Hey Everyone,
It's been several years since I've been on dating sites, but I know one thing they all have in common is the enormous deluge of other profiles that make you feel like you have to make yourself sound "interesting" enough to talk to. Now of course, pictures are usually what get the most attention, but aside from that, what would grab your interest when reading a profile or PM?
I know one thing that I used to pass by were profiles that seemed to say, "Here I am, here's what I want, here's what you can do for me, and here's how I expect you to fulfill my never-endng list of specific needs and wants." This inspired me to try to include at least a few things in my dating profile that I thought I could offer another person, as well as saying that, "Knowing that God calls a wife to be a helpmate, I am looking for the one I would be happy serving for the rest of my life." And of course, I was looking for someone who would be happy with mutually serving and giving to someone else, rather than just taking.
As far as PM's went, I had some things in my profile that were seen as highly undesirable (the fact that I was divorced, for example) and cut way down on the number of contacts I received, which I understood. However, if I did receive a reply, I have to confess that I was always a bit disheartened by cookie cutter PM's that were obviously cut, pasted, and sent out to hundreds of other candidates as well. I never used to answer those, but then I read several posts by men who expressed their frustration at the fact that they might send out 200 hundred messages and never even receive a single reply. I guess I have mixed feelings about that, because on one hand, who has time to write 200 hand-crafted, individualized messages, but on the other hand, who wants to feel like fish caught in a dragnet that's been hauled across the bottom of an ocean of other profiles?
But, I can definitely understand these feelings of discouragement, and would now go more by the person's profile rather than an initial generic PM.
How about the rest of you? What stands out to you when you read a profile or PM?
It doesn't have to be on a dating site, either--it could just as easily be here on good old CC or any other site.
* In a sea of other profiles, what would make a particular profile stand out and convince you to get to know the author a little better?
* With so many thousands of other members to choose to get to know, what would you put in your profile that you believe might stand out, even if it's just to meet new friends here on CC?
It's been several years since I've been on dating sites, but I know one thing they all have in common is the enormous deluge of other profiles that make you feel like you have to make yourself sound "interesting" enough to talk to. Now of course, pictures are usually what get the most attention, but aside from that, what would grab your interest when reading a profile or PM?
I know one thing that I used to pass by were profiles that seemed to say, "Here I am, here's what I want, here's what you can do for me, and here's how I expect you to fulfill my never-endng list of specific needs and wants." This inspired me to try to include at least a few things in my dating profile that I thought I could offer another person, as well as saying that, "Knowing that God calls a wife to be a helpmate, I am looking for the one I would be happy serving for the rest of my life." And of course, I was looking for someone who would be happy with mutually serving and giving to someone else, rather than just taking.
As far as PM's went, I had some things in my profile that were seen as highly undesirable (the fact that I was divorced, for example) and cut way down on the number of contacts I received, which I understood. However, if I did receive a reply, I have to confess that I was always a bit disheartened by cookie cutter PM's that were obviously cut, pasted, and sent out to hundreds of other candidates as well. I never used to answer those, but then I read several posts by men who expressed their frustration at the fact that they might send out 200 hundred messages and never even receive a single reply. I guess I have mixed feelings about that, because on one hand, who has time to write 200 hand-crafted, individualized messages, but on the other hand, who wants to feel like fish caught in a dragnet that's been hauled across the bottom of an ocean of other profiles?
But, I can definitely understand these feelings of discouragement, and would now go more by the person's profile rather than an initial generic PM.
How about the rest of you? What stands out to you when you read a profile or PM?
It doesn't have to be on a dating site, either--it could just as easily be here on good old CC or any other site.
* In a sea of other profiles, what would make a particular profile stand out and convince you to get to know the author a little better?
* With so many thousands of other members to choose to get to know, what would you put in your profile that you believe might stand out, even if it's just to meet new friends here on CC?
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