You didn't break it down yet
I'm so sorry, I started it then got pulled away on a 3 day weekend that the Lord kept me busy. I never forgot though.
Here are some of the points I was thinking of when I made the original comment,
You didn't break it down yet
I wanted to go back through to point out some of the things you said spot on that lead me to say what I did about you. I didn’t go all the way back, but in comment
#159
“Like you had doubts about free will/losing salvation... I have also had my own doubts. And yes... am pretty much stuck in the hows/whys... Rather than acting out anything. You said... One side has a too high a view of men. I hope i haven't portrayed myself as such a one in my discussions... Because i have come to a point wherein i feel terrible about myself and my nature... so handicapped by my sinful nature.”
Me- The fact you see “your” nature this way is truth, outside of Christ, but there is a danger from the other direction, and letting the guilt of sin your struggling with paralyze you from still proclaiming truth. This is a very ha4rd thing to do, to0 actually go to Him when you know you’ve disobeyed Him. But we still must, there is nowhere else to go, and this is also how He molds us more into His image. The fact that these things bother you so, in my opinion anyway, point to Him already having changed you. We don’t feel so much guilt when we are in the flesh, we have to many ways to justify anything we do, and it’s just so awesome embracing the sin.
In #196 you say
“I have to agree upon the guilt feeling.. Its a huge burden of guilt... like as though millions are slipping through our hands while we still struggle to understand this whole thing... And every passing day.. brings guilt.... every single death... the statistical analysis of the rate of death, no. of deaths.... it makes everything look hopeless.”
Me- This is 100% true….Before Jesus. He is that hope, and He had V-I-C-T-O-R-Y, the hope is there calling, that is why He transforms use and tells us to “go and make disciples of ALL nations”, This is the bigger picture, this is “the” Way, “the” ONLY Way, Jesus Christ, and we are the means by which he brings everything under and into Himself, as we were created to be. BTW I absolutely love your view and understanding of death and the gravity of the situation.
In comment #202 You literally cant get any closer to the “main point” of all reality than this-
“Yeah. The just shall live by faith. I know that there ain't any good in me... And any good flows through me only by leaning on Him... havin faith. Trying myself to be good without faith had made me stumble and broke me... i can't do anything without Him. I mean... I need Him. He is Love.”
Me- This is the
whole point sister, and frankly I think it’s nothing short of amazing, and I praise God that you see things this clearly sister. I praise God in Jesus name for showing us these truths, and the futility of focusing on any wickedness out here instead of having it pinpointed on our glorious Creator, this is tragically our nature outside of Him, and I praise God He showed me “my way” for what it truly was. Nothing.
In #208
“But its comforting... If i dont have to feel guilty...2 of my batchmates, one a Hindu, another a Muslim died in a bike crash. I felt an urgency within me then... about people's eternity... people can leave at any moment.. I felt a pressure within me... My life must reflect Christ in me i thought but.. I looked at how miserable i was... I mean... more than focusing on studies.. My mind drifted upon the next person who would die without the gospel. Got me more concerned about eternity than the present moment and this life... and my studies... Like i wanted to throw this burden at God Himself... I cannot handle it. And now am trying to trust Him with this... This huge thing... Am trying to rely on Him... And thats where am struggling within. Am unable to give this burden to God.. Unable to trust that He would handle this wisely... Because of a lot of Scriptural doubts... I know its wrong but am trying to tell Him that i don't agree with His plan... of the elect... I know am not better than Him... but still at times i doubt His love when i see Him selecting some people...am trying to search out His heart behind this. Am trying to make sure He isn't playing a joke on humanity and laughing backstage. If He is doing that... Then let Him tell me that... I also will laugh at my own misery.”
Me- Oh my goodness, I just can’t help but see God is going to use you powerfully. I really don’t want this to just be a “catch phrase”, I also want to share some idea of how He is working this in my life. At the start , in my experience, and usually how everyone I’ve talked to testifies that starting out I had no clue what I was doing, I just knew God was real and I wanted to tell people. I also learned that the fastest way to clear a room of the lost is to start talking about Jesus, that said where better to share the truth than a place where they literally can not leave 8^D , anyway this is where God put me and I started sharing Jesus. At first when I went up there some times I’d get 2 request for “one on ones” and they’d both refuse when called, now by His power I can’t go up there without 5 or 6 request for me specifically. Bigger than that (which is ALL Him BTW, this is His power and glory) after about 2 years of doing it, I can actually see God at work in them, bringing them to life. It’s is amazing, and He starts small, but you just know that we have to separate the things of this world from God’s love. God does not sit laughing at anyone, God loved the world like this, He gave is ONLY Son to be the perfect sacrifice and to take the punishment of Gods righteous wrath for all who come to Him. The wickedness of man, and the injustice of this world will be judged, we can trust in our God on that, but look at all He did so that we might be reconciled, He gave us a way out of the hopelessness.
Then in # 607 you said
“I don't want to point fingers but a Church is supposed to be run by the Head who is Christ... Isn't it. Why would the Head want me to be left out. I try looking for Him.. But in a certain Church His love was apparent... just by the way a man greeted and hugged everybody with love in his eyes at the entrance. If God ain't present inside a Church... If the pastor is the head... I sense deep pain, and anger. Where is the Father? He knows every member individually and loves each one. Without His presence, it is like a boring party and a feeling that i don't belong.”
Me- I believe you’re spot on here, and this is something He is really only just opening my eyes to the importance and gravity of this concept of “togetherness’ 5 year into my walk. This kind of insight is truth, and I think you’re spot on and believe that only God opens our eyes to truth like this.
I just think you are so active in the way you think, in the questions you ask, and the points you make. I would just like to encourage you by saying that I hear our Shepard’s voice in the things you say and the way you come at them. I truly believe that God has a plan for all of us, but will be using you to proclaim His truth and power in amazing ways.
These are just a few examples of what I’m talking about, but it’s not the specific words, it’s the overall spirit you put out, and this is why I said what I did. I pray God continue to draw you closer everyday deepening your understanding of His glorious truth. I also pray He show you the truth of crippling guilt and the burden it puts on you. Jesus doesn’t chain us at all, He breaks chains. I pray you banish all that keeps the truth from being proclaimed from her mind and heart especially this false guilt. Let her see the beauty of your plan in peace, because in you there is a peace this world cannot offer and in this woman I hear a love for you, a desire for righteousness, to not only proclaim Your Name in words, but to go out and show it in deeds, in the world, in love, right now here today!!! May His kingdom come, may His will be done ON EARTH as it is in heaven, and I pray this all in KING Jesus mighty Name. Amen
