How do you meet other Christian women during Covid?
- Thread starter Chilidogs
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I don't blame you for avoiding dating apps.
But you want to know how to meet people in person at a time when many don't want to meet new people in person?
Go to the places where people don't care about such things cause thats your best shot.
Though chances are you won't want a person like that.
I don't use dating apps. And met my current gf on CC. I wasn't looking and neither was she. People going on the prowl here don't usually last long as the regulars tend to not respond well to it.
Maybe don't worry about dating and just make friends and maybe something will come from that.
But you want to know how to meet people in person at a time when many don't want to meet new people in person?
Go to the places where people don't care about such things cause thats your best shot.
Though chances are you won't want a person like that.
I don't use dating apps. And met my current gf on CC. I wasn't looking and neither was she. People going on the prowl here don't usually last long as the regulars tend to not respond well to it.
Maybe don't worry about dating and just make friends and maybe something will come from that.
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It's hard to meet godly women nowadays that want to go out with godly men, let alone just simply meeting for like a coffee. Last woman I was interested in was a pastor's daughter and when I asked her out, she gave me the dreaded 'I don't know' answer, only to find out a week later that she was taken. Not that she had to tell me she had a bf, but a simple 'no' would have sufficed. So I understand because it's only natural to meet in the same place and room when meeting someone, and the whole narrative of webcam dating is just as good as in person is not true. Now you need some advice on where to meet single Christian women because you don't know where to meet them in today's world. I think I can, at least, point you in the right direction and offer advice on women in general. Keep in mind, some of what I'm about to say may not be popular, but hear me out on this. Although, believe me when I say I'm in the same boat you are, so I'm only here to help.
First off, in today's world, and a sad truth, you won't meet women at church buildings that want to date. It's not happening. Again, my example of the pastor's daughter should be evident enough. Her bf she didn't meet at church. Can't say where because I simply don't know, but it wasn't at a church gathering. Your best bet is to go to social events or businesses that provide entertainment and fun that churches are not putting on. I get that a lot of people at these types of places may have a lot of single non-Christians, but at the same time there WILL be a lot of single Christians. Of course, you may not know any of this unless you talk to them.
Where do you go? Well, depends on what you like and I'm sure you may have a hobby or two you have, or you may want to pickup a new one that you have been always interested in trying. Just make sure it's something that both men and women enjoy doing. Now, don't let me tell you, one way or another, what to do, but allow me to make a suggestion:
Consider taking up dancing. I'm currently doing ballroom dancing, and, wow, lots of women go. And why is that so many women go? Simple, women LOVE, and I mean REALLY LOVE, to dance. Don't let ANY of them fool you into believing that they don't because they do. It shows them off and at events like that it gives them a chance to meet men. There has not been one woman that I have met that said they're uninterested because (and no exaggeration) every single one has told me that they want to go and learn but said either their bfs or husbands don't like it. Single women especially love it and their giddy at the opportunity they get to do it.
I've actually come to really enjoy it myself. It's fun, good exercise, something different to do on a Friday night (or even during the week), and I get to meet new people. I can say, without bragging, that I'm a decent dancer, although I'm just a beginner by the standards of my private lessons (but that will change after next week, ask later). Even then, women at the place I go to WANT to dance with me because they know I can lead well and I would show them off properly. And these are good looking women, and if you can show that you have good rhythm and footwork, they will come to you. With that said, let me go on to the last piece of advice.
Take this for what it's worth, although it's a little more complex than what I'm about to say: don't pursue. Why's that? Not to simplify it too much, but many women will perceive it as you being desperate and it can be seen as a turn off, even though you may not be desperate (and I'm not saying you are nor implying it). As followers in Christ, yes, stand bold in faith and don't budge on it, but don't press it onto others. It'll turn people away when they might be missing out on a chance to be saved. You have to, in some respect, ease it on to them. There's more to it, obviously, but let's keep it simple. The same respect comes to women. Don't fawn all over them. You do that then they will walk away from you. Instead focus on what you are doing at the moment. They'll come if you simply take some of the focus off them.
