If you’re planning to go on a date with someone special, who should pay for it?

[Mel85]

Scenario: you are going on a date with someone that you are very interested and invested in. You’ve known them for a while now, say 2-3 months, and you both finally agree to go on this special date.

In terms of expenses (travel, food, venue, etc) who should pay for the date? Her? Him? Both?

Myth: there’s always been that myth that ‘men should pay’ as it’s a gentlemen’s approach or tradition. Do you agree?

Real life experiences: feel free to share any real life experiences that you’ve had in this area that might be of good advice for those who haven’t experienced this area yet.

Overall, I’m interested to see some answers and/or experiences.

 

[Demi777]

Depends on the culture.
I would say best is to prepare to pay your own part amd let him habe hos space to, make his decision if he wantedwas to cover them himself

 

[Lynx]

wots a date?

 

[Lynx]

IF THIS IS THE FIRST DATE: If you asked him out, you pay. If he asked you out, he pays. It wouldn't be fair to ask somebody out on a date and then expect the person you asked out to pay for it.

Anything after the first date, it gets a lot more complicated.

DISCLAIMER: This post is made by a guy who has never been on a date, so what do I know?

 

[BruceWayne]

I would also say that the one who asks should probably pay. If it's casual, maybe you split it. The one being asked out shouldn't be paying for it on their own.

 

[Tommy379]

The man pays. That's what men do. Be a man.

 

[toinena]

The person taking the initiative pays. If it is so that the person has travelled from afar it would be right for the person that is local pays. If one of the parties is under heavy financial stress, the person that is more well off pays.

In the ideal world, a local guy in his 20s asks a local girl in her early 20s out, he being ready to take the financial commitment of dating, he should pay. But life is more complicated than that. If two are already friends and the date is somewhat unclear if it is between friends or having romantic inclinations, it would be normal to share the bill.

 

[Tommy379]

Quit making this complicated. Men pay.

 

[melita916]

My husband paid for the first dates. After we were officially a couple, we took turns paying. Usually, if he travelled to my city, I paid, and vice versa. If we met in the middle, we took turns.

 

[Sweetmorningdew78]

For me, if you want to make a good impression please pay for our date it is not because I can't pay for myself or for both of us...but because it is a gentleman's act. It is a biggest turn off for me if the man will ask me to split the bill...for sure I will share or even pay for the meal but sorry there will be no next time.




When me and my ex travelled we shared... He told me that he will goin to pay and didn't want me to share. He paid for the plane tickets,and accommodations...but I paid for our food and other expenses like travel guides,bus,boats etc) but most of the time he ended up paying for our meals He insisted always. I reciprocated his chivalry by giving him things like souvenirs etc. and taking care of his things For me it is not about money...not about how much money you are willing to spend...Our dates doesn't have to be expensive (you can take me out to eat street food I would love it yayy 😍 ) ...but how you made me feel special

 

[Sweetmorningdew78]

For me, if you want to make a good impression please pay for our date it is not because I can't pay for myself or for both of us...but because it is a gentleman's act. It is a biggest turn off for me if the man will ask me to split the bill...for sure I will share or even pay for the meal but sorry there will be no next time.




When me and my ex travelled we shared... He told me that he will goin to pay and didn't want me to share. He paid for the plane tickets,and accommodations...but I paid for our food and other expenses like travel guides,bus,boats etc) but most of the time he ended up paying for our meals He insisted always. I reciprocated his chivalry by giving him things like souvenirs etc. and taking care of his things For me it is not about money...not about how much money you are willing to spend...Our dates doesn't have to be expensive (you can take me out to eat street food I would love it yayy 😍 ) ...but how you made me feel special



But of course it depends on the situation I can always pay or share with him
like How long we are together, our financial situation at the moment etc... I'll be happy always to give more...

 

[Tommy379]

For me, if you want to make a good impression please pay for our date it is not because I can't pay for myself or for both of us...but because it is a gentleman's act. It is a biggest turn off for me if the man will ask me to split the bill...for sure I will share or even pay for the meal but sorry there will be no next time.




When me and my ex travelled we shared... He told me that he will goin to pay and didn't want me to share. He paid for the plane tickets,and accommodations...but I paid for our food and other expenses like travel guides,bus,boats etc) but most of the time he ended up paying for our meals He insisted always. I reciprocated his chivalry by giving him things like souvenirs etc. and taking care of his things For me it is not about money...not about how much money you are willing to spend...Our dates doesn't have to be expensive (you can take me out to eat street food I would love it yayy 😍 ) ...but how you made me feel special

If we are ever on the same side of the planet, dinner is on me.

 

[toinena]

Quit making this complicated. Men pay.

I haven't seen any of those around here.

 

[Tommy379]

I haven't seen any of those around here.

I pay. I always pay. One way or another, I pay.

 

[Jennie-Mae]

The man pays. It’s so great being treated like that on a date. He’s holding the door, pulling out the chair, and paying...makes at least me feel like a lady❤️.

 

[toinena]

The man pays. It’s so great being treated like that on a date. He’s holding the door, pulling out the chair, and paying...makes at least me feel like a lady❤️.

Did you marry a Norwegian? He doesn't sound like one.

 

[Jennie-Mae]

I pay. I always pay. One way or another, I pay.

Did you marry a Norwegian? He doesn't sound like one.

He’s a real gentleman. He’s probably learned that in Mobile whenever he’s was living there way before we met. Like you probably done figured, he’s a bit older than me😊.

 

[melita916]

My husband is from north USA. He’s a gentleman. He was taught well

 

[Miri]

wots a date?

😉

 

[Pipp]

I'd say establish what kind of date you're going on before you go. If I were planning to pay I'd just say.. "would you like to go to ________ ? This one's on me."