Doing your own thing

[Lanolin]

Do you like being told what to do, or do you expect to be asked.
Or are you happy being self-directed, or rather, inspired.

I just dont like people telling me what to do. Im my own boss. Which is why I probably wont make a suitable wife for anybody, and I dont fancy being treated like husband by a man.

Im quite good at supervising and teaching children though, but I do think men just dont seem to like it when women know more than they do. Its not something anyone can help though, cos who wants to be dumb or pretend to be dumb for someone elses ego? I just cant operate that way. Ive got to use the brains God gave me. Although some men just treat women as if they are airheads, but I couldnt really live with someone who insulted my intelligence all the time.

What are your thoughts, does IQ matter? Can you be too smart? Or is it more a 'power' thing. Im happy to do my own thing not someone elses. Unless we are both doing the same thing TOGETHER.

I also think its good people study something as long as they are interested in it. am not someone who looks down on someone whos learning or wants further education. I dont expect anybody to know everything already, no matter what age they are.

reading Genesis, how the serpent got to Eve was he implied she was naive or stupid, and said if she ate this fruit she would be wise. So I think Eve had a slight inferiority complex because the serpent didnt go to Adam. Eve may have felt she lacked wisdom being younger than Adam perhaps. She didnt want to be seen as stupid, which maybe partly why she ate. that the serpent tricked her was his cunning and evil, but God couldnt fault Eve for simply desiring wisdom.

 

[Tinkerbell725]

This thread reminds me of a satire about introverts from the New Yorker.

"Now when people tell me, 'Hey, you’re kind of an a**hole,' I can just smile and respond, 'No, I’m an introvert, and that means I can do whatever I want.'"


https://www.newyorker.com/humor/daily-shouts/im-not-an-asshole-im-an-introvert?


Yes I am an overthinking introvert who wants to be left alone to do my own thing. And a lot of what you said describe introverts. I suspect introversion is a huge factor why most people remain single for a long time. The love solitude so much unlike extroverts who feel like they would die of boredom if they can't see people.

 

[PennEd]

Do you like being told what to do, or do you expect to be asked.
Or are you happy being self-directed, or rather, inspired.

I just dont like people telling me what to do. Im my own boss. Which is why I probably wont make a suitable wife for anybody, and I dont fancy being treated like husband by a man.

Im quite good at supervising and teaching children though, but I do think men just dont seem to like it when women know more than they do. Its not something anyone can help though, cos who wants to be dumb or pretend to be dumb for someone elses ego? I just cant operate that way. Ive got to use the brains God gave me. Although some men just treat women as if they are airheads, but I couldnt really live with someone who insulted my intelligence all the time.

What are your thoughts, does IQ matter? Can you be too smart? Or is it more a 'power' thing. Im happy to do my own thing not someone elses. Unless we are both doing the same thing TOGETHER.

I also think its good people study something as long as they are interested in it. am not someone who looks down on someone whos learning or wants further education. I dont expect anybody to know everything already, no matter what age they are.

reading Genesis, how the serpent got to Eve was he implied she was naive or stupid, and said if she ate this fruit she would be wise. So I think Eve had a slight inferiority complex because the serpent didnt go to Adam. Eve may have felt she lacked wisdom being younger than Adam perhaps. She didnt want to be seen as stupid, which maybe partly why she ate. that the serpent tricked her was his cunning and evil, but God couldnt fault Eve for simply desiring wisdom.

Is this from the Babylon Bee?

Just wow!

 

[Blackbeard]

I don't mind being told what to do or offered constructive criticism by a person with more experience and intelligence. It's taking orders from someone who obviously doesn't deserve to be in their position of power that ticks me off.

 

[Ghoti2]

Wow! That OP post reeks with deluded arrogance. (You really shouldn't brag about your IQ and your intelligence if you are going to publish a post that is littered with so many grammatical errors.)

 

[Dino246]

Do you like being told what to do, or do you expect to be asked.
Or are you happy being self-directed, or rather, inspired.

I just dont like people telling me what to do. Im my own boss. Which is why I probably wont make a suitable wife for anybody, and I dont fancy being treated like husband by a man.