I already have a small group of them wanting my attention. Nothing romantic (although one in particular probably does, long story), but they want to have a friendship with me. I have no problem with it because my objective is to meet new people and do things with them. Some of them I do suspect to be Christians and single. However, I will still be focusing on my dancing and improving it. I'm actually taking it on the road and finding other places that have live music and dancing so I can meet even more people.
So don't get hung up on one person. Put your trust in God and He'll point you in the right direction of where other followers will be. He may even put you into some of the most unusual spots where they may be. Don't pass up potential signs if they present themselves. If they do lead you to a person, get to know them, enjoy what you are doing together, and if you feel up to it, ask them out, but again, don't pursue when starting out. And when you do ask them out, if their answer is anything but 'yes', it's 'no.' If that happens, move on. Anyway, hope this helps, and sorry it went on longer than expected. Just thought I add some context to help with your situation because, as mentioned earlier, you and I are in the same boat. Good luck to you!
First off, in today's world, and a sad truth, you won't meet women at church buildings that want to date. It's not happening. Again, my example of the pastor's daughter should be evident enough. Her bf she didn't meet at church. Can't say where because I simply don't know, but it wasn't at a church gathering. Your best bet is to go to social events or businesses that provide entertainment and fun that churches are not putting on. I get that a lot of people at these types of places may have a lot of single non-Christians, but at the same time there WILL be a lot of single Christians. Of course, you may not know any of this unless you talk to them.
Where do you go? Well, depends on what you like and I'm sure you may have a hobby or two you have, or you may want to pickup a new one that you have been always interested in trying. Just make sure it's something that both men and women enjoy doing. Now, don't let me tell you, one way or another, what to do, but allow me to make a suggestion:
Consider taking up dancing. I'm currently doing ballroom dancing, and, wow, lots of women go. And why is that so many women go? Simple, women LOVE, and I mean REALLY LOVE, to dance. Don't let ANY of them fool you into believing that they don't because they do. It shows them off and at events like that it gives them a chance to meet men. There has not been one woman that I have met that said they're uninterested because (and no exaggeration) every single one has told me that they want to go and learn but said either their bfs or husbands don't like it. Single women especially love it and their giddy at the opportunity they get to do it.
I've actually come to really enjoy it myself. It's fun, good exercise, something different to do on a Friday night (or even during the week), and I get to meet new people. I can say, without bragging, that I'm a decent dancer, although I'm just a beginner by the standards of my private lessons (but that will change after next week, ask later). Even then, women at the place I go to WANT to dance with me because they know I can lead well and I would show them off properly. And these are good looking women, and if you can show that you have good rhythm and footwork, they will come to you. With that said, let me go on to the last piece of advice.
Take this for what it's worth, although it's a little more complex than what I'm about to say: don't pursue. Why's that? Not to simplify it too much, but many women will perceive it as you being desperate and it can be seen as a turn off, even though you may not be desperate (and I'm not saying you are nor implying it). As followers in Christ, yes, stand bold in faith and don't budge on it, but don't press it onto others. It'll turn people away when they might be missing out on a chance to be saved. You have to, in some respect, ease it on to them. There's more to it, obviously, but let's keep it simple. The same respect comes to women. Don't fawn all over them. You do that then they will walk away from you. Instead focus on what you are doing at the moment. They'll come if you simply take some of the focus off them.
I already have a small group of them wanting my attention. Nothing romantic (although one in particular probably does, long story), but they want to have a friendship with me. I have no problem with it because my objective is to meet new people and do things with them. Some of them I do suspect to be Christians and single. However, I will still be focusing on my dancing and improving it. I'm actually taking it on the road and finding other places that have live music and dancing so I can meet even more people.
So don't get hung up on one person. Put your trust in God and He'll point you in the right direction of where other followers will be. He may even put you into some of the most unusual spots where they may be. Don't pass up potential signs if they present themselves. If they do lead you to a person, get to know them, enjoy what you are doing together, and if you feel up to it, ask them out, but again, don't pursue when starting out. And when you do ask them out, if their answer is anything but 'yes', it's 'no.' If that happens, move on. Anyway, hope this helps, and sorry it went on longer than expected. Just thought I add some context to help with your situation because, as mentioned earlier, you and I are in the same boat. Good luck to you!
