Are you made for marriage?

[BenFTW]

Do you feel that you were made for marriage? Are you of the right temperament? Do you feel like you are lacking something for marriage or do you feel that you are equipped for marriage?

For myself I feel like I need to accomplish certain things beforehand. If I am being honest before all of you, lately I’ve been feeling destitute. If you look at the definition of destitute it means “lacking the basic necessities for life.” I feel that way lately, about life. I find myself asking, “How do people live this life?” I feel so inadequate.

Beyond certain things that I need to accomplish and have happen though, I do believe God is preparing me and has prepared me for marriage and made me for it. I remember one time my parents speaking of me, and my mother said, “Ben can bring joy into any situation.” I have found oftentimes when people are in disagreement I try to bring laughter into the situation. To bring peace, and simmer things down. I believe this is a good marriage trait, to maintain peace. I always pray to the Lord that in my marriage (to be) that our household is a household of peace, love, and joy.

So, do you find yourself being created for marriage? Do you see traits in yourself that tend to a lasting covenant? Do you see areas that you want the Lord to work on?

I know for me, I know God sanctifies us and with marriage in mind, I pray God sanctifies me and prepares me for a beautiful marriage. I have a song lyric I wrote and it says, “Make me a saint, I want no complaint.” It also says, “Purify me, sanctify me. My heart, my mind, and my emotions in line.” I hope that God is preparing me, and her for each other. I believe He is.

I just thought it might be an interesting thread. Are you made for marriage?

 

[tourist]

I must be since I am on wife #3. There will not be a #4. I'm all set in this regard.

 

[TamLynn]

I think I am.

It's certainly a desire of my heart.🙏🏼

I was married before, so I know I would do some things differently.
I also acknowledge that until we are in a marriage there is only so much we can "prepare" for.
I believe we need to enter into the marriage covenant with the intentions of fighting to preserve it no matter what, and sometimes "no matter what" is messy, hurtful and painful.

It sounds to me like you have a realistic view on marriage and are praying into that accordingly. 🙌🏻

May the Lord give you the desires of your heart. ❤

 

[Scribe]

I don't want to talk about it.

Does that mean I have PTSD?

 

[cinder]

I've long been of the opinion that I would make a great wife, but a rather dull and boring girlfriend. I might be able to manage learning to be my own handyman, but find it a bit more difficult to move large furniture items on my own.

 

[BenFTW]

I think I am.

It's certainly a desire of my heart.🙏🏼

I was married before, so I know I would do some things differently.
I also acknowledge that until we are in a marriage there is only so much we can "prepare" for.
I believe we need to enter into the marriage covenant with the intentions of fighting to preserve it no matter what, and sometimes "no matter what" is messy, hurtful and painful.

It sounds to me like you have a realistic view on marriage and are praying into that accordingly. 🙌🏻

May the Lord give you the desires of your heart. ❤

I think the preparation part is God defining and refining our character and who we are. Of course other more material aspects of life as well, success and independence. But, yes, preparing who we are as a person who walks in love and therefore walks in peace.

God’s word says that “love never fails.” And for that reason love is essential in a lasting covenant. To walk in it, to give it and share in it. “Love is patient, love is kind.” “Love keeps no record of wrongs.” All of these things tend to a lasting covenant.

Thanks for the well-wishes TamLynn❤️

 

[Pipp]

I think If the right person comes along to claim me, that He and I together with help from the Lord could make something lovely work.

 

[Scribe]

I've long been of the opinion that I would make a great wife, but a rather dull and boring girlfriend. I might be able to manage learning to be my own handyman, but find it a bit more difficult to move large furniture items on my own.

I would be of no help, I can't move large furniture items either.

 

[BenFTW]

I don't want to talk about it.

Does that mean I have PTSD?

It sounds like you may be wounded or you’re making a joke. Lol It does take an honest evaluation of yourself, good qualities and things you may need to work on or have God sanctify.

There definitely are traits that make a person fit for marriage, of course the greatest of these ultimately can be summed up in love. Hospitality and consideration for example, are wonderful traits for marriage. Something that will help in tending to the house and meeting the needs (and wants) of others.

 

[Lanolin]

mmm no.
sorry. I was made for God not man and His covenant stands...His blood justifies and has saved me so marriage on top of that isnt necessary.

Maybe He just gave me the ability to do everything and be an all rounder rather than someone who always needs someone, or feels missing if they dont do certain things or has family of their own I dont know.

Its kind of hard to explain to people who think 'oh single female...that must mean she HAS to get married. Cant have a single female, she has to be under a mans thumb and be controlled ' That would just explode someones mind.

I imagine thats how bachelors feel when they are happy being bachelors being free to serve the Lord.
its kinda weird that people think they can only live life once they are married. Ive never thought that way.

But everyone is different. Jesus wouldnt have been able to do his ministry had he married. Just cant picture it. An often if you put all your efforts into working for the Lord your family is going to take second priority.

Just an example. Billy Graham, great preacher, but his sons and daughters hardly ever saw him as he was going round the world evangelising. They were raised by their mum on her own, or with other father figures.

its one thing to get married, its quite another to be a parent and take responsibilty and be a loving mum or loving dad. I think the question is more that rather than simply marriage. and of course you can be a loving mum or dad and not be married. (you could be widowed or divorced) even with divorcees, they still have children to look, after or be responisble for. A marriage could end, but children dont just end cos they have your DNA. those famiily ties can be stronger than marriages. Even when they are adults.

cos you bought them into the world and your children had no choice. its not like they ever said, I can choose my parents and they have to be compatible with me. I can choose what thy look like and what job they have and assume they will always love me. in marriage you have a choice. To say I do and stick with someone no matter what or I dont and not marry at all.

