How to know when it's Really official?

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ManiaStar

Senior Member
Nov 14, 2015
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#1
talking about dating. How do you know when it's truly official even if no words are spoken btwn the 2?

what would you say are the hints or something?

I really don't want to give more details at the moment but just curious as to your thoughts.

I know probably not the best forum to ask this question but.... just need to know.
 
Jan 24, 2009
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#2
talking about dating. How do you know when it's truly official even if no words are spoken btwn the 2?

what would you say are the hints or something?

I really don't want to give more details at the moment but just curious as to your thoughts.

I know probably not the best forum to ask this question but.... just need to know.
I don't know your situation, of course, but it's my view that the guy should make it official!

Every time I have started dating, I made it official.

In my case, each time I have given the woman a necklace(mizpah) and made it clear that I was pursuing her exclusively.

Under ordinary circumstances, anything less than making a vocal proclamation is, in my mind, playing games.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#3
Well, if you're not willing to give details it's not reasonable to expect answers.
But generally speaking if you haven't discussed anything then it's not official. That's what official would indicate, that two people made a mutual decision, together. As in talked about it. Though if the situation is as such that you are unable to bring it up, then it's probably not a good situation to be in to begin with. If there's a breakdown in communication now then you are doomed unless that changes.
 

ManiaStar

Senior Member
Nov 14, 2015
381
29
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#4
Well, if you're not willing to give details it's not reasonable to expect answers.
But generally speaking if you haven't discussed anything then it's not official. That's what official would indicate, that two people made a mutual decision, together. As in talked about it. Though if the situation is as such that you are unable to bring it up, then it's probably not a good situation to be in to begin with. If there's a breakdown in communication now then you are doomed unless that changes.
.

Honestly, I'm afraid to bring the topic up w/ him. I just have fear. But, I will share that he and I started kissing about 6 months ago and had been getting much closer/cuddling and kissing a lot. Nothing has been mentioned as to what we're doing really but, I am curious.

I guess instead of it being official, then, what would the signs be that you would be more then just friends?
 
Aug 16, 2016
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#7
If no words are spoken between the two it's only speculation regardless of the hints you may receive. You may even take hints to mean more than they actually are if you solely rely on that. It's best for the two to have a discussion pertaining to if they are just friends or a couple. It's the only way to make anything truly official.
 
Jan 24, 2009
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#10
.

Honestly, I'm afraid to bring the topic up w/ him. I just have fear. But, I will share that he and I started kissing about 6 months ago and had been getting much closer/cuddling and kissing a lot. Nothing has been mentioned as to what we're doing really but, I am curious.

I guess instead of it being official, then, what would the signs be that you would be more then just friends?
Kissing in a relationship that is not officially dating?

You're afraid to bring up the topic with him?

He won't commit?

This could potentially go down the path of a friendship with "benefits". Blah.

I sure hope your situation improves in a hurry, or it ends abruptly.
 
Jan 24, 2009
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#11
What if you don't have a Facebook page to update??
Good point!

I, for example, don't have a buttface page. :eek:

Oh wait...I made a vocal commitment to my girlfriend...I don't need a facebutt page. :eek:
 

ManiaStar

Senior Member
Nov 14, 2015
381
29
28
#12
If no words spoken between the two it's only speculation regardless of the hints you may receive. You may even take hints to mean more than they actually are if you solely rely on that. It's best for the two to have a discussion pertaining to if they are just friends or a couple. It's the only way to may anything truly official.
I have never been in a relationship before so, this is all brand new to me. I keep hoping he'll bring the topic up but it's not happening and I'm really nervous to bring the topic up bc I'm afraid of what his answer will be but, since we've been kissing and cuddling for 6 months now, to me it seems like we're dating, It's so confusing to me.
 

ManiaStar

Senior Member
Nov 14, 2015
381
29
28
#15
Kissing in a relationship that is not officially dating?

You're afraid to bring up the topic with him?

He won't commit?

This could potentially go down the path of a friendship with "benefits". Blah.

I sure hope your situation improves in a hurry, or it ends abruptly.


In the past, when he was in other relationships, he and i never did any of that even tho we mutually liked each other. Then after his last relationship ended, a little after that, we started doing what we're doing now and he often talks to me about the future and having kids w/ me, etc.
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
14,554
2,176
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#16
You're kissing this guy and you don't know....

STOP kissing him it will only lead to the bedroom...that's more of a relationship than you want to raise.... as in children.... it's tough being a single mom... I can tell you from experience...
 
Jan 24, 2009
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#17
I have never been in a relationship before so, this is all brand new to me. I keep hoping he'll bring the topic up but it's not happening and I'm really nervous to bring the topic up bc I'm afraid of what his answer will be but, since we've been kissing and cuddling for 6 months now, to me it seems like we're dating, It's so confusing to me.
I'm afraid of what his answer will be Better to know his intent than to get emotionally hurt. Perhaps he's a rookie at this too...but he can still be more vocal about his intent...for the sake of both himself and you.
 

ManiaStar

Senior Member
Nov 14, 2015
381
29
28
#18
Ahhhh, but you're asking us how to know it's official.

Checked his buttface page lately? :p

I know a few people who have been married for years and they've never updated their facebook status as to married and still says single. Not everyone updates their facebook status to what they're dating/marriage life is. I even know others who are dating who don't have their facebook status updated as to saying dating. A Lot of people Don't do that.
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
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Philippines Age 40
#19
I never would update my facebook status anyway. That doesn't make it official.
I was just kidding. It's official when you have declared your undying love for each other and would never cheat on each other. You have to make things clear. Why don't you just ask him? Assumptions only lead to confusion and misunderstandings that lead to heartbreaks.
 
Jan 24, 2009
1,601
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#20
In the past, when he was in other relationships, he and i never did any of that even tho we mutually liked each other. Then after his last relationship ended, a little after that, we started doing what we're doing now and he often talks to me about the future and having kids w/ me, etc.
we mutually liked each other What does "like" mean?