Hey Everyone,
A recent conversation had me thinking about how often single people give or receive any kind of physical affection. I think most everyone has read articles in which it's been documented that some babies who were given life necessities but no physical affection or care have perished, and I often wonder what kind of effect a lack of contact has on people as adults.
Why is it assumed that a lack of affection is just a natural occurrence as people get older?
Of course, as Christians, sexual contact is not an option for us singles until we get married, but what about more innocent things such as holding someone's hand (a friend or relative), a warm (but not overly long or suspiciously creepy) hug, and an affectionate kiss on the cheek (such as between friends or relatives)?
I admit to being a fairly affectionate person, and lack of an outlet for even the most innocent forms of affection has me feeling at a loss.
I consider myself very fortunate to have grown up in a family in which, even though I'm an adult, my parents smother me with hugs and/or verbal affirmations, and I can feel the perk in my soul just from being around that exchange for even just a few moments. The only hugs I receive these days are from my parents, but unfortunately, I don't get to see them nearly as much as I would like.
What about the rest of you? If you'll give me a few moments, I'm going to create an anonymous, multiple-choice poll that will reflect this threads original question.
However, some of the topics that won't be adequately covered by the poll are:
* Who do you exchange these affections with? (Parents, children, church members, etc.)
* Perhaps you don't feel comfortable with any kind of affection at all? Why? (If you would feel comfortable sharing.) And if you're not comfortable with affection, what kind of effect do you think that will have on a future marriage?
* Who were your role models in showing affection, and do you strive to be more or less like them? (For example, if you had parents who hugged you often, do you aspire to be like them? Or if you had parents who never hugged you or each other in front of others, do you plan to be the same way in your own marriage and family?)
Remember, the poll is anonymous, so no one can see your answers, as well as multiple choice, so feel free to choose as many as you feel apply.
I am hoping, however, that the poll will not be seen as a substitute for an actual discussion and am hoping that people will feel free to share their thoughts, opinions, and experiences.
Married people are welcome to answer as well--was it liberating or challenging to to from being single, to being around someone--and trying to show them affection, all the time?
We singles appreciate our married friends here who teach us the realities of married life without talking down to us.
I'll be looking forward to your answers.
A recent conversation had me thinking about how often single people give or receive any kind of physical affection. I think most everyone has read articles in which it's been documented that some babies who were given life necessities but no physical affection or care have perished, and I often wonder what kind of effect a lack of contact has on people as adults.
Why is it assumed that a lack of affection is just a natural occurrence as people get older?
Of course, as Christians, sexual contact is not an option for us singles until we get married, but what about more innocent things such as holding someone's hand (a friend or relative), a warm (but not overly long or suspiciously creepy) hug, and an affectionate kiss on the cheek (such as between friends or relatives)?
I admit to being a fairly affectionate person, and lack of an outlet for even the most innocent forms of affection has me feeling at a loss.
I consider myself very fortunate to have grown up in a family in which, even though I'm an adult, my parents smother me with hugs and/or verbal affirmations, and I can feel the perk in my soul just from being around that exchange for even just a few moments. The only hugs I receive these days are from my parents, but unfortunately, I don't get to see them nearly as much as I would like.
What about the rest of you? If you'll give me a few moments, I'm going to create an anonymous, multiple-choice poll that will reflect this threads original question.
However, some of the topics that won't be adequately covered by the poll are:
* Who do you exchange these affections with? (Parents, children, church members, etc.)
* Perhaps you don't feel comfortable with any kind of affection at all? Why? (If you would feel comfortable sharing.) And if you're not comfortable with affection, what kind of effect do you think that will have on a future marriage?
* Who were your role models in showing affection, and do you strive to be more or less like them? (For example, if you had parents who hugged you often, do you aspire to be like them? Or if you had parents who never hugged you or each other in front of others, do you plan to be the same way in your own marriage and family?)
Remember, the poll is anonymous, so no one can see your answers, as well as multiple choice, so feel free to choose as many as you feel apply.
I am hoping, however, that the poll will not be seen as a substitute for an actual discussion and am hoping that people will feel free to share their thoughts, opinions, and experiences.
Married people are welcome to answer as well--was it liberating or challenging to to from being single, to being around someone--and trying to show them affection, all the time?
We singles appreciate our married friends here who teach us the realities of married life without talking down to us.
I'll be looking forward to your answers.
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