Being Ridiculed for my virginity

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cmarieh

Guest
#1
I get really frustrated when people question my personal values when they have no room to talk themselves. My sister is sexually active with her fiancé and she was ridiculing me for maintaining my innocence until I am married. I believe my virginity is the greatest gift I can give my future husband on my wedding night. I guess the reason I got so frustrated is because the person who did that is my sister and we both were raised not to question values that we feel strongly about. I don't know what to do. Help?
 
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Nuns_n_roses

Guest
#2
Honestly, I know it's easier said than done but you just can't let her words get to you. You're standing by your beliefs and it's not about impressing our friends and family, it's about doing what we believe to be right. :)
 
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letti

Guest
#3
Don't let what she is saying bother you.You are doing what GOD wants.God is in favor of your choice.
 
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Bryancampbell

Guest
#4
Sounds to me you're in the right path with sexual activity. That's beautiful that you still kept it for the future husband, most people cannot say the same. Don't listen to your critics, listen to your Creator. Peace be with you! :)
 
Jul 13, 2013
44
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#5
My sister does the same thing, I started to take her comments as a joke rather words to pull me down :)
 
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Witness45

Guest
#6
This kind of thing just infuriates me. I made the dumb choice of sacrificing my virginity to someone who betrayed me and destroyed my life... Now I'll never be able to give it to the one... I feel so disgusting and dirty about it, I was so dumb.

Don't you dare listen to your sister! Be proud of what you have and what you stand for! You don't realize how precious it is until it's gone, and once it's gone, you can't get it back. You're tainted for life... Just ask me. The idiot who gave it up for a non-believing cheater...
 
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Ugly

Guest
#7
I suggest not worrying so much about what your sister says and does. Just being raised in the same environment and with the same values doesn't mean you're going to grow up agreeing with them. People have different personalities. You can just make a generalization about all people like that. Some people grow up in poor neighborhoods and get into drugs and gangs and whatnot. Others will rise out of their poverty, avoid the drugs and gangs and make something of themselves. People are different and do not all respond the same to the same situations.
Seems to me like you should try to minimize contact with your sister. She is obviously not a good influence in your life, so reduce the time around her. And avoid conversations on topics that cause tension. If she pushes the topic tell her flat out you refuse to talk to her about it, and if possible, just end the conversation, hang up, leave the room/building or whatever. I, personally, don't waste time on people like that, related to me or not.
 
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reject-tech

Guest
#8
I don't know what to do. Help?
Keep your virginity.
And understand that your sister's honeymoon will just be another casual act of sex with her husband, even if they make the night "special", it will only be to a degree that can come by external means like "candlelight" and "music", and so on. But never again from within. If she's only been with her fiancee, at least it's not a total loss.
Don't point it out to her or gloat, have a little pity.
Feel a little grace from God, that for whatever reason, He chose to make virginity this valuable to you.
It means you won that battle of valuing it without having to have lost it and felt sorry.
Your sister will feel sorry some day, even if it's not until the last day.
Then she'll understand, and, I believe, have it restored like all the others that fell or were deceived.
They might not even remember.
 
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Balletlover

Guest
#9
I think you need to talk to your sister in a serious manner and explain to her that you are waiting for marriage because that is what God wants and has asked us to do. If she's a Christian, it's her duty to follow the Word as well. Honestly I think she's just jealous. If she's being that immature about it I can almost guarantee you it's jealously. My friend started having sex at 17 and now that we are both 23 almost 24 she keeps telling me to wait and that she regrets not waiting. She says sex is very overrated. She even cried when she told me about her not being a virgin (I thought she was). It's hard for women who are not married to even enjoy sex. There are studies on this. So her bashing you is probably a way to make herself feel better about the regret she feels.

Be proud to be a virgin (not too proud) but just be glad with your decision to wait. I'm sure Jesus is and your future husband will be too :)
 
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Balletlover

Guest
#10
I wanted to add that I am going on 24 and I am also waiting for marriage. I think it's a great gift for Jesus and my future spouse. Not only that though, it also saves us a lot of heartache. The Bible is the Word of God and he knows what is best for us. I'm proud of you girl for staying true to your morals despite what your sis is telling you! :D
 
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alehandra

Guest
#11
I wanted to add that I am going on 24 and I am also waiting for marriage. I think it's a great gift for Jesus and my future spouse. Not only that though, it also saves us a lot of heartache. The Bible is the Word of God and he knows what is best for us. I'm proud of you girl for staying true to your morals despite what your sis is telling you! :D
im agree with balletlover, u know until now im still single and virgin and im proud to be.. I have never have sex before, had never kissed or anything, maybe it sounds very funnie to some people. But I do all this with joy, and im be thankful that I have no hurt or anything. I believe my first kiss and my first sex it is the best gift I can give to my future husband...

btw, balletlover nice to know u, im a balerina too... =)

be blessing
-cilla-
 
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danschance

Guest
#12
It is much better to wait for the spouse God has for you than to marry satan's second best.
 

dawnmarie20

Junior Member
Feb 26, 2013
12
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#13
its better to keep your virginity and be ridiculed about it than to lose it and feel terrible, i have been down that road, but i gave into the pressure. don't give in. praying for you
 
Mar 22, 2013
4,718
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Indiana
#14
if you dont stand for something you will fall for anything.

keep it till you are married, you will be much better off
 

jb

Senior Member
Feb 27, 2010
4,940
591
113
#15
I get really frustrated when people question my personal values when they have no room to talk themselves. My sister is sexually active with her fiancé and she was ridiculing me for maintaining my innocence until I am married. I believe my virginity is the greatest gift I can give my future husband on my wedding night. I guess the reason I got so frustrated is because the person who did that is my sister and we both were raised not to question values that we feel strongly about. I don't know what to do. Help?
One of the things unfortunately we cannot choose is our siblings and often it is from them that a Christian will receive the most flack from.

Look upon this aggrevation from her (and any other person) not something that makes you go under, but use it in a positive way to get stronger in defending your belief, not in an aggressive manner but in a firm polite way...
 
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Jordache

Guest
#16
What I've read, I agree with; but here's another thing to consider. Often times people judge in order to make themselves feel less guilty. This is why scripture talks about taking the log out of your own eye first.
 
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colalella2891

Guest
#17
This is common in today's society... If I tell someone i'm a virgin at 22, they gasp. I've been told i'm crazy for waiting until marriage. It definitely can be very irritating. But don't give in, keep those values. And remember, you're not just doing it for your future husband, but also for God as well. You're honoring God. Waiting until marriage is what He intended.
 
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Jordache

Guest
#18
Since no one has said it, I will. If you do have sex, you will likely want to stop. Here's the catch. It's MUCH more difficult to abstain after you've had it no matter how convicted you were.
 
Sep 3, 2013
38
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#19
I think it's AWESOME that you're honoring God in purity. I'm so encouraged by the stand you've taken, and God is SO proud of you! I wanted to encourage you with this verse:

"Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to he believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity." 1 Tim. 4:12

This has been a huge encouragement to me in my own walk in purity, and no doubt I have struggled at times.. but the Word of God is such a comfort. And seeing so many other brothers and sisters in Christ taking the same stand! God bless you!
 
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spacefreak

Guest
#20
good for you,i know it's not easy because i am virgin myself and it's something to be proud of.you will be happy you waited because when the the right person that GOD wants you to marry is the person that's worth being with after being married
GOD be with you.