Im quite good at supervising and teaching children though, but I do think men just dont seem to like it when women know more than they do. Its not something anyone can help though, cos who wants to be dumb or pretend to be dumb for someone elses ego? I just cant operate that way. Ive got to use the brains God gave me. Although some men just treat women as if they are airheads, but I couldnt really live with someone who insulted my intelligence all the time.

What are your thoughts, does IQ matter? Can you be too smart? Or is it more a 'power' thing. Im happy to do my own thing not someone elses. Unless we are both doing the same thing TOGETHER.

I also think its good people study something as long as they are interested in it. am not someone who looks down on someone whos learning or wants further education. I dont expect anybody to know everything already, no matter what age they are.

reading Genesis, how the serpent got to Eve was he implied she was naive or stupid, and said if she ate this fruit she would be wise. So I think Eve had a slight inferiority complex because the serpent didnt go to Adam. Eve may have felt she lacked wisdom being younger than Adam perhaps. She didnt want to be seen as stupid, which maybe partly why she ate. that the serpent tricked her was his cunning and evil, but God couldnt fault Eve for simply desiring wisdom.

You are addressing so many distinct issues that it is not clear what you are wanting to discuss.

 

[Lanolin]

This thread reminds me of a satire about introverts from the New Yorker.

"Now when people tell me, 'Hey, you’re kind of an a**hole,' I can just smile and respond, 'No, I’m an introvert, and that means I can do whatever I want.'"


https://www.newyorker.com/humor/daily-shouts/im-not-an-asshole-im-an-introvert?


Yes I am an overthinking introvert who wants to be left alone to do my own thing. And a lot of what you said describe introverts. I suspect introversion is a huge factor why most people remain single for a long time. The love solitude so much unlike extroverts who feel like they would die of boredom if they can't see people.

I love introverts as they can get on with things without needing a lot of direction. and what they come up with is inspiring when they are left to do their own thing i.e they are not copying someone else. I notice many that come into the library for that solitude and hunger to learn.
it doesnt mean they cant be social.

It just means they are less needy for attention than others, and dont need constant distractions or feeding off others.

extroverts can be draining. being bright and bubbly all the time might be ok if your job is to be a receptionist, but if you are a creative person you actually need that solitude to think and pray.

Jesus was definitely an introvert while he had many people around him, he would often go off to pray by himself.

Ive noticed that extroverts really do not understand this and think introverts are being mean just because they need some space and time alone. its quite sad how nasty some people are to introverts though. they cant change and be extroverts its just the way God has made them.

 

[Lanolin]

lol I would rather be a bit overthinking than mindless and underthinking.

many people cannot handle it when someone else THINKS. its easier just to watch tv.
Problems are solved when someone has really sat down and thought about the solution. this does not necesarily mean endless analysis, but just being in the presence of God and allowing Him to speak to you.

When he says my thoughts are not your thoughts, and my ways are not your ways, it means we can present what we know of the situation to God and ask Him to handle it. We dont ignore it. we could please man, but that wont get us anywhere. We need to please God first.

for Christians this means when we do our own thing without God, its not going to work. But many of us living in situations where there are no other christians for guidance and support, ie. in many workplaces, we rely on God and sometimes it will be completely opposite to what the crowd or everyone else is doing.

 

[Deade]

Wow! That OP post reeks with deluded arrogance. (You really shouldn't brag about your IQ and your intelligence if you are going to publish a post that is littered with so many grammatical errors.)

Oh! Come on, lighten up. Let us act like true Christians and encourage each other. We should always encourage everyone to be their very best. When they fall short, as we all have, help them up instead of judging them.

It is okay to overthink but not to over talk. Prov. 17:27,28 "Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent."

 

[Lanolin]

Silence.
A hard concept for many to master.

I can go for days without speaking to anyone and just doing my own thing. I dont need to be talking to someone else to do stuff.

I am not sure how that would work in a marriage if the other person constantly needed my attention. Use sign language? communicate in writing? But thank God that I am not married, cos it would probably be a bit of a disaster. the other person will be saying Lanolin we dont talk anymore.

did we ever talk? lol

 

[cinder]

Well I do remember making the comment to a friend that if I were going to be in a relationship I'd need a guy who was my "intellectual evil" (I meant to say equal, I really did). But if you put any stock in the personality type websites they tend to agree that my personality type is looking more for a mind mate than initial physical or emotional attraction so I probably am normal for my type of weird.

