violence

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Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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I never liked that stuff. For me, I like to make the world a better place, and the less violent stuff, the better. Like PG-13 superhero violence is okay, but I don't like blood or stuff like that. God wants peace, not destruction.
are superheroes bloodless though.
 

Lanolin

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3 boys had a fight in the library...I sent them to the principals office. She gave them detention, then cut me.
 

Sculpt

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Apr 18, 2021
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um no she got HR to fire me. I was on probation but still, that was a low blow
Why'd they have you on probation? If thats not too personal.

I'm sure you'll find something else. I said a prayer for you.
 

Lanolin

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Why'd they have you on probation? If thats not too personal.

I'm sure you'll find something else. I said a prayer for you.
aw thanks
it seems like every new employee agreement has a 90 day probation period. If before 90 days it doesnt seem working out, they have the right to terminate you, or you can leave with a months pay.

In NZ, most new hires are filling a vacancy someone else left because they didnt really like the job. Also you might just have ONE days on the job training if you lucky. Otherwise you are expected to know everything right away.
 

MsMediator

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Mar 8, 2022
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3 boys had a fight in the library...I sent them to the principals office. She gave them detention, then cut me.
How did the school want you to handle this situation?

If it is a government school, I think it will be hard to fire even while on probation.
 

Lanolin

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How did the school want you to handle this situation?

If it is a government school, I think it will be hard to fire even while on probation.
I have no idea, it was a private school and I think they expected that everyone was already well behaved ?!
The primary principal micromanaged me to the point I couldnt even do my job.
 

Lanolin

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apparently one of the founders of the school embezzled $2 million dollars in donations and spent it all on his own businesses. He got home detention for 12 months. His name is still one of the 'house' names in the school.
 

Lanolin

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well nobody seems to know how to deal with violence on here

the boys that were fighting in the library were not defending anyone else. They were fighting cos they didnt like each other. I dont think they were fighting just because their families were from different countries (one was Persian, another was Russian and the third was Chinese) ....but who really knows why boys fight rather than leave other alone if they cant get along.

Keeping them separated when they wee all stuck in the same class just seemed futile.
 

Lanolin

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My hunch is the popularity of vaping these days is to keep the peace as they act like the old peace pipes.... if people are too stoned to fight then its better than the alternative. Perhaps.
 
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FollowingtheWay

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My hunch is the popularity of vaping these days is to keep the peace as they act like the old peace pipes.... if people are too stoned to fight then its better than the alternative. Perhaps.
vaping. It’s interesting. In USA briefly it was being marketed as a safe alternative to tobacco. Later the study came out about popcorn lung and excess moisture constantly being inhaled that will actually mold inside you. I had a 22 year old co-worker who got told by a medical doctor this year if he didn’t stop vaping he would be dead from debilitated lung function within 2years at his current excessive vaping use. I think it’s popularity is all the flavors, it’s like tasting your favorite candy plus the nicotine high which is why so many kids find it appealing. Most establishments allow vaping but still ban conventional tobacco use.
 
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FollowingtheWay

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well nobody seems to know how to deal with violence on here

the boys that were fighting in the library were not defending anyone else. They were fighting cos they didnt like each other. I dont think they were fighting just because their families were from different countries (one was Persian, another was Russian and the third was Chinese) ....but who really knows why boys fight rather than leave other alone if they cant get along.

Keeping them separated when they wee all stuck in the same class just seemed futile.
sounds like untrained or undisciplined boys doing what boys do. God gave little boys an inherited trait prone to violent behavior. Boys want to feel powerful. God intended this for good. Look at the statistics of male prison inmates versus female prison inmates. Men have a predisposition to violence. God made that predisposition because God made man to bear His warrior image in our souls deepest level to protect and defend. These boys unfortunately don’t know how to harness that predisposition for good purposes and they have found a way to selfishly abuse the strength and power God gave them. They actually need a mature man in their lives to give them an example of what proper use of that strength looks like. Boys see men as an authoritative figure by default. Mature men are what boys use to gauge how to think, how to act by nature.