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Good question.
For me personally, it was easier to meet someone online to start with as I am an introvert and am more adept at written communication at first and then the verbal communication flows more easy. I met my wife on this site who is also a member shortly after I joined. It just sort of happened. Turns out we lived only about 120 miles away from each other so that made it easier to meet physically.
I would suggest meeting a woman at a laundry mat and act like the helpless bachelor struggling to separate the whites. Some single woman may take pity on you in an amusing way and try and try to instruct you. Or maybe someone at work. Grocery stores are a good bet. You may bump into your future wife at Walmart in the produce section while thumping the honey dews to see which one is ripe.
I wish you well in this endeavor and, of course, pray about this.
For me personally, it was easier to meet someone online to start with as I am an introvert and am more adept at written communication at first and then the verbal communication flows more easy. I met my wife on this site who is also a member shortly after I joined. It just sort of happened. Turns out we lived only about 120 miles away from each other so that made it easier to meet physically.
I would suggest meeting a woman at a laundry mat and act like the helpless bachelor struggling to separate the whites. Some single woman may take pity on you in an amusing way and try and try to instruct you. Or maybe someone at work. Grocery stores are a good bet. You may bump into your future wife at Walmart in the produce section while thumping the honey dews to see which one is ripe.
I wish you well in this endeavor and, of course, pray about this.
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I forgot to mention this in my post:
Worst place, imo, to meet a Christian woman is a bar. There's nothing wrong with going to a winery because the crowds there want to have fun and enjoy themselves, or a place where they do serve alcohol but is much more upscale and care about the professionalism and well being of the atmosphere is fine too (so long as not too much of it is consumed). The places I'm advising to stay away from are like your dive/frat bars. Trust me, the people at those places are looking for only two things: inebriation and hook ups. That's it. Just remember that if you go out and want to meet people.
Worst place, imo, to meet a Christian woman is a bar. There's nothing wrong with going to a winery because the crowds there want to have fun and enjoy themselves, or a place where they do serve alcohol but is much more upscale and care about the professionalism and well being of the atmosphere is fine too (so long as not too much of it is consumed). The places I'm advising to stay away from are like your dive/frat bars. Trust me, the people at those places are looking for only two things: inebriation and hook ups. That's it. Just remember that if you go out and want to meet people.
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Im not sure this will work either. It has not worked for me atleast. "Entertainment and fun" do you really think you can find a true hearted single Christian there ? I can tell you, I have searched in all kinds of places including churches but also college (when I was younger), social events, groceries, museums, parks, libraries, classical music concerts, etc even tried in a table tennis event once, and this is what I found: NOTHING.
Dancing REALLY ??? This is one of the places I avoided in my search ! I always knew it was one of the worst places to search what I wanted. Listen me, women in dancing are HUGE CHEATS. Just like bar, nurses, gym women are. They have got all the men they want. You even said there were women with boyfriends and husbands who wanted to go dancing ! And most likely they have gone secretly and danced with who knows who. Know why ? THEY WANT TO CHEAT ON THEM ! If they have not done it already. They dont believe in marriage or relationships, they just want FUN ! Avoid this landfill if you dont want a promiscuous girl who will cheat 50 times on you "just learning to dance". The kind of people you will see there is not much different from the kind of people you see in a bar or club.
LOL you have no experience at all with dance women. They dont want to enter a relationship with you. They want to obtain a particular interest from you, which can be anything from money to an one night stand. They want to ruin your life. Avoid them ! Dont let one of them deceive you !
So you say the best way to catch a woman is doing nothing. LOL, this is actually the best way to be an invisible loner without any female ever thinking in you forever. If you want a chance with a woman you have to man up, find the right time and start talking to her.
They probably want something about you, not you as a person.
Fake Christians who say they are just for contenting their parents.
So that God gives you in a tray everything you want just sit down on the chair. And trust him He will do...