Relationally I think I would find it hard to be with a stereotypical working grunt but even there I think (well I won't say intelligence because that's just rather insulting) mental quickness and the enjoyment of mental puzzles and exercises would be more of an underlying than overt factor in the relationship. Kind of like the person who's most often willing to play games with me is my mother (no I'm not trying to date my mother this is just an example), but we like different games. I like ones where you can build up a strategy or an engine (in gamer talk) and have a bunch of different potential paths to victory. In other words I like the kind of game that I have to play through once to really understand how to play it well. Mom is just as happy with uno or farkle and when it gets too complex to understand the best strategies before you play through the game she stops having fun and is just frustrated and confused. Similarly I think a person who differs from me greatly in the enjoyment of using their mental faculties to figure things out and strategize, will have drastically enough different interests that I wouldn't end it because they are "less intelligent"; I'd end it because they don't like to do the things that I find fun and want to share with them. Actually that' s not the reason I'd end it; that's the reason it would never get started in the first place.

reading Genesis, how the serpent got to Eve was he implied she was naive or stupid, and said if she ate this fruit she would be wise. So I think Eve had a slight inferiority complex because the serpent didnt go to Adam. Eve may have felt she lacked wisdom being younger than Adam perhaps. She didnt want to be seen as stupid, which maybe partly why she ate. that the serpent tricked her was his cunning and evil, but God couldnt fault Eve for simply desiring wisdom.

Seriously? Eve in the perfect pre-fall world fell because she was beset by our modern insecurities that most people would say are effects of the fall and came into being as a result of her decision to eat the fruit. And God very much faulted both Adam and Eve for their blatant disobedience (and desiring wisdom might not have been bad, but attempting to gain wisdom apart from the God they owed their lives to certainly was). Is your Bible missing Genesis 3?

 

[Dino246]

lol I would rather be a bit overthinking than mindless and underthinking.

many people cannot handle it when someone else THINKS. its easier just to watch tv.
Problems are solved when someone has really sat down and thought about the solution. this does not necesarily mean endless analysis, but just being in the presence of God and allowing Him to speak to you.

If this is a backhanded response to my post, it's lame and blame-shifting at the same time.

Thinking about a multitude of loosely-related subjects all at once is not "overthinking"; rather, it is being scatterbrained.

Someone else truly thinking doesn't bother me in the least, nor does it bother anyone else that I know. Someone else spewing incoherent thoughts and expecting others to follow and engage them intelligently does bother me.

So, once again, what exactly would you like to address in this thread?

 

[Lanolin]

Well I do remember making the comment to a friend that if I were going to be in a relationship I'd need a guy who was my "intellectual evil" (I meant to say equal, I really did). But if you put any stock in the personality type websites they tend to agree that my personality type is looking more for a mind mate than initial physical or emotional attraction so I probably am normal for my type of weird.

Relationally I think I would find it hard to be with a stereotypical working grunt but even there I think (well I won't say intelligence because that's just rather insulting) mental quickness and the enjoyment of mental puzzles and exercises would be more of an underlying than overt factor in the relationship. Kind of like the person who's most often willing to play games with me is my mother (no I'm not trying to date my mother this is just an example), but we like different games. I like ones where you can build up a strategy or an engine (in gamer talk) and have a bunch of different potential paths to victory. In other words I like the kind of game that I have to play through once to really understand how to play it well. Mom is just as happy with uno or farkle and when it gets too complex to understand the best strategies before you play through the game she stops having fun and is just frustrated and confused. Similarly I think a person who differs from me greatly in the enjoyment of using their mental faculties to figure things out and strategize, will have drastically enough different interests that I wouldn't end it because they are "less intelligent"; I'd end it because they don't like to do the things that I find fun and want to share with them. Actually that' s not the reason I'd end it; that's the reason it would never get started in the first place.




