What are Your Thoughts About Financially Independent Women?
- Thread starter seoulsearch
- Start date
-
Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.
If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!
To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
The problem that men find in the Western world is that the system is loaded against them. That is a recipe for bitterness and resentment, great evils that poison them. It will spew out at any opportunity and turns people away. Been there, done that. My ex ignored a court ruling and disappeared with my two children. Her last words were that I was just the biological father. She told me 15 years later that she lied to the kids to shut them up, saying that it was my choice not to see them. I was compelled to pay child support to kids I did not see grow up (they were 8 and 6 when this happened.) Not every marriage ends so messily, but there are plenty of cases where men suffered more than I did. There was not a great deal of property to settle, so I was not ripped off in that way.
It took a couple of years to come to terms with this situation. I had tremendous help from a brother in Christ. I also knew the principle of forgiveness from the heart, not just the mind. When (miraculously) I met my ex again, after 15 years, there was no bitterness or resentment. I was able to meet my now grown children. God is able to restore the years the locusts have eaten.
The root of the problem is expectations. If you are looking for a life partner to meet all your emotional needs, you are in trouble already. No one is that good. We have a place in our inner being that only God can fill. Once we are satisfied with Jesus, we will not seek the impossible from a spouse.
It took a couple of years to come to terms with this situation. I had tremendous help from a brother in Christ. I also knew the principle of forgiveness from the heart, not just the mind. When (miraculously) I met my ex again, after 15 years, there was no bitterness or resentment. I was able to meet my now grown children. God is able to restore the years the locusts have eaten.
The root of the problem is expectations. If you are looking for a life partner to meet all your emotional needs, you are in trouble already. No one is that good. We have a place in our inner being that only God can fill. Once we are satisfied with Jesus, we will not seek the impossible from a spouse.
-
1
-
1
- Show all
Yes to all this. Unless if you're a Chad, it is very difficult for men to go out with women. We don't have a problem with women that are independent. That's not what we have a problem with. We don't like to be beaten down, belittled, and demonized just because we don't meet standards that many women (not all of them) setup. Many of them say they want a good man who love and care for them, someone that will treat them good, but at their most honest, these women want a guy that's taller than them, makes a six figure income, a 9 or 10 for physical looks, and a bad boy attitude.
If they settle for those don't get those features, those guys are slapped with so many rules, regulations, and boundaries that if they break one, the relationship is over. In addition to that, the guy sacrifices much of his time and money, with hardly any left for himself, just to keep the relationship to his woman somewhat happy. Even then, these women are still not satisfied. They'll keep these men around until they find the "better deal."
If there are kids involved, why would a strong financially independent woman need alimony from a guy they say is a dead beat? To me, it doesn't sound like they're independent, and what ends up happening with that alimony is it doesn't go towards the children. It go towards the selfish things that these type of women want: designer clothes, a brand new sports car, a giant home, luxurious vacations, etc. The men have no say as to how the alimony is allocated. It's a bad deal across the board.
Again, it's not all women that do this. However, all this stuff that these kind of women setup for normal guys, NONE OF IT applies to the Chads out there. Those kind of men can do, say, and act however they want, as far as these women are concerned. They practically worship these type of men, and what's sad is these guys treat women horribly, but they continue to desire and pursue them. Those women, even after a nasty break up, NEVER let them go. They go as far as trying to get them back.
Some of the ladies and males on here will say "THAT'S NOT TRUE, WHY WOULD THEY GO BACK TO THEM?" As mentioned in the last paragraph, they worship Chad and believe they are entitled to them. The last woman I dated was engaged to such a man. Every condemnation of the guy was always followed up by a compliment or two. She even stayed in contact with the guy, even after the 5-7 year period since they had called off their engagement. The guy took her money, lied to her, manipulated her, misled her, took advantage of her, and even forced himself onto her (the details are graphic, too). I never met the guy, but everything this woman and her sister told me, he was not a good person. According to her sister, the engagement ring this guy got the woman I dated was a fake, but he didn't do much to convince this woman that it was real. Even after the breakup, she carried the ring around, as if it was a reminder of some beautiful thing she lost, even though it was based on a lie.
So if any woman here is truly strong financially and independent, that's great. Truthfully: men don't care. The average guy doesn't think about how much a woman makes. We care more about the relationships we want to be in. As followers in Christ, we care about the relationships that God had set up for us. One of the most important aspects of this is a woman respecting and submitting to a man. It doesn't mean that God wants women to be slaves for us. Not at all. What it means is we want to have value in the relationship, and if women want men to lead and take the brunt of the responsibility, ladies, you have to follow through in what we need you to do. We will love you because not only it's a command that God had set up, but also we like to be desired and valued. And it feels good when a woman enjoys having us around and actually cares about us.
But, just as this man implying, men are at a massive disadvantage. The men at the very top are the only ones many women want, and it drives average guys out of the dating world. Many of them are good men. Good women who actually want good men are then stuck with horrible guys to choose from because the decent males are afraid and fed up to even try anymore. Maybe if these strong financially independent women overhauled their standards and preferences, they'd find good godly men. Some food for thought.
If they settle for those don't get those features, those guys are slapped with so many rules, regulations, and boundaries that if they break one, the relationship is over. In addition to that, the guy sacrifices much of his time and money, with hardly any left for himself, just to keep the relationship to his woman somewhat happy. Even then, these women are still not satisfied. They'll keep these men around until they find the "better deal."
