% understanding, and consistent; God will not throw you away or decide not to care about you. As long as you remain open and willing in your heart, God will make a way for relationship. And as your bond with God grows you can interact in deep and meaningful ways that you can sense, even if it's not exactly the same as physical senses (although sometimes even that is possible, and some day it will be normal when we are with God).

I don't know all the obstacles high-functioning autism presents to creating a bond with someone, but I believe God is greater than such a diagnosis, and it is important as new creations that we don't build our identities on the brokenness that occurs in this world, by focusing too much on such terminology. It is not who we really are, even if it is part of our experience for a time. There were times when I couldn't really feel normal human feelings and God brought it back over time, through personal growth, risks, through desire which catalyzes faith and prayer, through revelation about things in the past and spiritual things in the present that were blocking me from feeling things that were normal for everyone else, but which I had forgotten.

God knows how to put you back together, if that is the issue. and Sexuality with all its difficulties, is as I see it, an expression of how deeply we are meant to connect to others and the profound power of relationships to create and enrich life.

I wish I could see it that way. But like I said, it's borderline impossible to call something good when it's caused you nothing but pain and isolation. At times I get so sick of trying to deal with it I want to cry. Nor can I change the way I think. I've always had autism and I always will. Whatever God wants for me, I'll follow it. But that doesn't mean I'll be happy about it.