Should a church board make any ruling about church dress code?

[RedTent]

Now that our media is promoting dress to attract sexually, many of our young people are following the style, often with complete innocence about the intentions of these styles. Their dress often show as much of their breasts as possible without them flopping loose, with skirts split or short enough to only hide their panties. This sort of dress has even been seen on the stage in our church.

Some of us were discussing what we could do about this. My opinion is that the church should set some rules, but I have been delving into books telling of the effect in our world of our being taught about tolerance. Most of what I find is that the very demons are joyful over our stand about God’s law being only in our hearts, without making any stand setting actual boundaries.

The books I am reading promote the idea of saying this is sin, and here we stand, for the demons use every tactic to push for sin and evil. Our fuzzy boundaries of sin is used to their advantage. But some think the church must not take a stand.

Do you think the church can take a stand, and if so, what stand?

 

[Ugly]

Every public place you go to has dress codes. Walk into a Walmart not dressed to certain standards they ask you to leave. Why should church be any different? Perhaps not the first time someone visits, but if someone starts coming regularly to the church and is dressed inappropriately then something should be said.
But then again, i don't believe churches are made for the unsaved, even though that is the common thinking anymore. I think churches are for Christians to fellowship and learn. Taught to go out to the unsaved and preach to them, bringing them to salvation. Not teach Christians how to get the unsaved to church. So that has an affect on my opinion. If i bought into this 'seeker friendly' church idea then i would likely say the opposite.

 

[SparkleEyes]

The worship leader should have a say about the dress on the platform (stage). The worship leader should get direction from the pastoral staff and elders. The leader should not let anyone (male or female) on the platform if they have anything objectionable on. These people are setting the standard for the church. If they have anything inappropriate on, they are telling others in the building that the church is OK with what is on their body.

 

[1still_waters]

The problem with things is that the pendulum swings back and forth.
Often the swing back is over done.
It's like driving a car. If you turn the steering wheel too much to avoid something, you may end up in the ditch.

A church board ordained dress code may be an over steering.

 

[Anonimous]

Every public place you go to has dress codes. Walk into a Walmart not dressed to certain standards they ask you to leave. Why should church be any different? Perhaps not the first time someone visits, but if someone starts coming regularly to the church and is dressed inappropriately then something should be said.
But then again, i don't believe churches are made for the unsaved, even though that is the common thinking anymore. I think churches are for Christians to fellowship and learn. Taught to go out to the unsaved and preach to them, bringing them to salvation. Not teach Christians how to get the unsaved to church. So that has an affect on my opinion. If i bought into this 'seeker friendly' church idea then i would likely say the opposite.

If you have ever seen the People of Walmart videos it is obvious there are no dress codes...and even less fashion sense.

 

[Jordache]

I don't believe the church should make the ruling as a whole, but certainly there should be rules for those in leadership, esp visual leadership positions. However, there also has to be grace. I have had a few conversations with girls on the worship team. This isn't to say that I've done it perfectly, but I do aim for a standard.

 

[danschance]

Of the churches that might have a dress code...

Let's say a hooker walks past a church and decides to come in. Would you deny her access because she is wearing something revealing? Don't let your rules bar sinners from getting saved. God doesn't care about dress codes and neither do I.

 

[zaoman32]

We're supposed to be open for everyone. I think having a standardized dress code that is regularly enforced seems a little snobbish and haughty, rather than being inviting to those who should be in the church. Another issue I have with it is, it's subjective. I went to a christian camp every summer that discouraged girls to where bikinis, which is fine, but when two girls are swimming in bikini's and you tell one to wear a t-shirt, and say nothing to the other one.....uhhhhh, wait what? This camp, of course, was not the only time a situation like this occurred.

I don't know what kind of books you're reading, but if they're focusing on the reactions of demons to our behavior, I think they're missing the point of the cross. Number one, I'm sure these authors have no REAL one on one experience with demons, and if they did I'd be concerned. Number two, our focus should be on glorifying God, and doing what we do for His glory, not what are we doing wrong. We know what we do wrong...that's what the Holy Spirit is here for, we repent and ask forgiveness, not make rules and and babysit the world. Also keep in mind that this is the exact type of thing the pharisees were doing. Making rules to keep people from demons (look at any instance where they call Jesus demon possessed and chastise him about the Sabbath), and we all know how well things turned out for them....

 

[RedTent]

I don't know what kind of books you're reading, but if they're focusing on the reactions of demons to our behavior, I think they're missing the point of the cross. Number one, I'm sure these authors have no REAL one on one experience with demons, and if they did I'd be concerned. Number two, our focus should be on glorifying God, and doing what we do for His glory, not what are we doing wrong. We know what we do wrong...that's what the Holy Spirit is here for, we repent and ask forgiveness, not make rules and and babysit the world. Also keep in mind that this is the exact type of thing the pharisees were doing. Making rules to keep people from demons (look at any instance where they call Jesus demon possessed and chastise him about the Sabbath), and we all know how well things turned out for them....