 

[Godsgirl83]

“Love keeps no record of wrongs.”

that's a hard one, but oh so necessary.....

 

[Lanolin]

Large furniture items you just ask someone to help you, dont have to be married to them..
theres also trolleys and forklifts...

Its not a shame to ask for help at times.
also on the other hand think of it from a female point of view. You are the help. Sometimes being the help ALL the time is exhausting.

 

[BenFTW]

I think If the right person comes along to claim me, that He and I together with help from the Lord could make something lovely work.

I like that you emphasized the Lord in your answer. I always hear people quote that a “threefold chord is not easily broken.”

Our amiability and the way we conduct ourselves is dependent upon God, because He sanctifies us. He helps us to walk in love, and He, if we open the doors of our heart, changes us from the inside out.

Good answer emphasizing the Lord.

 

[1christian1]

mmm no.
sorry. I was made for God not man and His covenant stands...His blood justifies and has saved me so marriage on top of that isnt necessary.

Maybe He just gave me the ability to do everything and be an all rounder rather than someone who always needs someone, or feels missing if they dont do certain things or has family of their own I dont know.

Its kind of hard to explain to people who think 'oh single female...that must mean she HAS to get married. Cant have a single female, she has to be under a mans thumb and be controlled ' That would just explode someones mind.

I imagine thats how bachelors feel when they are happy being bachelors being free to serve the Lord.
its kinda weird that people think they can only live life once they are married. Ive never thought that way.

But everyone is different. Jesus wouldnt have been able to do his ministry had he married. Just cant picture it. An often if you put all your efforts into working for the Lord your family is going to take second priority.

Just an example. Billy Graham, great preacher, but his sons and daughters hardly ever saw him as he was going round the world evangelising. They were raised by their mum on her own, or with other father figures.

its one thing to get married, its quite another to be a parent and take responsibilty and be a loving mum or loving dad. I think the question is more that rather than simply marriage. and of course you can be a loving mum or dad and not be married. (you could be widowed or divorced) even with divorcees, they still have children to look, after or be responisble for. A marriage could end, but children dont just end cos they have your DNA. those famiily ties can be stronger than marriages. Even when they are adults.

cos you bought them into the world and your children had no choice. its not like they ever said, I can choose my parents and they have to be compatible with me. I can choose what thy look like and what job they have and assume they will always love me. in marriage you have a choice. To say I do and stick with someone no matter what or I dont and not marry at all.

Good for you Lanolin. It is good for one to know what they want out of life.
But as far as children go. You would think because you have children, you would want to love and care for them.That just does'nt happen. I see it every day. There are too many husband's and wives out there that have no business having children. That's my opinion anyhow...

 

[Lanolin]

generally if you are easy to get along with and tolerant with another person at close quarters marriage should be easy. But if you have a bad temper and violent then you definitely should not consider marriage, since if you marry someone and they dont do as you say you may get angry, cant control your temper and could kill them. people can also threaten and words cant be taken back.

This is quite common more than people think, which is why there is divorce, restraining orders etc.
it amazes me that some men think it ok to beat up their wives. that was a common thing and generally accepted. also if someone drinks they are likely to be violent. They could be the most genial person when sober, but on the bottle, watch out.

Police generally dont do anything if you call them in those situations either. Most wives dont put their own husbands in jail, but I do know of situations like that but police will go, oh its domestic situation you sort it out cos they will generslly be on the mans side and not even hear the woman.

 

[BenFTW]

that's a hard one, but oh so necessary.....

You haven’t observed that one being natural? Have you ever fought with your siblings and it just gets swept under the rug? It’s nothing, you know you still love each other. I find not all wrongs need an apology and some do need to be addressed, especially if amends need to be made. There are times where people just have an understanding, and all is well. Life goes on and “there’s no use crying over spilled milk.”

Sometimes an apology is due for the sake of their peace, so they can feel a release. You may have gotten over it, but it may be festering for them. Reconcile.

I think it’s a bit of a natural phenomenon of love, keeping no record of wrongs. Of course if the offense is greater than casual, it may have to be a decision. “God forgives me, so I ought to also forgive as God for Christ’s sake forgave me.” Kind of goes into the “those who are forgiven much love much.” It can be a strengthening of a relationship. My dad’s best friend is someone who has... pardon my language, screwed him in business multiple times and yet they are best friends. 😅 Thats clearly a God thing.

Over all, I believe it is a truth that love keeps no record of wrongs, and I’ve witnessed it in the lives of others and in the example of siblings.

 

[Gregoryp]

I used to think I wasn't, but the past week or so the Holy Spirit has put it on my heart there is indeed someone on the way. I am actually an introvert and perfectly satisfied being single . But here I am waiting.

 

[Scribe]

I think I was made for naps.

 

[BenFTW]

I used to think I wasn't, but the past week or so the Holy Spirit has put it on my heart there is indeed someone on the way. I am actually an introvert and perfectly satisfied being single . But here I am waiting.

I think there is a strength in being confident in who you are, knowing who you are and being satisfied with yourself as a person. You go into the relationship whole. Since you’re whole, what can you do but give? 😉

It’s also important to receive however, and you might be surprised at how much you appreciate affection. People want acceptance, it’s only natural. You may say you are perfectly content alone, but maybe you’ll be even more satisfied in a relationship? You may have more to offer than you realize.

 

[BenFTW]

I think I was made for naps.

Cuddling is good for marriage too! 😁 lol