I picture this scenario.
Nervously the applicant for the C.C. dating show edges her way onto the stage and sits awkwardly in the wobbly, folding metal chair. "Hello, my name is, well it says it on the form and my name tag, ha ha." There is no response. She clears her throat and begins again. "I guess I'm here to see if there is someone out there who loves the Lord, and has a sense of humour. What? No I don't mean a sense of humour about loving the Lord. Those are two separate things. I mean that this person would have the ability to see the absurd, the miraculous, and the beautiful in life." More silence. She shifts uncomfortably. "What's that? No I don't want to talk politics, or debate theology. Sorry? No, I mean I do love exploring the scripture but rather than try and score points I'd rather talk with God, admire his handiwork by walking in nature. Pardon? Yes politics is important but I'm Canadian. Yes I'm sorry. Why? I don't know, it is just something we do." She tries to block the glare of the lights and see who is sitting in the seats. It is so quiet. She crosses and uncrosses her legs and knocks over her water bottle in the process. She watches it roll along the stage and drop over the edge.
The silence stretches on. "Right. I think maybe I'll go home and bake some strudel shall I?" She gestures to the exit. I'll just see myself out" She retrieves her purse from the floor and tries unsuccessfully to make a dignified exit. Her coat sleeve is stuck in the chair. Rather than stay there and struggle she drags her coat and chair off stage. Sadly, this was one of her better Friday nights.
The end