I have been reading the books of a psychiatrist who has worked with exorcism, and has led people in his field in recognizing evil and the possibility of demon possession. He is very well respected, according to the net, as a leader in his field. Also one of a friend of his who is an ex-priest who writes of his experiences with exorcism. Both books speak to the churches need to define sin and make rules. They feel that our church using the misuse of rules by the Pharisees as a reason not to label sin as sin is a mistake. They don't seem to feel the rules are to keep people from demons at all, it is so demons can't use their power to say "Oh, that is OK". They feel the Holy Spirit is here for our understanding of God, and not to replace study. Your reasons why you feel that is wrong would be interesting.

I have found that there are few writers in this field who are not sensationalist, or can speak as professionals, most books on this subject are best left alone.

 

[zaoman32]

I have been reading the books of a psychiatrist who has worked with exorcism, and has led people in his field in recognizing evil and the possibility of demon possession. He is very well respected, according to the net, as a leader in his field. Also one of a friend of his who is an ex-priest who writes of his experiences with exorcism. Both books speak to the churches need to define sin and make rules. They feel that our church using the misuse of rules by the Pharisees as a reason not to label sin as sin is a mistake. They don't seem to feel the rules are to keep people from demons at all, it is so demons can't use their power to say "Oh, that is OK". They feel the Holy Spirit is here for our understanding of God, and not to replace study. Your reasons why you feel that is wrong would be interesting.

I have found that there are few writers in this field who are not sensationalist, or can speak as professionals, most books on this subject are best left alone.

My reasons against this, our focus is to be on Jesus, not demons. Do everything we do to glorify God. I'm definitely not saying we should just say "Hey, we're forgiven let's do whatever we want." To kind of paraphrase Dietrich Bonhoeffer God does not forbid us from anything, he bids us to look on Him. Exorcisms, and spiritual warfare and all that may not be bad things, but, again, if our eyes are to be on Jesus, demons would be plenty more happy getting our focus on them (be it positive or negative) than they would if we slipped up here and there. We're going to slip up, it's a fact of life, but focusing on demons rather than God? Good intentions or not, can lead to a scary place.

 

[RedTent]

My reasons against this, our focus is to be on Jesus, not demons. Do everything we do to glorify God. I'm definitely not saying we should just say "Hey, we're forgiven let's do whatever we want." To kind of paraphrase Dietrich Bonhoeffer God does not forbid us from anything, he bids us to look on Him. Exorcisms, and spiritual warfare and all that may not be bad things, but, again, if our eyes are to be on Jesus, demons would be plenty more happy getting our focus on them (be it positive or negative) than they would if we slipped up here and there. We're going to slip up, it's a fact of life, but focusing on demons rather than God? Good intentions or not, can lead to a scary place.

I agree, if we focus on demons, what is wrong, etc. we are focusing on the wrong things. We are warned not to do that in Phil 4:8 about what we are to think about.

However, I do think that we also need to give equal importance to "do these things" as we give to other scriptures. When people like Peck or Martin show us how and why something doesn't work for us and scripture backs it up, I think we should listen as long as we don't let it stop our forward walk in the Lord, like getting hung up on demons could do.

 

[resurrection33]

Now that our media is promoting dress to attract sexually, many of our young people are following the style, often with complete innocence about the intentions of these styles. Their dress often show as much of their breasts as possible without them flopping loose, with skirts split or short enough to only hide their panties. This sort of dress has even been seen on the stage in our church.

Some of us were discussing what we could do about this. My opinion is that the church should set some rules, but I have been delving into books telling of the effect in our world of our being taught about tolerance. Most of what I find is that the very demons are joyful over our stand about God’s law being only in our hearts, without making any stand setting actual boundaries.

The books I am reading promote the idea of saying this is sin, and here we stand, for the demons use every tactic to push for sin and evil. Our fuzzy boundaries of sin is used to their advantage. But some think the church must not take a stand.

Do you think the church can take a stand, and if so, what stand?

People should always speak out for what is right. People should dress modestly. It is a sin to look lustfully at a person (Matt 5:28) and therefore it is a sin to dress in such a way as to tempt people to look lustfully at you. I don't know how easy it would be to create a dress code, but just speaking out should help.

 

[danschance]

My reasons against this, our focus is to be on Jesus, not demons. Do everything we do to glorify God. I'm definitely not saying we should just say "Hey, we're forgiven let's do whatever we want." To kind of paraphrase Dietrich Bonhoeffer God does not forbid us from anything, he bids us to look on Him. Exorcisms, and spiritual warfare and all that may not be bad things, but, again, if our eyes are to be on Jesus, demons would be plenty more happy getting our focus on them (be it positive or negative) than they would if we slipped up here and there. We're going to slip up, it's a fact of life, but focusing on demons rather than God? Good intentions or not, can lead to a scary place.

Our focus is never solely on demons. Even so to help others with demons is our duty. In order to help others with demons we must know something about them. So there is nothing wrong in reading a book about deliverance.