Dancing REALLY ??? This is one of the places I avoided in my search ! I always knew it was one of the worst places to search what I wanted. Listen me, women in dancing are HUGE CHEATS. Just like bar, nurses, gym women are. They have got all the men they want. You even said there were women with boyfriends and husbands who wanted to go dancing ! And most likely they have gone secretly and danced with who knows who. Know why ? THEY WANT TO CHEAT ON THEM ! If they have not done it already. They dont believe in marriage or relationships, they just want FUN ! Avoid this landfill if you dont want a promiscuous girl who will cheat 50 times on you "just learning to dance". The kind of people you will see there is not much different from the kind of people you see in a bar or club.
LOL you have no experience at all with dance women. They dont want to enter a relationship with you. They want to obtain a particular interest from you, which can be anything from money to an one night stand. They want to ruin your life. Avoid them ! Dont let one of them deceive you !
So you say the best way to catch a woman is doing nothing. LOL, this is actually the best way to be an invisible loner without any female ever thinking in you forever. If you want a chance with a woman you have to man up, find the right time and start talking to her.
They probably want something about you, not you as a person.
Fake Christians who say they are just for contenting their parents.
So that God gives you in a tray everything you want just sit down on the chair. And trust him He will do...
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I'm sure He will because you seem like a good guy who knows what he wants. Just remember: nothing ventured, nothing gained. And don't be discouraged if you don't right away. I'm 35 years old single man, and I had run ins with women who I thought might have been "the one" only to find out that they weren't. Even if their beliefs seemed to have lined up with mine, they turned out to be something else entirely, or they simply were not interested and not upfront with me about it. If you find yourself in situations that I was in, walk away and learn from them. God has your best interests in mind so pray about them, and pray for those people you come across.
I'll leave you with this last example: I dated a woman about a year ago and we were getting close, at least I thought we were. One day, she stopped talking to me, and it lasted for about a week or two. I didn't know what it was because this woman had all sorts of stuff going on last year. I talked to an old pastor of mine, explained the situation to him. Keep in mind, this woman wasn't a Christian, and I thought at the time that I could show her the light of Christ and she can be saved. I told the pastor this and he mentioned that this woman might have been wounded spiritually and needed time. He also mentioned even if this woman had broke up with me, I may have planted a seed so that another godly man came along, he would make that seed grow. So I'm hoping that I did, and there have been cases out there like that, where one Christian was with someone, shown this unsaved person the way, only to be furthered by another Christian.
Today, I haven't heard from the woman. We haven't spoken since October, so I don't know what she's been up to, other than her sister (who I'm friends with) telling me the dopey things she's done. But I must have made an impact on her because she told her sister that she regrets calling off the relationship we had together. She lived a very rough life, and had dated men that were not good at all. I was the first one to come along that the not only her family liked but also wanted to show her the generosity she never really got. That and I never demanded anything from her, which she wasn't use to. It was as if she liked how she was treated. As mentioned earlier, though, if you find yourself in this type of situation, walk away and learn from it. And pray for that person. You might be doing what God has called you to do for that person. He may even have you meet that special someone sooner than you expect. It's times where they are the most unlikely that these things happen. Anyway, you take care, man!
I'll leave you with this last example: I dated a woman about a year ago and we were getting close, at least I thought we were. One day, she stopped talking to me, and it lasted for about a week or two. I didn't know what it was because this woman had all sorts of stuff going on last year. I talked to an old pastor of mine, explained the situation to him. Keep in mind, this woman wasn't a Christian, and I thought at the time that I could show her the light of Christ and she can be saved. I told the pastor this and he mentioned that this woman might have been wounded spiritually and needed time. He also mentioned even if this woman had broke up with me, I may have planted a seed so that another godly man came along, he would make that seed grow. So I'm hoping that I did, and there have been cases out there like that, where one Christian was with someone, shown this unsaved person the way, only to be furthered by another Christian.
Today, I haven't heard from the woman. We haven't spoken since October, so I don't know what she's been up to, other than her sister (who I'm friends with) telling me the dopey things she's done. But I must have made an impact on her because she told her sister that she regrets calling off the relationship we had together. She lived a very rough life, and had dated men that were not good at all. I was the first one to come along that the not only her family liked but also wanted to show her the generosity she never really got. That and I never demanded anything from her, which she wasn't use to. It was as if she liked how she was treated. As mentioned earlier, though, if you find yourself in this type of situation, walk away and learn from it. And pray for that person. You might be doing what God has called you to do for that person. He may even have you meet that special someone sooner than you expect. It's times where they are the most unlikely that these things happen. Anyway, you take care, man!