Seriously? Eve in the perfect pre-fall world fell because she was beset by our modern insecurities that most people would say are effects of the fall and came into being as a result of her decision to eat the fruit. And God very much faulted both Adam and Eve for their blatant disobedience (and desiring wisdom might not have been bad, but attempting to gain wisdom apart from the God they owed their lives to certainly was). Is your Bible missing Genesis 3?

no, remember eve was made after adam. God spoke to Adam first, and Eve heard from .adam second hand. she didnt yet exist. He just was older than her, by a couple of hours (if they were created on the same day) after he had named all the animals and was given the warning.

check out Geneisis 3:6 and also, God punished Adam for disobedience, but Eve just got the consequences of what she did, which was to fall pregant so her childbirth would be painful. note that the commandment about the tree was given to Adam, not Eve. You read the Bible and you will see, am not making stuff up here!

 

[Mii]

Do you like being told what to do, or do you expect to be asked.
Or are you happy being self-directed, or rather, inspired.

I just dont like people telling me what to do. Im my own boss. Which is why I probably wont make a suitable wife for anybody, and I

I don't either, if you ask me you will achieve better results.

Can't understand why this would make you unsuited toward marriage though. There are plenty of bossy females and by the same logic I would be unsuited to marriage if I were unable to be bossed around.

It could be rare but I see partnerships that are more about mutual agreement than anything else. My ideal convenanted relationship is more or less two seperate agents that agree to unify, while still recognizing their own autonomy (subject to the Lord).

I may still enjoy my alone time, and she may enjoy hers. The only contractual demand is laid out in scripture and that is so that temptations are lessened. It's not so much those particular temptations personally, just excess energy creating wasteful enterprises that could be better spent on worship.

But a strong woman looks like the Proverbs 31 woman, and MANY men would have issues with that in today's world but there are plenty, I'm sure, that would consider that quite the prize.

 

[Lanolin]

it seems like the Proverbs 31 was the boss of her own domain. She was in charge of so many things and it seems she did then on her own while her husband took care other business? It doesnt say what he does though, shes so busy and it doesnt seem like they actually have time to do much together!

that could work out like you are together for maybe six months of the year and then you get to do your own thing for the other six months. Maybe he is the silent funder of all her enterprises I dont know. This is way back in OT times its quite different today.

surely not the only thing keeping a marriage together is children. Some couples dont have any and they stay together but it seems the ones that have them tend to split up. I speak to some split parents and they dont know where there children even are half the time.

 

[Lanolin]

Give her the fruit of her hands, and let her OWN works praise her in the gates. Proverbs 31:31
emphasis mine.

Go proverbs 31 lady! She just does stuff and doesnt need anyone bossing her around. Men take note.

 

[G00WZ]

I pretty much do my own thing regardless, however i am not beyond instruction. As for pretending to be dumb for the sake of someone else's ego, sometimes it is a wise move, especially with people of authority who might be on a power trip.

 

[EleventhHour]

@Lightskin I am here looking for fun!

Ive got to use the brains God gave me.

Yes me too....that is why I always wear helmet when I bike, skate, ski or any other activity where a brain injury may occur.

Since you are so smart I am wondering should I wear a helmet when I drive too?

Lots of brain injuries behind the wheel you know....also I have a set of stairs in my home maybe I should wear the helmet then too..since falls are the second leading cause of brain injury.

What a quandry really.... so much time and effort..... I hope God appreciates it!!

 

[Going_Nowhere]

I'll say this:

When people try to tell me how to live my life, that always irritates and annoys me. Specifically, when they tell me I need to come out of my shell and be more social. No thank you, I'd rather not. My reclusive lifestyle works for me and I'm not going to change that because one or more people say I should.

 

[BrotherMike]

To answer the OP's questions...

I'm an ISFP and I don't like being told what to do, nor do I like being in control of others. I enjoy independence. I don't mind input of others if I see they want my best interest at heart, but I usually will do my own thing (especially being single). This does change if I ever get married again... then it's about us. I wouldn't want to marry someone who wears the pants, nor would I want someone who wants to be totally submissive and indecisive as I like doing things she would want to do.

I think generally men don't mind if the woman knows more in subjects than they do...the bigger picture is when someone flaunts it. As long as humility is shown, I wouldn't care. I think both men and women could treat anyone as airheads... just to calm the male bashing down a bit

IQ doesn't matter, kindness matters. God created us all beautiful, until we make choices that doesn't make us beautiful . I choose to hang around those that show the fruits of the spirit. It doesn't hurt to learn or grow instead of staying content in our knowledge.