I have cast demons out of other people. Yet opponents of deliverance are those who have never once encountered a demon and would be completely incompetent in dealing with them. Yet they peanut gallery still wants to tell others what they should do and what they should not do from the comfort of their lazy boy.

 

[J-Kay]

I appreciate RED TENT bringing up the topic. I know what she is trying to convey and hope I can
recall most of what she brought out.
I know the Worship Leader is in charge of the Worship Team. I think it can be done quietly if one
sees a member dressed in short skirts on and this is on stage and congregation can see upward.
I speak from experience. I told a member it was not really good for the member of Worship team
to dress with short skirts. For the reason I spoke of. You could see upward. It was quietly taken to
the Leader and after that the Leader took it to the team, and the ladies began dressing more modestly.
The temptation is too strong in some men and taking the focus off Christ and on having to keep from
looking where their eyes are drawn, this is why it had to be done.

The demons RED TENT speaks of, is rampant, even in Church. I have asked myself, do these Mothers
not care how they dress, or their daughters ? Do these women or girls NOT look in the mirror before
they leave for Church ? And my answer came back to me ... YES... they do know how provocative they
look. I have seen young Mothers bend over to take care of their baby, and / or just simply to put their
Bible down, and their breast are very exposed. What demon is that ? Do they know they are being led
by demonic influence ? Probably not, because as RED TENT said it is all over the place and seems normal.
But Church is not the place to expose our sexuality. Now, as for the speaking of demonic, it should be
known by every Leader that they are fighting Spiritual Warfare, and if that is not Demons, what is it ?

Okay, about the prostitute walking by the Church, and would she be asked to leave? O, Lord I hope that
never happens. I believe once a woman who has been saved she would soon know Jesus has cleaned her
up and given her a new life, and that includes a new look.

I repeat, I believe a Church should speak quietly to the person who is exposing more than Christ would
be comfortable with. It can't hurt to have rules made up anyway. Other rules, and that could be one in
it. Then when a new person begins to attend, they can be given the rules that the whole Church must
be in agreement with. We don't need the emphasis constantly on how to dress. We must remember whom
we represent and a good God fearing, God loving, Soul saving Church is going to be more believable as
a true Christian Church that lifts up Jesus Christ.

 

[gb9]

this happened at the Church I was going to a couple of years ago. one Sunday I saw one of the teenage girls wearing what looked like a one piece swimsuit. a short one piece swimsuit. what was so strange about that was her dad was probably the most conservative dude at this Church. he was there that day. so what should someone had said to him or her mom?

 

[RedTent]

this happened at the Church I was going to a couple of years ago. one Sunday I saw one of the teenage girls wearing what looked like a one piece swimsuit. a short one piece swimsuit. what was so strange about that was her dad was probably the most conservative dude at this Church. he was there that day. so what should someone had said to him or her mom?

I think that scripture is quite clear that this should not be handled by individuals in the church, but by elected officials of the church.

 

[allaboutlove]

There should be a certain code of dress for memebers but no one should ever be denyed acsses just because of there cloths.. an there are some churches that bring it waay to far i had a girlfriend get kicked out of a church one time for dying her hair.

 

[J-Kay]

I think that scripture is quite clear that this should not be handled by individuals in the church, but by elected officials of the church.

I agree RedTent. However, don't you think having rules made up by the leaders, and given
out once it is apparent the person is going to be attending regularly ? Then if that person
does not follow through with the rules as set in their by-laws, they could be called in for a
meeting ?

Jezebel spirits are rampant and will do anything to cause a Pastor to fall, or anyone in leadership.
Next she/he will go after those who attend faithfully. When it is least expected that dart will
eventually hit its target.

 

[J-Kay]

I heard a story about a young woman who walked into a Church and
she was dressed inappropriately and the men met her at the door and
refused her entrance. This was years ago. Can you imagine what would
be considered inappropriate today ? Anyway, I still feel they deserve to
be welcomed. And if they begin to find Christ as their Savior, the Holy
Spirit will convict. It is sad day when the Church has to tell women how
they should dress. We want more than anything to see the person give
their life to Christ.

Speaking of dressing for Church. Does anyone recall when women and
men wore their very best and dressed up for Worship in the Sanctuary?
I was glad when we were permitted to wear slacks. I think dress slacks
and nice top and jacket is neat. But, it all depends on the Church and
what they require the dress code be.

Another story I read recently about a man who came in dressed very
shabbily. He was snubbed by everyone. The Leader standing at the
podium said "today we will be introducing our new Pastor." The man
who was told to sit in back, stood up, walked down the aisle and went
to the Podium. Imagine the shock the congregation felt. No, he was
not a shabby dresser, he was testing his congregation to see how they
would treat a visitor who comes in dressed in whatever they had to wear.
Awesome story ~

 

[Jordache]

It's one thing to guide others. It's a whole other thing to try and play their Holy Spirit.