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Meet in the eyes lol most people now are wearing mask 😅
Anyways...nowadays it seems like online meet up is quite the normal thing... Unless you wanna volunteer...well, many churches and charitable institutions these days are doing pantry to help those in need so maybe do like that kind of thing... 🤔
Anyways...nowadays it seems like online meet up is quite the normal thing... Unless you wanna volunteer...well, many churches and charitable institutions these days are doing pantry to help those in need so maybe do like that kind of thing... 🤔
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Gentlemen, these are the type of women (and I'm assuming this is a woman who commented) you NEED to avoid if you want to live a good and godly life. They proclaim to be Christians and know what a man needs. I've encountered women like this before, and all they do is want to bring you down and belittle you. They'll tell you how men should act, where to go, and what to do, only for these men to be disappointed and depressed, as if they have no worth. Even when men follow what these women say, down to the very last detail, men that take the advice get burned badly.
In this case, this person comes out of a place ignorance, arrogance, and condescension. She offers nothing but a worldly viewpoint, and brings nothing of value to the table. Yes, we as men should man up and go talk to the women we like, but many times before when we ask these women of today out, when they tell us 'no' and we move on, they'll go tell their friends and say it on social media how much of weirdos and creeps we are just because we asked them out on a date. Typically only happens when it's a guy they're not attracted to, and this woman who commented on my advice is probably one of them.
These kind of women will constantly comment and criticize a man's advise to another man when it comes to dating and meeting women. Not pursuing is a good piece of advice. Men with a lot of dating experience, especially married ones, will tell you this because it doesn't make you look desperate. It doesn't mean NOT to talk to women or even not to ask them out on dates if you're interested in them, but it shows that your time is valuable and you could be doing something else. That's my piece of advice to guys looking to date.
However, this woman twisted what I meant and is trying to say how stupid I am for even mentioning it, as if I'm suggesting apathy. Yes, manning up and start talking to the woman you like is a good piece of advice. However, in today's world, many women are taught diminish and disrespect men they don't find attractive, even if one of those men is a good guy. So men have to be careful of women, like this, today because lies are be told about them. I've been accused of stuff I never did, and I know of other men (some of which are 2 of my brothers and my friends) that have gone through the same thing. It was all because we were not just interested but also came off as looking desperate, even though we weren't.
That's why I and many other men suggest to not pursue. We can be interested in women and ask them out when we feel as if we're more comfortable doing so, but this isn't a one way street. Women would ALSO have to show a level of interest in the guys they like. A guy should take lead in the beginning, but if he thinks as if that the woman he's interested in doesn't feel the same way, he doesn't have to go after her. A lot of times when the attention is taken away from these type of women who are not giving them the time and day, and the man starts talking to other women that are, those women that were uninterested before start showing some interest because they want validation. In other words, it's more about them rather than any potential chemistry, and that's why those type of women play these stupid games. So unless if a woman shows actual level of interest in you, don't pursue. If they do, then go for it, but pull out if you see red flags (bad behavior, selfishness, old relationship talks, etc.).
Last thing, don't take relationship/dating advice nor where to find Christian singles from people, like this woman. She didn't offer anything, and I will bet she's not a godly woman. I don't mean it with disrespect, but the language used here isn't used by women of Christ. She basically repeated what I said, but only called what I said dumb because she wasn't the first to say it. The type of place I told you about where you can meet Christian singles is a good place to find them. And every place I had gone to that either offers dance lessons or just dancing in general, I had found out a lot of these people are Christians and I've known for quite some time. And if ballroom dancing isn't your thing, that's cool. Make sure to get out into the world, though, and don't jump into anything recklessly. Even if you go to a place that I suggested and don't find them, at least you met new people and potentially made new friends.