A boys natural bend towards woman will always be nurture and comfort . This is why boys test female teachers so much, they don’t respect a female authority naturally. Boys respect male authority by nature. Lots of study’s out there on this. Sadly mature male authorities in school systems are no longer a thing. At least here in USA. The educational career in the USA from top to bottom dominated by women. This is why the boys fight. They need a male authority in that library
 
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FollowingtheWay

Guest
sounds like untrained or undisciplined boys doing what boys do. God gave little boys an inherited trait prone to violent behavior. Boys want to feel powerful. God intended this for good. Look at the statistics of male prison inmates versus female prison inmates. Men have a predisposition to violence. God made that predisposition because God made man to bear His warrior image in our souls deepest level to protect and defend. These boys unfortunately don’t know how to harness that predisposition for good purposes and they have found a way to selfishly abuse the strength and power God gave them. They actually need a mature man in their lives to give them an example of what proper use of that strength looks like. Boys see men as an authoritative figure by default. Mature men are what boys use to gauge how to think, how to act by nature.

A boys natural bend towards woman will always be nurture and comfort . This is why boys test female teachers so much, they don’t respect a female authority naturally. Boys respect male authority by nature. Lots of study’s out there on this. Sadly mature male authorities in school systems are no longer a thing. At least here in USA. The educational career in the USA from top to bottom dominated by women. This is why the boys fight. They need a male authority in that library
Another thought. If you have doubts to my position. I’d encourage you to seek a male authority figure in your government such as a male army commander or male fire fighter in uniform and have them do a presentation in your library. Give the presenter permission to scold the boys in the same way you have in past if they act out. You will see the mere presence of a male authority in the room addressing their behavior will dynamically change how they act. You may see them sit up straight in their seats , and pay attention where they never did before. Guarantee it.
 

Lanolin

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I noticed that the boys that actually caused the most trouble were in classes that had male teachers.
The male teachers did not come in with them during library time.

My previous school that had a male teacher did come with his class but even he could not handle certain boys, who challenged him. I was ok with them though, but yes I had to protect the girls from the boys.

It was always boys that got banned from the library. The older boys seemed alright, its just the young ones that didnt know any better.

I had a few girl bullies too but as long as I kept them away from others they didnt do too much damage. Usually did this by giving them jobs to do.
 

Lanolin

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The male principal did come once to scold a year 2 class acting up but he was ineffective.

I did threaten one boy with calling the female principal (who would call his parents) and that worked for a while by putting the fear of God in him lol. But the male teacher had to be extreme by removing reward stickers and banning one boy from library for 3 weeks. It was a drama.

His mum was on his side though and suggested he work in the library after school, but as library was only open to seniors after school I said he could only come if she was there. Then the mum said she would come but would have to bring her 2 year old as well. lol

I never got to train the boy after school as by that time the primary principal had cut me.

I amnot sure after that what happened to those boys whether they got transferred to another class, school or what. What Im certain is one teacher quit. And their replacement quit as well. They had to get relievers in too. And vaping is. a big problem in schools now. Many students get suspended but then that ruins their education/learning prospects and doesnt address the issue for them.
 
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FollowingtheWay

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This is perhaps the point I’m trying to make here. This is a study on elephants. There is growing evidence this is a human trait as well.
https://www.nathab.com/blog/older-male-elephants-keep-younger-males-calm/
Excerpted from article

“The adolescent elephants were considerably less aggressive towards non-elephants when in the presence of adult elephants. The research suggests that older adults are a social buffer against risk as they are more experienced and therefore have a more accurate understanding of threats. Even more so, this research teaches us that having older males present around younger adolescents can reduce the chances of extreme behavior and wildlife-elephant conflicts. Unfortunately, male bull elephants are often targeted for trophy hunting. This is further evidence of the damage poaching has on elephant populations.”
 

Lanolin

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I think it comes down to the lack of father figure in their own lives just a hunch for those boys that were causing trouble.

In prisons that was almost ALWAYS the case.

the boys and girls that were the most needy in the library had no dads. I cant be a replacement dad obviously. But I can connect them with Jesus thats the only thing and then they can have a relationship with their Heavenly Father

I do notice a BIG difference between christian and non christian children . Christian children are a lot more secure and they have this light about them.

Im talkin about genuine christian children not pastors kids lol. Pastors kids have a reputation for being two faced bullies and sad to say thats quite true.
 

Lanolin

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What I would have done had it been allowed is have a big brother library monitors come in for those boys and had a mentoring/buddy programme. Cos their male teachers cant be there with them ALL the time.