Hey! Bro...I am curious about this...I have question,please...thanks 🤗...because I could not underatand why God told you to marry a woman but in the end the marriage will just be broken without hope for reconciliation 🤔
Does God reveal to us who we should marry or who we are going to marry? Like this woman ( with complete name and address maybe) is the one you will going to marry...🤔
Hi, Kireina.
I'll attempt to answer your questions, but, before I do, I need to say this:
My own personal experience is NOT the standard for marriage. God's word is the standard, and if anything in my own personal experience doesn't align itself with God's word, then it should be disregarded in favor of God's word.
Now, to your first question...
When it comes to marriage, the first thing that we need to understand is that God designed it to be a natural reflection of the spiritual union between Christ and the church.
We read:
Ephesians chapter 5
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22] Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
[
23] For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
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24] Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
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25] Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
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26] That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
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27] That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
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28] So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
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29] For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
[
30] For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
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31] For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
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32]
This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
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33] Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
In marriage, a husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it. He is also to seek to sanctify and cleanse his wife with the washing of water by the word and to love his wife as his own body, even as Christ does for the church. Similarly, a wife is to reverence her husband as the church reverences Christ.
THIS is what marriage was ordained of God to represent.
With such being the case, let me turn the first question that you asked me around to ask this:
Spiritually speaking, would Christ ever marry a woman, but in the end the marriage would be broken without hope for reconciliation?
Please consider Christ's covenant with the nation of Israel which is likened to a marriage covenant all throughout scripture for the correct answer to this question.
We read:
Jeremiah chapter 3
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1]
They say, If a man put away his wife, and she go from him, and become another man's, shall he return unto her again? shall not that land be greatly polluted? but thou hast played the harlot with many lovers; yet return again to me, saith the LORD.
[
2] Lift up thine eyes unto the high places, and see where thou hast not been lien with. In the ways hast thou sat for them, as the Arabian in the wilderness; and
thou hast polluted the land with thy whoredoms and with thy wickedness.
[
3] Therefore the showers have been withholden, and there hath been no latter rain;
and thou hadst a whore's forehead, thou refusedst to be ashamed.
[
4] Wilt thou not from this time cry unto me, My father, thou art the guide of my youth?
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5] Will he reserve his anger for ever? will he keep it to the end? Behold, thou hast spoken and done evil things as thou couldest.
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6] The LORD said also unto me in the days of Josiah the king, Hast thou seen that which backsliding Israel hath done? she is gone up upon every high mountain and under every green tree,
and there hath played the harlot.
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7]
And I said after she had done all these things, Turn thou unto me. But she returned not. And her treacherous sister Judah saw it.
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8]
And I saw, when for all the causes whereby backsliding Israel committed adultery I had put her away, and given her a bill of divorce; yet her treacherous sister Judah feared not, but went and played the harlot also.
[
9] And it came to pass
through the lightness of her whoredom, that she defiled the land, and committed adultery with stones and with stocks.
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10] And yet for all this her treacherous sister Judah hath not turned unto me with her whole heart, but feignedly, saith the LORD.
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11] And the LORD said unto me, The backsliding Israel hath justified herself more than treacherous Judah.
[
12] Go and proclaim these words toward the north, and say,
Return, thou backsliding Israel, saith the LORD; and I will not cause mine anger to fall upon you: for I am merciful, saith the LORD, and I will not keep anger for ever.
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13]
Only acknowledge thine iniquity, that thou hast transgressed against the LORD thy God, and hast scattered thy ways to the strangers under every green tree, and ye have not obeyed my voice, saith the LORD.
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14]
Turn, O backsliding children, saith the LORD; for I am married unto you: and I will take you one of a city, and two of a family, and I will bring you to Zion:
[
15] And I will give you pastors according to mine heart, which shall feed you with knowledge and understanding.
Here is but one of many places in scripture where Israel is called the LORD's "wife" (vs. 1) or the one that he was "married" (vs. 14) to.
Unfortunately, she (Israel) repeatedly played the "whore" (vss. 2-3, 9) or the "harlot" (vss. 6, 8), and she "refused to be ashamed" (vs. 3) or to "acknowledge her iniquity" (vs. 13), and she therefore never "turned" (vs. 7) or "returned" (vss. 1, 7, 12) to the LORD.
Because of her stubborn refusal to repent, the LORD ultimately "put her away and gave her a bill of divorce" (vs. 8).
In the case of the LORD and Israel, it's NOT that "the marriage was broken without any hope for reconciliation", but rather that Israel refused to do what was necessary in order for there to be reconciliation...and such was the case with my own wife and me.
Ultimately, my ex cheated on me repeatedly (there were many other problems as well), and she refused to either acknowledge that what she was doing was sinful or to repent of the same. In our particular case, I'm NOT the one who "put her away and gave her a bill of divorcement", but she is the one who divorced me.
Could we have been reconciled?
Yes, we could have been, but her own free will choices hindered that from ever happening.
When it comes to the ordinance of marriage, Jesus said:
Mark chapter 10
[
6] But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female.
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7] For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife;
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8] And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh.
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9]
What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
Although God's desire for marriage is that "they are no more twain (two), but one flesh", a man or woman does have the ability, of his or her own free will choice, to put that which God has joined together asunder. It's certainly not God's will, but a man or woman can do so of his or her own free will choice.
This is what happened ultimately in the case of me and my ex. She chose to opt out of what God had joined together.
It's really that simple.
I hope that this answers your first question.
In regard to your second question, I do believe that God will lead us to who he wants us to marry.
For example, the LORD directed Abraham's servant to Rebekah who was to be Isaac's wife. I won't quote it from scripture, but you can read it for yourself in Genesis chapter 24 if you'd like to.
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