I apologize to the author of this thread for this comment. But hopefully this paints an example of just because someone proclaims to be a Christian, it doesn't mean they are. Typically, whenever it's a woman and they hear about my experience, they do become jealous because they're not getting the attention they want opposed to other women that are. We've never met in person, but yet this woman is displaying it. Her being condescending and virtue signaling is proving what I suspect to be true. And these other women I'm with in these classes, I'm not pursuing them. I, honestly, am not looking at getting into a relationship, at the moment. But I'm having fun with them whenever we're together, and that's the point of this. Go have fun and enjoy yourself. Don't take the advice of others, like this woman, who only want to tear you down and not give any constructive advice. I really do hope that things go well with the author and finds someone that likes him for him.
In this case, this person comes out of a place ignorance, arrogance, and condescension. She offers nothing but a worldly viewpoint, and brings nothing of value to the table. Yes, we as men should man up and go talk to the women we like, but many times before when we ask these women of today out, when they tell us 'no' and we move on, they'll go tell their friends and say it on social media how much of weirdos and creeps we are just because we asked them out on a date. Typically only happens when it's a guy they're not attracted to, and this woman who commented on my advice is probably one of them.
These kind of women will constantly comment and criticize a man's advise to another man when it comes to dating and meeting women. Not pursuing is a good piece of advice. Men with a lot of dating experience, especially married ones, will tell you this because it doesn't make you look desperate. It doesn't mean NOT to talk to women or even not to ask them out on dates if you're interested in them, but it shows that your time is valuable and you could be doing something else. That's my piece of advice to guys looking to date.
However, this woman twisted what I meant and is trying to say how stupid I am for even mentioning it, as if I'm suggesting apathy. Yes, manning up and start talking to the woman you like is a good piece of advice. However, in today's world, many women are taught diminish and disrespect men they don't find attractive, even if one of those men is a good guy. So men have to be careful of women, like this, today because lies are be told about them. I've been accused of stuff I never did, and I know of other men (some of which are 2 of my brothers and my friends) that have gone through the same thing. It was all because we were not just interested but also came off as looking desperate, even though we weren't.
That's why I and many other men suggest to not pursue. We can be interested in women and ask them out when we feel as if we're more comfortable doing so, but this isn't a one way street. Women would ALSO have to show a level of interest in the guys they like. A guy should take lead in the beginning, but if he thinks as if that the woman he's interested in doesn't feel the same way, he doesn't have to go after her. A lot of times when the attention is taken away from these type of women who are not giving them the time and day, and the man starts talking to other women that are, those women that were uninterested before start showing some interest because they want validation. In other words, it's more about them rather than any potential chemistry, and that's why those type of women play these stupid games. So unless if a woman shows actual level of interest in you, don't pursue. If they do, then go for it, but pull out if you see red flags (bad behavior, selfishness, old relationship talks, etc.).
Last thing, don't take relationship/dating advice nor where to find Christian singles from people, like this woman. She didn't offer anything, and I will bet she's not a godly woman. I don't mean it with disrespect, but the language used here isn't used by women of Christ. She basically repeated what I said, but only called what I said dumb because she wasn't the first to say it. The type of place I told you about where you can meet Christian singles is a good place to find them. And every place I had gone to that either offers dance lessons or just dancing in general, I had found out a lot of these people are Christians and I've known for quite some time. And if ballroom dancing isn't your thing, that's cool. Make sure to get out into the world, though, and don't jump into anything recklessly. Even if you go to a place that I suggested and don't find them, at least you met new people and potentially made new friends.
I apologize to the author of this thread for this comment. But hopefully this paints an example of just because someone proclaims to be a Christian, it doesn't mean they are. Typically, whenever it's a woman and they hear about my experience, they do become jealous because they're not getting the attention they want opposed to other women that are. We've never met in person, but yet this woman is displaying it. Her being condescending and virtue signaling is proving what I suspect to be true. And these other women I'm with in these classes, I'm not pursuing them. I, honestly, am not looking at getting into a relationship, at the moment. But I'm having fun with them whenever we're together, and that's the point of this. Go have fun and enjoy yourself. Don't take the advice of others, like this woman, who only want to tear you down and not give any constructive advice. I really do hope that things go well with the author and finds someone that likes him for him.
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