If there are kids involved, why would a strong financially independent woman need alimony from a guy they say is a dead beat? To me, it doesn't sound like they're independent, and what ends up happening with that alimony is it doesn't go towards the children. It go towards the selfish things that these type of women want: designer clothes, a brand new sports car, a giant home, luxurious vacations, etc. The men have no say as to how the alimony is allocated. It's a bad deal across the board.
Again, it's not all women that do this. However, all this stuff that these kind of women setup for normal guys, NONE OF IT applies to the Chads out there. Those kind of men can do, say, and act however they want, as far as these women are concerned. They practically worship these type of men, and what's sad is these guys treat women horribly, but they continue to desire and pursue them. Those women, even after a nasty break up, NEVER let them go. They go as far as trying to get them back.
Some of the ladies and males on here will say "THAT'S NOT TRUE, WHY WOULD THEY GO BACK TO THEM?" As mentioned in the last paragraph, they worship Chad and believe they are entitled to them. The last woman I dated was engaged to such a man. Every condemnation of the guy was always followed up by a compliment or two. She even stayed in contact with the guy, even after the 5-7 year period since they had called off their engagement. The guy took her money, lied to her, manipulated her, misled her, took advantage of her, and even forced himself onto her (the details are graphic, too). I never met the guy, but everything this woman and her sister told me, he was not a good person. According to her sister, the engagement ring this guy got the woman I dated was a fake, but he didn't do much to convince this woman that it was real. Even after the breakup, she carried the ring around, as if it was a reminder of some beautiful thing she lost, even though it was based on a lie.
So if any woman here is truly strong financially and independent, that's great. Truthfully: men don't care. The average guy doesn't think about how much a woman makes. We care more about the relationships we want to be in. As followers in Christ, we care about the relationships that God had set up for us. One of the most important aspects of this is a woman respecting and submitting to a man. It doesn't mean that God wants women to be slaves for us. Not at all. What it means is we want to have value in the relationship, and if women want men to lead and take the brunt of the responsibility, ladies, you have to follow through in what we need you to do. We will love you because not only it's a command that God had set up, but also we like to be desired and valued. And it feels good when a woman enjoys having us around and actually cares about us.
But, just as this man implying, men are at a massive disadvantage. The men at the very top are the only ones many women want, and it drives average guys out of the dating world. Many of them are good men. Good women who actually want good men are then stuck with horrible guys to choose from because the decent males are afraid and fed up to even try anymore. Maybe if these strong financially independent women overhauled their standards and preferences, they'd find good godly men. Some food for thought.
How did you miss Kauko, in this forum? He was ALL about the woman being financially dependent on him. 
And yeah, there are guys like him in real life.
And yeah, there are guys like him in real life.
Besides Kauko, you hear lots of people you know personally having a problem with women being financially independent? Didn't think so. It's not an issue, except for Kauko. lol
-
1
- Show all
Believe me, it IS an issue. Kauko just became (briefly) infamous here in the forum for harping on it so long.
https://christianchat.com/christian...ere-single-christian-girls-in-finland.200207/
48 pages long, so get ready for a long read. But you asked for it.
Basically he wants to find a meek, dependent girl who will worship him and never go out of his sight.
https://christianchat.com/christian...ere-single-christian-girls-in-finland.200207/
48 pages long, so get ready for a long read. But you asked for it.
Basically he wants to find a meek, dependent girl who will worship him and never go out of his sight.
-
1
- Show all
Believe me, it IS an issue. Kauko just became (briefly) infamous here in the forum for harping on it so long.
https://christianchat.com/christian...ere-single-christian-girls-in-finland.200207/
48 pages long, so get ready for a long read. But you asked for it.
Basically he wants to find a meek, dependent girl who will worship him and never go out of his sight.
https://christianchat.com/christian...ere-single-christian-girls-in-finland.200207/
48 pages long, so get ready for a long read. But you asked for it.
Basically he wants to find a meek, dependent girl who will worship him and never go out of his sight.
You know, one red rock on a white sands beach is not a red rock problem.
So you mean Kauko is an issue. Society trashing independent women is not.
You know, one red rock on a white sands beach is not a red rock problem.
You know, one red rock on a white sands beach is not a red rock problem.
So you mean Kauko is an issue. Society trashing independent women is not.
You know, one red rock on a white sands beach is not a red rock problem.
You know, one red rock on a white sands beach is not a red rock problem.
-
1
- Show all
That's the crazy thing sometime it has to do with what one focuses on.What your saying about a red rock is true but people are crazy.The bible says in the last days all nations will go mad = crazy.
We are to be hopeful and ready for Christ's return. When Christ was here, he said he didn't know when it was going to happen, and that only God does. We need to keep it that way. We know the 1st century christians thought it was going to happen any second. Two thousand years later... I personally don't think we should be making the same mistake the 1st christians were making... focusing on the "end times", or at least saying it is the "end times", unless you mean it's always the end times, like the day Christ went to heaven. What do you think?
Since our god be money in this case. i guess we all have to teach woman the Rich Dad poor dad doctrine.How to acquire assets will keeping our liabilities to a minimum.Lets start here:The main difference between assets and liabilities is that assets provide a future economic benefit, while liabilities present a future obligation.Your never go broke by making your self a prophet,,,Your become rich in faith the love of god.
I'm not really even suppose to recommend videos because it's a violation of the second commandment.So is being on computer.However those videos are so abundant you could just typed it in on you tube.Simple doctrine financial education so you can see the difference between whats makes one rich and what puts one in debt.Very secular but could be applied to investing in god.